Recovery Discovery
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Sep 2009
Location: Australia
Posts: 281
Recovery Discovery
I've been trying to work out what recovery is. Does it mean I need to 'recover' something, a part of me that was lost? If that's the case, I don't know whether recovery is the right term for me because I've had a life of abuse since I was born, unless I go way back to when I was a soul and try to recover some of the serenity and peace I had before I decided to be born on this earth (again...depending on beliefs). I think I need to look at it in a different way, so I've decided I need to discover myself and learn how to treat myself in a loving way.
A couple of weeks ago, I made a decision to do one nice thing for myself (on my own with no-one to distract me or fill in the void) and one challenging thing a day. This was something I had to give awareness too, in other words, I needed to tell myself "this is the nice thing you're doing for yourself today" and carry it through as I tend to go through my life disconnected a lot of the time and 'going through the motions'. What I've realised is that the 'nice' thing I was going to do for myself is my challenging thing too! How does that work? Why do I find it such a challenge to take time out to do something nice for myself? And yet for others, I would do anything? (Codie alert!). So today, two weeks later, I did the nice thing for myself, on my own. But, it was hard get started! I was looking for any excuse not to do it! Finally, I forced myself to get in my car and drive to a beach. I drove to the most beautiful beach (whitest sand in the world, apparently) and I walked the long stretch of sand with my pants rolled up, wading in the ocean. It was amazing. I loved it! I'm going to do it again.
I ruined it by going to see my XADFH afterwards (he had our daughter today and he wanted me to check up on her because she's at the tail end of the chicken pox and he wasn't sure about something). I loved seeing my daughter, but seeing him just brought up all the pain. Loving someone you know you can't be with. Anyway, moving on.....because this is about me and not him, lol.
Yesterday, I had another breakthrough! My HP has been nudging me in the last two weeks to go 'back to basics'. For me, I kept feeling like I needed to read Louise Hay, You Can Heal Your Life, again. This was the first spiritual book I bought, twenty years ago. It's never far from me. But, I haven't 'worked' the book for so long. So, yesterday morning, I started on the first exercises in the book. I was proud of myself for carrying it through and not procrastinating or finding an excuse not to do it. Then I got a call from two of my friends. They were at the local cafe and invited me to join them. When I arrived, they were drinking their cappucinos and I ordered mine. When mine arrived, the Thai barista served my cappucino and you should have seen it! She had used chocolate and pink syrup to make the most beautiful design on the top of the coffee with a lotus flower in the middle (I love lotus flowers). My friends were shocked asking me why they didn't get a coffee like that. We looked around and every cappucino that came out after was just plain, with the chocolate sprinkled on top. How lucky was I? And wait, there's more. I was given the loyalty card with my cappucino as well as my two friends coffees stamped on my card. They weren't happy, wondering why they didn't get a loyalty card. I told them it had to be the Louise Hay I'd been doing that morning. That I've always felt I'm not worthy and this was a sign from my HP that I am and I'm on the right track.
Now, this might sound trivial to some, but to me, it was a blessing. I'm the one who normally misses out probably because I feel I don't deserve and I'm not worthy. One of my friends who was at the cafe is usually the one who gets everything. We have gone out to lunch often together and ordered the same meal (we go to a club where we can get the best king prawns at a really cheap price) and she'll get a huge plate of prawns and I'd get about three or four prawns and mostly onion. Sometimes she'd feel sorry for me and give me a couple of her prawns, lol. This happened so often, that anyone who joined us noticed and I'd make a joke of it, passing around my plate asking if anyone would like any onions. She is also the one who has the beautiful hubby, kids, home, looks, clothes, jewellery, a huge plasma or LCD TV in every room (two of which they won at the local pub). Has lots of money, has never had to work and is constantly getting thousands of dollars put in her account from her brother and mother as well.... What I noticed was, my other friend has 'Louise Hay'd' a lot in her time and 'got' what I was saying but my friend who has everything became quite indignant and jealous! It was strange! For me, I was grateful for the 'sign' that I'm on the right track but I have to be honest, I did laugh a little on the inside when I saw my friend have a tantrum.
