I need to vent again.

Old 09-20-2010, 08:20 AM
  # 1 (permalink)  
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: ft. lauderdale florida
Posts: 275
I need to vent again.

Another letter I will never send to my axbf

I am trying to hate the disease and not you. Eminem sings about recovery I listen to his song a lot. It always makes me cry. It made me go back and listen to a lot of his work and it really touches me. Why do some men care and love so much for their children and you DON"T?
Why dont you fight?
Why doNT you do something?
If it was me a would crawl all the way here just to see him. peek in a window, beg to hold him. How do you sleep at night??????
How do you exist knowing a beautiful little baby boy lives and breathes with out you.
How? Do you hate yourself?
I pray for you. I do . I REALLLY DO. I HOPE YOU FIND YOUR WAY.
I am so torn. I am grateful, You helped give me my son, but angry I had to save him from his own father. You were suppose to protect him!
Instead I stand alone..
Woman Warrior.
Mother Warrior.

Big breathe
Thank you for
wow1323 is offline  
The Following 4 Users Say Thank You to wow1323 For This Useful Post:
chicory (09-22-2010), kellthebelle (09-22-2010), kiki5711 (09-20-2010), transformyself (09-20-2010)
Old 09-20-2010, 09:07 AM
  # 2 (permalink)  
I Love Who I Am
transformyself's Avatar
Join Date: Sep 2009
Location: Midwest
Posts: 3,210
Blog Entries: 2
Keep fighting Momma. Do the next right thing.
transformyself is offline  
Old 09-20-2010, 09:20 AM
  # 3 (permalink)  
kiki5711's Avatar
Join Date: Apr 2010
Posts: 1,288
Blog Entries: 1
You and your son will do JUST fine!!!
kiki5711 is offline  
Old 09-21-2010, 11:17 PM
  # 4 (permalink)  
missb89's Avatar
Join Date: Jul 2010
Posts: 143
Your child may not realize how strong of a momma he has yet, but he will. It takes a lot to put our love, and wants aside, and do the best thing that we possibly can for our children. I commend you on being strong, and wish you the best.
missb89 is offline  
Old 09-22-2010, 05:22 AM
  # 5 (permalink)  
JenT1968's Avatar
Join Date: May 2006
Location: UK
Posts: 1,149
Blog Entries: 1
Hi there lovely,

I understand your anger,
I don't know if this will help you; I too just couldn't get how stbxAH could let his kids down so continuously, not put them first, not step up and become a consistent father.

It is evident that my stbx has great overwhelming, powerful feelings of love towards his children. He also wants the absolute best for them. What he is not able to do consistently is translate those feelings into the loving ACTION they require (turning up sober and on time to see them, fulfilling promises, putting time with them before alcohol etc).

His feelings are not in question but his actions are not effectively linked to them. I don't know if that is an alcohol thing, a personality thing, a FOO thing, a combination, it just is. He loves his children at the very, very, upper limit of his capability to love, he loves them more than anyone or anything else on this planet, I think that is important for them to understand. He can't always translate that into what they need though.

That helped me enormously when I realised it.
JenT1968 is offline  
The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to JenT1968 For This Useful Post:
bookwyrm (09-22-2010), theuncertainty (09-22-2010)
Old 09-22-2010, 06:56 AM
  # 6 (permalink)  
chicory's Avatar
Join Date: Jul 2010
Posts: 13,051
Blog Entries: 1
Your love for that little boy is beautiful. You would do anything for him, that is easy to see.

I am sorry for your heartache. His father does not even realize what he is missing. But thank God, your son has a most wonderful mama.

Perhaps his father knows that he has nothing to offer, since he is still lost in his sickness. This disease robs people of their love, life, joy, peace- of every good thing. It has robbed him of his son, and I hope that some day soon, he will fight back, and get a life where he may have something to offer his son. But we can't make that happen. We cant control a thing. Just what we do with what we have been given.

You are blessed , even tho it is tough for you, you have a treasure.
You are strong, and I admire you so much, wow.

big hugs,
chicory is offline  

Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are Off

All times are GMT -7. The time now is 11:19 PM.