Blogs


Notices

perfectionism, indecision, paralysis etc

Old 11-11-2010, 09:01 AM
  # 1 (permalink)  
Member
Thread Starter
 
JenT1968's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2006
Location: UK
Posts: 1,149
Blog Entries: 1
perfectionism, indecision, paralysis etc

I've got a whole bunch of decisions to make, job, home, car, divorce, ugh, all of them interlinked, interdependent and unsure. I don't feel I have enough information to make any of the right decisions. Concrete decisions based on smoke and mirrors and predictions of a shifting future. UUUGGGHHHH!

I haven't felt this way for a long time, since I was cycling round and round trying to decide (for years) whether to leave or stay with hvstbxAH. Not having the information I needed to make an informed choice, the right choice, the best, most perfect choice. Paralysed into indecision and incapacity by not wanting to make the wrong choice.

I am now at the point on some of these where I just have to jump, to make a decision, any decision, pretty much blind.

Wow this is very uncomfortable for me, I had forgotton how much, and the paralysis over the big things is spilling over into the small every day decisions that I ususally cary out on automatic.

Trying hard to let go of the outcome, when the point of the decision IS the outcome is hard. Allowing myself the possibility of making whatturns out to be a bad decision, without regret or self-reproach is tough for me too.

What characteristics and feelings are you struggling with today?
JenT1968 is offline  
The Following 6 Users Say Thank You to JenT1968 For This Useful Post:
acdirito (11-12-2010), coyote21 (11-11-2010), crystal226 (11-17-2010), Learn2Live (11-11-2010), notforgotten (11-12-2010), TakingCharge999 (11-11-2010)
Old 11-11-2010, 09:06 AM
  # 2 (permalink)  
Alive in the Superunknown
 
Thumpalumpacus's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: 30.47N, 98.15W
Posts: 1,460
My little voice hasn't urged me to go buy beer yet, but it will. I'll deal with him when he comes, and until then enjoy a nice autumn morning.
Thumpalumpacus is offline  
The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to Thumpalumpacus For This Useful Post:
JenT1968 (11-12-2010), wicked (11-11-2010)
Old 11-11-2010, 10:05 AM
  # 3 (permalink)  
Awakening
 
coyote21's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2006
Location: Beautiful Texas hillcountry
Posts: 1,272
I am struggling with my usual procrastination today/yesterday/the day before that. I've decided I want to return to college rather than just get another truck driving job.

The last 2 I've been laid off after a few years just as I began to get ahead. Also, what used to be fairly good pay has steadily declined over the last few years.

Although I'm still on schedule to apply for this spring, which will set the stage for the program application for next fall, I'm dragging my feet as usual.

I seem to only be motivated into action when my situation gets "critical", or at the last possible minute.

I still don't know if my scheme is even doable until I talk to the financial aid dept tomorrow. I've been worrying, not much, but still. I could have put my worries to rest weeks ago by just fact gathering at the appropriate office, but have chosen not to, for what ever reason.

Even if I do qualify for financial aid, I would need to have my little headlight business to help supplement my income, and I haven't "hit a lick at a snake" for months to promote it, because my unemployment insurance is still good. Geeze, I've been stuck. I am a victim of my own lack of motivation. I have much self-reproach today.

Thanks and God bless us all,
Coyote
coyote21 is offline  
The Following 4 Users Say Thank You to coyote21 For This Useful Post:
acdirito (11-12-2010), JenT1968 (11-12-2010), TakingCharge999 (11-11-2010), wicked (11-11-2010)
Old 11-11-2010, 10:23 AM
  # 4 (permalink)  
Member
 
Bernadette's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: Boston
Posts: 2,806
Allow yourself the freedom to make imperfect choices. Sometimes just deciding and moving in a direction makes it very clear what the next right thing is to do.

Easy does it!
Peace-
B
Bernadette is offline  
The Following 5 Users Say Thank You to Bernadette For This Useful Post:
bookwyrm (11-11-2010), JenT1968 (11-12-2010), notforgotten (11-12-2010), TakingCharge999 (11-11-2010), Thumper (11-11-2010)
Old 11-11-2010, 10:43 AM
  # 5 (permalink)  
Member
 
Denoraphy's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2007
Location: Sunny Fla
Posts: 112
Oh, how I understand how you are feeling. You have discribed me to a tee.

Living with an addict is draining. I have learned to understand that and to accept it.

I have set some long term goals and I am following through with them. Very slowly, but I am moving forward. I try to look at what I have accomplished thoughout the day instead of what has NOT gotten done. This helps, sometimes we need to be thankful we have just made it though the day. If there is a major project that I need to get done, I put it at the top of my list and that is all I focus on.
Denoraphy is offline  
The Following User Says Thank You to Denoraphy For This Useful Post:
JenT1968 (11-12-2010)
Old 11-12-2010, 12:46 AM
  # 6 (permalink)  
Curled up in a good book...
 
bookwyrm's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: UK
Posts: 1,542
I am struggling with feelings of paranoia and insecurity. My work environment has changed dramatically and I'm really struggling to cope. I've somehow lost my precious detachment at work I had developed after finding recovery and I need it back!
bookwyrm is offline  
The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to bookwyrm For This Useful Post:
JenT1968 (11-12-2010), notforgotten (11-12-2010)

Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
 
Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are Off




All times are GMT -7. The time now is 01:54 AM.