A couple of weeks ago, I made a decision to do one nice thing for myself (on my own with no-one to distract me or fill in the void) and one challenging thing a day. This was something I had to give awareness too, in other words, I needed to tell myself "this is the nice thing you're doing for yourself today" and carry it through as I tend to go through my life disconnected a lot of the time and 'going through the motions'. What I've realised is that the 'nice' thing I was going to do for myself is my challenging thing too! How does that work? Why do I find it such a challenge to take time out to do something nice for myself? And yet for others, I would do anything? (Codie alert!). So today, two weeks later, I did the nice thing for myself, on my own. But, it was hard get started! I was looking for any excuse not to do it! Finally, I forced myself to get in my car and drive to a beach. I drove to the most beautiful beach (whitest sand in the world, apparently) and I walked the long stretch of sand with my pants rolled up, wading in the ocean. It was amazing. I loved it! I'm going to do it again.
I ruined it by going to see my XADFH afterwards (he had our daughter today and he wanted me to check up on her because she's at the tail end of the chicken pox and he wasn't sure about something). I loved seeing my daughter, but seeing him just brought up all the pain. Loving someone you know you can't be with. Anyway, moving on.....because this is about me and not him, lol.
Yesterday, I had another breakthrough! My HP has been nudging me in the last two weeks to go 'back to basics'. For me, I kept feeling like I needed to read Louise Hay, You Can Heal Your Life, again. This was the first spiritual book I bought, twenty years ago. It's never far from me. But, I haven't 'worked' the book for so long. So, yesterday morning, I started on the first exercises in the book. I was proud of myself for carrying it through and not procrastinating or finding an excuse not to do it. Then I got a call from two of my friends. They were at the local cafe and invited me to join them. When I arrived, they were drinking their cappucinos and I ordered mine. When mine arrived, the Thai barista served my cappucino and you should have seen it! She had used chocolate and pink syrup to make the most beautiful design on the top of the coffee with a lotus flower in the middle (I love lotus flowers). My friends were shocked asking me why they didn't get a coffee like that. We looked around and every cappucino that came out after was just plain, with the chocolate sprinkled on top. How lucky was I? And wait, there's more. I was given the loyalty card with my cappucino as well as my two friends coffees stamped on my card. They weren't happy, wondering why they didn't get a loyalty card. I told them it had to be the Louise Hay I'd been doing that morning. That I've always felt I'm not worthy and this was a sign from my HP that I am and I'm on the right track.
Now, this might sound trivial to some, but to me, it was a blessing. I'm the one who normally misses out probably because I feel I don't deserve and I'm not worthy. One of my friends who was at the cafe is usually the one who gets everything. We have gone out to lunch often together and ordered the same meal (we go to a club where we can get the best king prawns at a really cheap price) and she'll get a huge plate of prawns and I'd get about three or four prawns and mostly onion. Sometimes she'd feel sorry for me and give me a couple of her prawns, lol. This happened so often, that anyone who joined us noticed and I'd make a joke of it, passing around my plate asking if anyone would like any onions. She is also the one who has the beautiful hubby, kids, home, looks, clothes, jewellery, a huge plasma or LCD TV in every room (two of which they won at the local pub). Has lots of money, has never had to work and is constantly getting thousands of dollars put in her account from her brother and mother as well.... What I noticed was, my other friend has 'Louise Hay'd' a lot in her time and 'got' what I was saying but my friend who has everything became quite indignant and jealous! It was strange! For me, I was grateful for the 'sign' that I'm on the right track but I have to be honest, I did laugh a little on the inside when I saw my friend have a tantrum.
Awakening
Join Date: Aug 2006
Location: Beautiful Texas hillcountry
Posts: 1,272
Thanks for a great post. I read that book 20 years ago too, it's sitting on my bathroom counter covered in dust. Been feeling kind of stuck myself, may be time to dust her off.
