Free
 

Well, at 11:30 this morning, my lawyer and I presented in the judge's chambers, and by 11:40 this morning, my marriage was declared "a vinculo matrimonii" which is fancy lawyerspeak for "irretrievably broken."

I guess it's par for the course. I mean, I generally operate in the medical realm, which definitely has its own language, but this was more stiffly formal than I guess I thought.

Long story, it's over.
It's over.
It's over.

I went straight to the SS office, then the DMV (who knew you needed a passport to get a new driver's license??), then the bank, then the grocery store for a feast. And made a bunch of calls to change my name in as many places as I could. When I got home, I discovered that my best friend had sent me flowers and frozen croissants (who knew?? And pain au chocolate! Apparently I just thaw, rise and bake. I was so shocked!) (Note that I've never gotten frozen pastries before, what a novelty!)

I opened a bottle of wine "we'd" been saving. We got it on our first anniversary, before he'd really declared his illness. We were saving it - first for my finishing school, then my residency, and then it became painfully obvious that he'd never be able to partake.

I decided some time ago that I'd need to enjoy it sometime, and rather than it turn to vinegar waiting for a "good time," I had it tonight. Well, half of it. Ok, 2 glasses. Plenty for me. Darn good red, I might add. Maybe a little bittersweet, but I'm just glad it's over.

And I've had several friends call or leave messages of well-wishes for the future. I'm just so blessed. And wanted to share that joy with you all, who kicked me in the rear to get it done with.

I'm mostly thrilled to have my name back. I hypenated when we married, but never used his name professionally. It became more and more of an annoyance over the years, as systems just aren't in place to deal with a hyphenated name. And I'm free of it now!

And I need to get to bed, as work comes early tomorrow.
Thanks everyone, and Hugs.
D

Congratulations D!!!! I know this was such a hard road but you are now free. You sound so happy and carefree. I am bursting with joy for you! It does get better. Without them. Here is to your new beginning! Cheers!

Hugs
Lulu

well done, dmc!

and i'm glad you treated yourself with some red wine and croissants!

be good to yourself.

welcome to your new life! we're here if you hit bumps in the road.

naive

Personally, I think the end of a love is something to mourn, not celebrate, but I guess it's different for everyone.

Congratulations on your freedom, you probably never thought you'll post something like this when you were exchanging vows.

The end of the love probably came a loong time ago. At least that part happened long before my divorce was final. My divorce were the last lines at the end of a chapter in my life that was frought with pain. The celebration was like the first lines of the next chapter.

How wonderful that your friends acknowledged the day and YAY for getting your own name back. Carry the joy and freedom with you. Best wishes with your next chapter!

Congratulations on your new single life, and I am sorry for the loss of what started out as a hope-filled marriage.

Now you can leave the bad and hard times, for new experiences.

http://i532.photobucket.com/albums/e...bon_2043-1.jpg

pop the cork! let all of us grab a chair and a glass *come on now, fill them up!*, and give you hugs in the celebration!

:cheer

phineas,
I mourned this love plenty. And trust me, it hurt - more than I ever thought possible. Never in a MILLION years would I have imagined what would befall my beloved, who had never even had a sip when we started dating. How's that for crazy?


We were married for 11 years, together for 4+ before that, and I've been contemplating divorce for, um, 6 years. Just took me a long time to go through with it. The process takes a long time.

I'm just glad it's over. And this is definitely the beginning of a new chapter. That last one was indeed long and painful. Here's to new beginnings! (And not making that mistake twice!)

Best of luck to you as you begin a new life!

Congratulations!

I have filed and am serving in the new year. I hope to be where you are soon.