hmmmmmm

Old 11-01-2010, 05:13 PM
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hmmmmmm

i work with someone who is a bitch to me all day, and i just take it. come home to an alcoholic husband who is rude to me all night. maybe i am codependent. depressed.
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Old 11-01-2010, 05:16 PM
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rubycanoe
I'm sorry that you're feeling down and depressed because of the people around you. Since they've made it very clear that you can't really depend upon them to do anything nice for you......can you think of anything you can do nice for yourself that will make you feel better?

I hope tomorrow is a better day.

gentle hugs
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Old 11-01-2010, 06:11 PM
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How people treat you does not reflect how you deserve to be treated. I hope you can take Kindeyes advice and do something nice for yourself.

Glad you came here.

Wishing you a brighter tomorrow.
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Old 11-01-2010, 06:33 PM
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Why do you take it? Is there anyone you can talk to about the person at work or are they your boss? You don't have to take harassment or bullying at work, really do look into reporting the behaviour. If you don't stand up for yourself it won't stop.

You also don't have to sit with your AH all evening whilst he is rude to you. If he is rude to you get up and leave the room, go in another room and do something, take a portable tv into your bedroom or spare room, go and see a friend, go for a walk, anything to not be around him when he is behaving badly towards you.

You don't have to take it, the more you do, the worse you will feel about yourself. I know I did.
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Old 11-01-2010, 06:59 PM
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As for your work mate, I would just ask this person, what is your problem with me. I am one of these people that wants to resolve an issue and I cannot improve a situation unless I understand what the problem is. You do not have to accept this other persons treatment of you. Sometimes confrontation is the only solution.

Your husband, I would do as Tally suggests. Just walk away.
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Old 11-01-2010, 07:06 PM
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rubycanoe,
The others have given you good advice, and I can't offer anything better by way of suggestions. I'll just tell you that I'm sorry it's been a bad day, and I'm glad you're here.

I'm thinking of attending my first Al-Anon meeting on Thursday. Have you tried it? I have two dear friends who care about me and support me, but no one knows what it's like being married to an A, except others who have been there.

Hang in there. Here's to brighter times ahead.
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Old 11-01-2010, 08:30 PM
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I agree that how while you may feel stuck their behavior, but it is not a reflection of who you really are or how you should be treated. It's a small consolation, but I do try to remind myself that unhappy people will go out of their way to make me feel bad so that they can feel better if only for a moment.
Tomorrow is a new day.
Show yourself you are worth more by trying just one small thing to set a boundary for either of these two. You will feel better and you can build on that each day.
There is a wealth of knowledge on here about how to do it.

I wish you peace tonight and a better tomorrow.

((hugs))

Alice
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Old 11-02-2010, 02:10 AM
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Hi ruby. Have you considered going to a therapist?
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