SoberRecovery : Alcoholism Drug Addiction Help and Information

SoberRecovery : Alcoholism Drug Addiction Help and Information (https://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/)
-   Friends and Family of Alcoholics (https://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/friends-family-alcoholics/)
-   -   OT Ethical question (https://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/friends-family-alcoholics/212071-ot-ethical-question.html)

TakingCharge999 10-27-2010 08:49 PM

OT Ethical question
 
So we rented an extra parking space in the building.

When S left we stopped using it. For some reason none of us notified the one who rented it to us. I started using the one assigned to us.

The person that rented it to us asked about it and I mentioned it have been unused since Sept 15. The policemen can attest to that.

I used to pay the 12th of each month.

What is the ethical thing to do. To pay for each month and day we didn't use it but did not notify her ?

For some reason I suspect she will ask for 2 months or more than what is fair. She left me a message today "come pay for the parking space youy have used every afternoon".

Please let me know what is the ethical thing to do. I am moving this weekend hopefully. Broke as hell. I don't want to be unethical but I also don't want to have someone else take advantage of me. I know the day we told her it was no longer used. I have to pay until that day right?? I mean we should have told her right away, and I won't lose serenity over 30 bucks. Or what would you do?

Jadmack25 10-28-2010 03:03 AM

OK, for me I would pay up to when I told her it wasn't being used. If she wants more, tell her you don't have it and can't give what you don't have.

naive 10-28-2010 03:17 AM

hi tc-

it depends what your agreement was when you leased it from her.

at a minimum, you would be obligated to pay until you informed her.

however, if you signed a six month lease or something, then you would be responsible for the duration of the lease.

perhaps your lease states a two week notice of intent to vacate?

my other question is WHO leased the spot? you or S? if it was the boyfriend, then the obligation is his, not yours.

naive

MMkM 10-28-2010 06:34 AM

Mention the people (and even the policeman) who can attest to it being unused.

Ethically if you had used it you would owe it - and you know you did not so you don't.

Be polite but firm on insisting this was not in use and you are not paying. Maybe even a written letter with all the details would be a good idea to send to them. And an insistance that you will not pay for parking you did not use.

HoopNinja 10-28-2010 08:11 AM

I think naive has a good point. Was there an official lease and who signed it? Was there a clause to end the lease and the conditions. Was the agreement in writing or verbal?

suki44883 10-28-2010 08:20 AM

An agreement is an agreement. If you signed on to rent the space for a certain period of time, you owe the money even though it wasn't used for part of that time. The space was unavailable for anyone else to use, so it was reserved for you even if you didn't use it.

NYC_Chick 10-28-2010 08:45 AM

A deal is a deal. Yor neglect in telling her should not be a loss to her. Put yourself in her shoes. She was unable to make a profit off the space while you were in possession.

Freedom1990 10-28-2010 08:53 AM

My personal opinion?

It was your responsibility to let the person who was renting it to you know that you were no longer using it.

Like Suki said, that space was no longer being used, and was not available to anyone else either to pay rent on.

I couldn't in good conscience argue that I wasn't responsible for anymore payment after the 15th because I did not notify the renter.

Let me share a recent experience with you. I bought two ceiling fans on sale at Walmart a couple of months ago, plus some other odds and ends.

I had a young man for a cashier, seemed to be fairly new.

As soon as he totaled the purchases, I knew immediately that he had only charged me for one fan, and that was an extra $50 in my pocket if I wanted to be less than honest in the situation.

I could have walked out of there not saying a word. It wouldn't even have come out of his pocket because the 2nd fan was never scanned. I was unloading stuff out of the cart when he came around with the portable scanner, so I had no idea he had only done one till the purchase was rung up.

I told him to look at the receipt, that I had 2 fans, not 1, and he looked embarrassed. He thought the fans side by side in the shopping cart were one fan.

He added the second fan.

I walked out of there feeling good about myself because I know I did the right thing.

NYC_Chick 10-28-2010 11:20 AM

Freedom: oddly, the same thing happened to my friend the other night. She went suit shopping for a big interview. The salesperson did not ring up one of her suits. That was Monday night. She is debating whether to go pay for it or keep it, even polling several friends. She got laid off from her job this morning. Suit karma? Maybe. I hope she does the right thing and gets rid of that negative energy. Running from your responsibility and basic honesty will always follow you.

Freedom1990 10-28-2010 11:29 AM

NYC, I hope she does the right thing too.

I knew if I didn't speak up, that would always weigh on my mind, even more so when I shopped at Walmart in the future.

You can't go wrong if you just do the next right thing. :)

Thumper 10-28-2010 11:58 AM


Originally Posted by Freedom1990 (Post 2749834)
You can't go wrong if you just do the next right thing. :)

There you have it. So simple.

I too would pay up until the day (or end of the week) you told her about no longer needing it.

Freedom - I've had to go back into Walmart to pay for two pumpkins that were under my cart that didn't get paid for.

TakingCharge999 10-28-2010 12:04 PM

Thanks! yes, that's fair. No lease, I paid by the month. I have all my receipts that state I started using it a #12th and always paid around the #12th.

I recall I notified her Friday 15th so its 1 month and 3 days. No sweat. That is a codie thing of mine. Postpone. Assume others read my mind. It was S who was not sure if he was going to pay it or not so he could visit me... so I didn't know right away if we were going to keep it or not. And so the days went on.

That is fair. What I don't like is when ppl try to get more than what is fair. I am bad at confrontation. I suspect she will say it was no day #12, but the whole month, and so I owe 1 month and a half, for instance.

In another note she said "you need to pay September and October". So not sure what she is thinking??



Yes, one has to be honest, the other day in the bank the woman infront of me dropped some bills it seems, because I just saw them lying there. I lifted them and the thought crossed my mind "you REALLY need those bucks". But it was brief and I gave them back and felt great! the temptation comes now because hopefully I will leave this weekend and given I will be paying 2 rents for a month or so, I really really need those 30 bucks. Guess if I was in a better situation I wouldn't think it as a big deal.

In fact today, I don't even have those 30 bucks. I'll just go and mention what I'm willing to pay and when I can pay. Thanks for all your input.

HoopNinja 10-28-2010 12:21 PM

TC sometimes that is all you can do is make some sort of arrangement. I think in this economy people are happy when you make arrangements to pay. It shows that you are being responsible. It is somewhat humbling to admit you don't have the money--but it is also a great feeling about humanity when they say--that's fine. Pay when you can. I had the happen to me recently. Took me 4 months to pay off a bill that was not huge but there just was very little money left at the end of each paycheck. Just wrote them the final payment last week. It felt good to be done paying it and I sent a note thanking them again for understanding my financial situation.

Freedom1990 10-28-2010 12:28 PM


Originally Posted by Thumper (Post 2749866)
Freedom - I've had to go back into Walmart to pay for two pumpkins that were under my cart that didn't get paid for.

I had that happen to me at PetSmart! I had 120 pounds of dog food and assorted odds and ends in the cart. When I got out to the car and was putting the dog food in the trunk, I found a dog toy that had gotten buried at the bottom of the cart. I went back in with the toy and paid for it. :)

TakingCharge999 10-28-2010 12:58 PM

The world needs more people like us!! LOL

TakingCharge999 10-28-2010 09:32 PM

The woman came, she asked for one month, I said yes, told S I had to pay that due to his indecision, he offered to pay it. I said half and half because I also put it off.

Thanks all for your input!!


All times are GMT -7. The time now is 04:28 PM.