Positive Energy
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Nov 2008
Location: Canada
Posts: 132
Positive Energy
After X contacted me last week, and the ensuing fiasco, I had a tough few days.
But I think getting all that crap off my chest has really helped. I've been feeling really positive the last few days - I actually realized it this morning while driving to work. I realized that I was singing along to the radio - at the top of my lungs. I only sing like that when I'm feeling GOOD.
I haven't been thinking that much about my X - or at least I find it easy to change my thoughts when I realize that I AM thinking about him. The thoughts I do have aren't toxic - they're more like passing, fleeting thoughts. I believe that I cannot move forward if I'm harboring anger and hate; by ripping into him last week and unloading all the things I wanted to say (and HAVE wanted to say for a long long time), I think I am finally able to feel something other than self-pity, anger, resentment, fear, etc...
I felt really GOOD today. And people notice; when I arrived at work, I was actually smiling and looked forward to getting things done.
Sometimes, I think my HP is playing games with me though. Although I accept that things will remind me of him, I have to laugh at two things that happened today:
1) As I breezed into Starbuck's this morning (notice I said "breezing"? breezing is more much more attractive than schlepping!!), there was an obscure jazz song playing ..... I laughed inside and said "Funny one, HP. Very funny"
2) My X's aunt called my office today about a financial matter; there are about 40 of us that could have taken that call - but it was me that ended up taking it. Once again - I asked my HP - "what's up with THAT?"
I've decided it's simply my HP's way of telling me that I can never completely forget my X; but to move forward, I have to make peace with the situation. Could it be an example of living life on life's terms?
But I think getting all that crap off my chest has really helped. I've been feeling really positive the last few days - I actually realized it this morning while driving to work. I realized that I was singing along to the radio - at the top of my lungs. I only sing like that when I'm feeling GOOD.
I haven't been thinking that much about my X - or at least I find it easy to change my thoughts when I realize that I AM thinking about him. The thoughts I do have aren't toxic - they're more like passing, fleeting thoughts. I believe that I cannot move forward if I'm harboring anger and hate; by ripping into him last week and unloading all the things I wanted to say (and HAVE wanted to say for a long long time), I think I am finally able to feel something other than self-pity, anger, resentment, fear, etc...
I felt really GOOD today. And people notice; when I arrived at work, I was actually smiling and looked forward to getting things done.
Sometimes, I think my HP is playing games with me though. Although I accept that things will remind me of him, I have to laugh at two things that happened today:
1) As I breezed into Starbuck's this morning (notice I said "breezing"? breezing is more much more attractive than schlepping!!), there was an obscure jazz song playing ..... I laughed inside and said "Funny one, HP. Very funny"
2) My X's aunt called my office today about a financial matter; there are about 40 of us that could have taken that call - but it was me that ended up taking it. Once again - I asked my HP - "what's up with THAT?"
I've decided it's simply my HP's way of telling me that I can never completely forget my X; but to move forward, I have to make peace with the situation. Could it be an example of living life on life's terms?
Member
Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: Waterford MI
Posts: 4,202
Thank you for this BumblingAlong.
Yes, breezing is much easier to do in cold weather when you are feeling good.
Sometimes, I will start a conversation and smile with someone in a line, like at Starbucks.
I consider myself very reserved, so it is always a boost to get positive feedback.
Yep, feeling better myself now.
Beth
Yes, breezing is much easier to do in cold weather when you are feeling good.
Sometimes, I will start a conversation and smile with someone in a line, like at Starbucks.
I consider myself very reserved, so it is always a boost to get positive feedback.
Yep, feeling better myself now.
Beth
Rising from the Ashes
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: Republic of Texas
Posts: 451
BumblingAlong,
We acquire the strength we have overcome. ~Ralph Waldo Emerson
Birds sing after a storm; why shouldn't people feel as free to delight in whatever remains to them? ~Rose F. Kennedy
We must embrace pain and burn it as fuel for our journey. ~Kenji Miyazawa
Adversity is like a strong wind. It tears away from us all but the things that cannot be torn, so that we see ourselves as we really are. ~Arthur Golden, Memoirs of a Geisha
Sometimes in tragedy we find our life's purpose - the eye sheds a tear to find its focus. ~Robert Brault, A Robert Brault Reader
Convert difficulties into opportunities, for difficulties are divine surgeries to make you better. ~Author Unknown
*************************
We acquire the strength we have overcome. ~Ralph Waldo Emerson
Birds sing after a storm; why shouldn't people feel as free to delight in whatever remains to them? ~Rose F. Kennedy
We must embrace pain and burn it as fuel for our journey. ~Kenji Miyazawa
Adversity is like a strong wind. It tears away from us all but the things that cannot be torn, so that we see ourselves as we really are. ~Arthur Golden, Memoirs of a Geisha
Sometimes in tragedy we find our life's purpose - the eye sheds a tear to find its focus. ~Robert Brault, A Robert Brault Reader
Convert difficulties into opportunities, for difficulties are divine surgeries to make you better. ~Author Unknown
*************************
Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
