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Have a great birthday!! I used to be chronically disappointed in my birthdays, but that was mostly the result of having unrealistic expectations. Once I dropped the expectations, they got a whole lot better! Birthday hugs, |
Kassie, I agree with Lexiecat. When I dropped my expectations about my b'day celebrations, and just opened up to the possibilites, good things happen. Be open to the good things, like a wiener dog on a bun! And cinnamon rolls! Special coffee, this sounds like something I would do for myself. You will have a great day! :ghug3 Beth |
i want that little weiner dog!!! |
:bday7 :day :bday2 Happy Birthday Kassie - although it may not be what you planned ~ remember you are on the path with your HP ~ praying HE gives you special blessing today to let you know you are beautiful, special and LOVED!!! PINK HUGS! Rita |
HAPPY BIRTHDAY KASSIE!!! Even if your life isn't right where you want it now, that's another year survived, the pain that you went through during that time doesn't have to be lived through again, because you are making different, better choices for your future. aniversaries, holidays and birthdays can be times of reflection, they are not always times of unadulterated joy. There is benefit to that reflection and acknowledging sadness and perhaps regrets, but I hope you've squeezed a little happiness in there too :) |
well here goes the day.... traffic on the way in - very good!, on the way home I suspected every other car to be intox by the way they were driving all over the place! When I got to work - I found out I left my cell phone at home. So the calls from my kids would have to wait. Once home, it wasn't there and I had to go on a hunt - found it in the car - don''t know how that happened?! Work was ok. My supervisor was upset when she found out it was my BD and I was at work and sent me home ( it already 3pm). My husband ignored me - would not have eye contact and left early. I want to know on what universe or planet someone ignores you on your BD?! I gave him a card for his and he thanked me for it then. But how do you ignore someone you are married to, have an office next door to at work, and not say HBD or give a card in return. Some acknowledgment! He has always been a tit for tat sort of person including doing nice things so I thought he might give me a card or say something nice. I know about expectations - but he is usually very predictable and I wasn't sure how I would feel or react. I am venting here so that I do not call him instead to whine. I am hurt, not b/c of this but for everything. I just want to know what kind of person does this or what is wrong with him that he can't do something normal that everyone knows to do! OK, better. I can not tell everyone how special you allowed me to feel from all the good wishes! All very heartful and I got that. I did not have any expectations beyond what I said for today - I planned to go through it and see what happens. It was really mostly ordinary except for the amazing posts here! Enough to brighten and encourage! Being alone, I partly start to reminesce - my BD growing up were usually the first day of school - for me getting out of my house was a pleasant experience and escape from the chaos. As an adult - I did what I could - sometimes my expectations to make up for lost time got in the way, but mostly they were ok. Never what I dreamed of but then life doesn't look like the tv or movie scripts. I am ok and that is important. Reading a few posts, I appreciate everyone taking the time to make me feel special for a day. I especially want to thank those who shared their challenges as it always reminds me of my blessings - the first one being that I am never really alone in this journey. Tonight will be restful. I don't have to eat healthy today but I really like what I am having! Tommorrow is another day -(I think that is in someone's script ha ha) Things will go back to normal as normal is. Thank you for sharing this day with me. I love it and it made me feel just I needed to feel for one day - special. Thanks for recognizing that one. |
I just want to know what kind of person does this or what is wrong with him that he can't do something normal that everyone knows to do! :a122: |
Not funny but probably true. |
Sorry Kassie, I was still thinking about one of the last threads I read. Please don't take his behavior, actions or non-actions, personally. I just got done telling my Mom the same thing this past week: Their behavior has nothing to do with whether or not they care about you or love you. Caring and love are feelings, and their alcoholic behavior has nothing to do with that. |
L2L- I understood that. My husband has made it clear that feelings don't change - and he is done with the relationship b/c despite the fact that we love each other it is not enough to make it work. DUH! when did alcohol AND relationships work together?! But he doesn't see that ! I find it irritating and aggravating and just plain stupid at times! The more I learn about his alcoholism, the more I understand that he just doesn't have any control. I find it very sad, my kids find it confusing, and others just plain don't want to hear it. Glad I can talk here. |
I have been DONE WITH each of my EXes at a certain point, but would keep hanging on and perservering for this reason and that reason or some other reason. Hurting, crying, trying, begging, whatever. It is WEIRD looking back on this because I do not understand why I could not just let go. It was like I was being electrocuted and couldn't let go of my grip. It's like my brain needs time to catch up with what I had already decided. At some point I realized, "Sheesh! You were done with him, why did you keep hanging on?" |
L2L - sometimes it is a problem and sometimes it is just recognizing that when we connect with someone - it is forever on some level. Doesn't mean it has to be anything more than it is at a given moment. Connections are biological and spiritual. We can end how much time we spend together, how will we interact, how much distance we will permit - but it is there. Obviously we make some connections that don't serve us well and a correction is needed but the connection is never severed - it is only corrected. IDK if that makes any sense - it is a belief I have and usually serves me well. For some reason I am obviously not figuring this one out so well. |
Iyanla VanZant says that people come into our lives for a Reason, a Season, or a Lifetime. |
Happy Bday Kassie, just remember these events are just days on the calendar. Celebrate whenever you feel like it. Doesnt have to be some special day determined by Hallmark. Think of something you are grateful for like having work to go to or the weather or your favorite food. An attitude of gratitude as they say.:bday7 |
Kassie, this year's BDAY sucked for me. I don't like BDAYS or set days where you have to feel something. I know in other cultures biological bdays are not celebrated - its more like in SR, that you outgrow a name and chose maybe a different nickname, because its a new you - THAT is a real birthday! I only went out with a guy and didn't marry or have kids or anything and I also see the ex at the office. I can only imagine how difficult it would be for you if he is your husband and have no acknowledgement or anything. Yesterday I quarreled with current BF, because for my BDAY he didn't do much for me, and today its his bday - I'm supposedly dressing nice and going to dinner and forget my own plans. And I say, why am I willing to give so much of myself and not receive even half of it? UGH. Anyway, I agree with the posters in that, every day we get the chance to demonstrate love for ourselves. We have to do that with actions... In fact every day we can choose to give birth to another version of ourselves... that is a real gift! to realize no one else is more special than us, no day is more special than others, every single moment in life is precious. Hope you find more ways to pamper yourself anytime! no reason needed, just because Kassie is Kassie, and its enough. :) |
Kassie!!!!! :a122::bday7:bbj Happy Birthday, girlie! This day is to celebrate YOU! and the sweet person you are. Do not let any yukhead make you feel less loved than you are. His actions do not say anything about you, and who you are. Just feel the hugs, and hear the good wishes, and tell yourself , I am loved, i am loveable, and one of these days.....good things coming, sweetie. will make all the crummy memories fade away... hope that your night is sweet, and that you have some great dreams for your birthday. big birthday hugs! chicory |
I'm not to late..it is still Wednesday! http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v2...irthday/50.gif Hope you find more ways to pamper yourself anytime! |
49 isn't enough? |
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