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Serious Physical Reaction to Confrontation

Old 10-20-2010, 12:47 PM
  # 21 (permalink)  
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I thinks you'll like it here, we're all here to help each other
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Old 10-20-2010, 04:23 PM
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EASY DOES IT AL ANON slogan: It means slow down our pace, to lighten up on ourselves and others, to take on only as much as we can handle, and to remain calm in the face of crises--real or imagined...

ummm, for you ...I love all the slogans, check out my blog, i posted up many ALSO the SERENITY PRAYER, they give good explainations on how to use them day after day....

god bless
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Old 10-21-2010, 09:49 AM
  # 23 (permalink)  
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I remember seeing a book called Decide to Decide....and I thought to myself Decide! It took awhile. I think reading the Alanon pamphlet Merry-Go-Round helped me. I got tired of the going round and round and I was the only one willing to work on the marriage. XAH just wanted to "use" and party and drink and drug with his immature druggie friends. I was in recovery and it was strange that friends, therapist,boss, all said things to me to gently help me see my reality. I was seeing what I wanted not what it was. One friend said "He's just a drunk!"..My boss said "if your self -esteem was better you would see he isn't good for you." My therapist said "your integrity will get you out." My friend (male in recovery) "he's not good for you."(DUH)..Another in recovery (male) said he has "other issues" too....(porn). An old girlfriend said "you are just lonely." Another "you don't deserve to be treated like that." Nobody said the same thing. Another friend "he's using you." Another since I was in recovery "you have to get away from him"....actually two oldtimers said that. I slowly let go and let God. I decided to decide. I took the action. I just celebrated 6 yrs. clean and sober. He is losing his house and is still using. I heard in SR "let go or be dragged." I am not dragged anymore.DENIAL....don't even know I Am Lying. I got out of denial....gave up the fantisy...he wasn't prince charming.....I wasn't happy. I was scared, pissed, angry and frustrated. I worked the program I wished he would work. I got better.
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Old 10-21-2010, 08:01 PM
  # 24 (permalink)  
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I know exactly what you mean, SteppingUp. My body can shake so violently in confrontation that I can hardly spit words out.

It's just since I started this recent bout of self-exploration that I realized I've been having panic attacks since I was a child. I had NO idea. My parents told me I was hyperventilating, and had me breathe in a bag. Didn't help!
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Old 10-22-2010, 07:46 AM
  # 25 (permalink)  
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It's pretty amazing. A little clarity now seems to shine a light on our entire past.

This board and Al Anon are the first things to ever bring these traits into focus for me.

Each little step brings us closer to the place we want to be and one step away from the past that never worked anyway.
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Old 10-22-2010, 10:24 PM
  # 26 (permalink)  
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I suffered from crippling panic attacks for a while. When I feel one coming on I take something. They are a physical manifestation of the stress I was under. It is that fight or flight response, natures way of telling us there is danger ahead (like a sabertooth tiger headed towards us). The primitive part of your brain which reacts to stressors sees stress as stress, can't tell if it is a bear attack or something emotional. All it picks up is 'stresss! better kick up the heart rate and breathing so that I can escape this dangerous situation'. Now we not longer react to wild animal attacks (I hope) but other types of stress which trigger that same part of the brain.

Controlling your breathing (taking deeeeep breaths) really helps lessen the symptoms. But yes, they feel awful.
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Old 10-23-2010, 10:13 AM
  # 27 (permalink)  
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Thanks Babyblue. Deep breaths are the ticket. And they can be used in lots of other situations as well!
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