when will i stop the worrying
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Dec 2009
Location: southport merseyside
Posts: 536
when will i stop the worrying
thought i best do my own thread cos im hijacking another one im just worrying a bit about him and i know after all thats happened he dont deserve it cos he could well be drinking with her and having a good time and not even thinking about me but well was reading all the stuff about where this disease is going and what stage he is at and well i dont think its good and am thinking is that why hes got rid of me cos he wants to die and with me that wasnt gonna happen i dunno its just i cant cope when he talks to me but even less when he doesnt cos it worrys me cos he was very ill the last time i saw him in person and i know the drinkings got much worse since he dumped me for this other one whos fun to be with wonder how much fun she will find it when he poops the bed if he hasnt already that is u cant help still loving em eh anyhow im out tonite with some friends and few glasses of wine and why do i feel guilty cos im having a few drinks but i always do feel like that im trying to do things for me now and not stress about what choices he has made but this isnt easy is it
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Join Date: Nov 2002
Location: Bristol TN/VA
Posts: 12,431
He wants to be with someone else. Period.
It doesn't matter whether it is good for him or not, that is what he chose.
Now, it is on you to make choices.
You can choose to stop entertaining thoughts about him, with practice it becomes natural.
I don't know how miserable you have to get before you really want to let go of your addiction to him.
But always calling it because you love him is denial.
It doesn't matter whether it is good for him or not, that is what he chose.
Now, it is on you to make choices.
You can choose to stop entertaining thoughts about him, with practice it becomes natural.
I don't know how miserable you have to get before you really want to let go of your addiction to him.
But always calling it because you love him is denial.
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Join Date: Aug 2010
Location: NJ
Posts: 244
you sound like a really nice girl. Its normal to worry about your ex. But just try to stop thinking about him all the time, try to go out and have some fun. In time it will fade but you have to help the process along. you take care of yourself ok
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Join Date: Nov 2002
Location: Bristol TN/VA
Posts: 12,431
You certainly are.
I still remember vividly when I was told flat out I was in denial.
It shocked me and I didn't think it was all that kind and supportive, BUT, it wound up saving my life.
You've been in the worry mode for awhile.
Living a life carefree...care free of all that mess...where YOU get to be happy and keep all your dignity is priceless.
If you would prefer I not post on your thread, please just tell me, k?
I still remember vividly when I was told flat out I was in denial.
It shocked me and I didn't think it was all that kind and supportive, BUT, it wound up saving my life.
You've been in the worry mode for awhile.
Living a life carefree...care free of all that mess...where YOU get to be happy and keep all your dignity is priceless.
If you would prefer I not post on your thread, please just tell me, k?
You will stop worrying as much when you learn to detach and let go. Your worry will not fix anything, change anything, or make anything better. It will only serve to drain you and leave you feeling worse.
Can I steer you to chapter 5 of Codependent no more? Perhaps read it again if you can. I was a complete messy head today till I read that. Now I am detached again and feel better.
Can I steer you to chapter 5 of Codependent no more? Perhaps read it again if you can. I was a complete messy head today till I read that. Now I am detached again and feel better.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Dec 2009
Location: southport merseyside
Posts: 536
You will stop worrying as much when you learn to detach and let go. Your worry will not fix anything, change anything, or make anything better. It will only serve to drain you and leave you feeling worse.
Can I steer you to chapter 5 of Codependent no more? Perhaps read it again if you can. I was a complete messy head today till I read that. Now I am detached again and feel better.
Can I steer you to chapter 5 of Codependent no more? Perhaps read it again if you can. I was a complete messy head today till I read that. Now I am detached again and feel better.
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