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Went to my first Al-anon mtg.

Old 11-18-2010, 08:07 AM
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Red face Went to my first Al-anon mtg.

I feel as though a huge weight has been lifted off of my chest. I have a million questions. The people were warm and extremely caring. It was a huge and unfortunate relief to hear the many stories of loved ones affected by this horrible disease.

I am just now quite sure how to deal w/ AH asking me how my meetings went. He has asked me what they talk about and if I feel better? Not quite sure how to handle that one. I want to say, "I feel a lot better knowing I am not the only one living w/ an AH!!!!" That I am not the only one who's world has fallen apart because you do not have life coping skills. I just tell him that it is a group where I talk and I don't feel so alone and I try and change the subject. This is for me and our babies. Not for you.

Also, he is overjoyed that he has found anti-depressants and I am happy if they make him feel better. I do not reply when he tells me, "This is it, no more drinking." I know that he can't make that promise to me as I have did in the past. I am living one day at a time.
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Old 11-18-2010, 08:27 AM
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AWW Yah! AWW Yah!
Let's hear it for sassy!

That's it, girl.
One day at a time.
Keep the meeting details quiet and keep plugging away on growing yourself.

I'm so happy for you for moving forward in self growth.

Hugs
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Old 11-18-2010, 08:27 AM
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That is all great stuff..you are even enforcing your boundaries , making time for your recovery, and not taking the baited hook(my drinking days r over!) That is quite a bit of progress.Keep going back!
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Old 11-18-2010, 08:48 AM
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Keep going! yay!
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Old 11-18-2010, 09:19 AM
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Well done!

Keep it up, it works!
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Old 11-18-2010, 09:23 AM
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Originally Posted by sassyea View Post
I feel as though a huge weight has been lifted off of my chest.

I am just now quite sure how to deal w/ AH asking me how my meetings went. He has asked me what they talk about and if I feel better?

Also, he is overjoyed that he has found anti-depressants
I felt exactly the same way in my first meeting, I was sure I was the only man on the planet to dealing with a drunken wife, with a little girl to worry about.

Many alcoholics describe themselves as ego-maniacs with inferiority complexes. So naturally he believes the meetings are a bunch of women sitting around plotting about what to do about HIM. Probably making him a little nervous!

My axw found anti-depressants too, saved us a lot of money on beer. With an anti-depressant in her, 3 beers rendered the same effect as 12 or so. Just giving you a heads up.

Great job on your first meeting, glad you had a positive experience. Keep coming back, you will figure all this out.

Thanks and God bless us all,
Coyote
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Old 11-18-2010, 10:19 AM
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(((Sassy)))

Awesome Step in taking care of YOU!

We're here for you!
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Old 11-18-2010, 10:25 AM
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When I went to my first Al-Anon in July of this year, I was frusterated & anngry. I wanted to fix EVERYTHING about my wife's drinking & could not do it. After attending the meeting, I felt relieved. Things did not change for me overnight. I'm still struggeling, but I've found that a special bond within Al-Anon that is difficult for me to describe. The support that I've received has been exraordinary. I've learned coping skills & my attitude has changed for the better. Keep going! It works & it is work. I've found that it's worth it.

My wife asks about the meetings too. It does make her nervous because she thinks I'm plotting against her. I take special care to make sure that I talk about me at the meetings, not her.
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Old 11-18-2010, 10:43 AM
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Bueller? Bueller? Bueller?

After some inital suspicion, my wife transitioned over the years to be a big fan of Al-Anon for me. Now when I'm twisting up and don't catch myself, she or my daughter are both liable to "suggest" a meeting for me.

Thumbs up!
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