Thanks and God bless us all,
Coyote
Thanks and God bless us all,
Coyote
Member
Join Date: Oct 2010
Location: San Antonio TX
Posts: 133
I have learned the hard way the importance of taking time to smell the roses!
Take time to smell the roses
Time moves along so fast
It could be that your turn is next
Tomorrow might be your last.
Take time to look around you
See loved ones pass away
We do not know the future
It could be you today.
Take time to read the Bible
There’s power in the Light
You think you’ll live forever
But you might go tonight.
Take time for fervent prayer
Lift up His name on high
Call out the name of Jesus
For you will surely die.
Take time for sweet surrender
Seek out His mighty will
Today while you are able
For soon, you will be still.
Take time to grasp the moment
So fast, the clock does tick
We do not know the hour
Your number could be next.
Take time to smell the roses
Before it is too late
Today is full of promise
Tomorrow will not wait.
Author/Written By:
Marilyn Ferguson
******************************:ghug3************** *****************
Take time to smell the roses
Time moves along so fast
It could be that your turn is next
Tomorrow might be your last.
Take time to look around you
See loved ones pass away
We do not know the future
It could be you today.
Take time to read the Bible
There’s power in the Light
You think you’ll live forever
But you might go tonight.
Take time for fervent prayer
Lift up His name on high
Call out the name of Jesus
For you will surely die.
Take time for sweet surrender
Seek out His mighty will
Today while you are able
For soon, you will be still.
Take time to grasp the moment
So fast, the clock does tick
We do not know the hour
Your number could be next.
Take time to smell the roses
Before it is too late
Today is full of promise
Tomorrow will not wait.
Author/Written By:
Marilyn Ferguson
******************************:ghug3************** *****************
same planet...different world
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Butte, America
Posts: 10,946
What a nice thread!
Good for you -
learning to be your own best friend.
That's how it's done.
And you even noticed how hard it is at first.
That was a wonderful read.
Thank you!
Good for you -
learning to be your own best friend.
That's how it's done.
And you even noticed how hard it is at first.
That was a wonderful read.
Thank you!
A jug fills drop by drop
Join Date: Nov 2008
Posts: 6,784
Your post made my night. Thanks for sharing. I LOVED your post. Keep on going to the beach. Sounds wonderful. I love the feeling of wet warm sand on my feet. I believe that is the best feeling I can come up with. Second is rolling in the snow after sauna unfortunately I would have to travel again as there is no snow where I live 
I have been on crutches+neck collar and recently walked somewhere nearby. Just feeling the sun and being able to walk again without crutches was priceless. Thanks for sharing!
I have been on crutches+neck collar and recently walked somewhere nearby. Just feeling the sun and being able to walk again without crutches was priceless. Thanks for sharing!
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Sep 2009
Location: Australia
Posts: 281
Thanks for your replies. It seems a few of us have the old Louise Hay book sitting there, gathering dust waiting to be picked up and read again, lol. Still Waters...mmm, something that doesn't cost money....are there any nice places you can walk? That is, if you're able. That just reminded me, when I was at the gorgeous beach yesterday, I guy in a wheel chair came down the stairs, his mate helping to manouver the chair. Then I saw the guy in the wheel chair using all his upper body strength to get his chair onto the sand with his mate behind him pushing as hard as he could. Both were young men, good looking, surfie types. I wondered what happened to the man in the wheel chair. He looked like he used to ride the waves; now he can only watch them, from a distance. Yesterday and today I gave thanks that I was able to walk along the beach and up the stairs....Thanks Acdirito for the poem..it made me think. Life is short and precious. Barb, you're back! I think you were the first person to reply to my first post on this forum a few months ago and I had been wondering where you were. Good to hear from you. Taking Charge, thankyou for your reply. I didn't make it to the beach today but hope to tomorrow and on Saturday, I'm going to a wedding ceremony on another one of our beautiful beaches! Wow, rolling around in the snow after a sauna! That'd certainly wake you up! I've never tried that. In fact in all my forty years, I've never seen snow except on TV and in the freezer...What happened to your neck and did you break a leg? Glad you're walking again, free of crutches.
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