Need to stop contact
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: London, England
Posts: 211
Need to stop contact
He keeps messaging me telling me that if I was there I would be a good influence on him and he wouldn't be doing so much coke. It's such ********. If I was there he would consider me a massive inconvenience just like he always did. I need to stop contact with this guy. Tells me everyone there is doing it all the time and he was so much healthier when we were together and he was barely drinking/using drugs to "help me in my recovery" (was actually using drugs and/or drink every day in front of me). I am angry with myself for entering into conversations with him!
RIP Sweet Suki
Join Date: Apr 2008
Location: In my sanctuary, my home
Posts: 39,902
What a cute little puppy!!! Oh my! That little guy deserves your attention. The bigger guy needs to learn to take care of himself. I agree with everything naive said. Hang in there, you're doing great!
Hang tough, you're worth it! And so is that cute little puppy. Great picture!
Member
Join Date: Jul 2008
Location: At the top of my mountain.
Posts: 124
It's not your calling to be invaded, chewed up, and spit out again to make this guy evolve into a better person. Someone who wants to make someone else a reason for his recovery will make that same person the reason for his relapse. Let the big boy make his own choices, and take the consequences too---and ignore the crazy-making quacking.
And don't be angry at yourself---learning to be and stay no contact is a skill, and takes time to learn, considering how most of us here were focusing all our time and energy toward the addict in our lives. Not an easy task to turn that focus and energy on ourselves, where it belongs! But I find it gets easier every day---and the payoff of peacefulness and sanity is so worth it! Personally, I no longer think I'm going to develop health problems from constant stress, now that my STBXAH is out of the picture!
And don't be angry at yourself---learning to be and stay no contact is a skill, and takes time to learn, considering how most of us here were focusing all our time and energy toward the addict in our lives. Not an easy task to turn that focus and energy on ourselves, where it belongs! But I find it gets easier every day---and the payoff of peacefulness and sanity is so worth it! Personally, I no longer think I'm going to develop health problems from constant stress, now that my STBXAH is out of the picture!
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