Justice if for those with money...
Being Silent so I can Hear
Thread Starter
Join Date: Nov 2008
Location: USA
Posts: 2,521
Justice if for those with money...
..unfortunately.
The courts don't care if your spouse took all the money. They don't care if your spouse took the vehicles and left you stranded with no way to get employment.
Lesson: Plan accordingly and take what you plan to have or need with you when you go, or when you remove them from the home. Because if you can't afford legal representation (in some states) the courts WILL judge in the favor of the spouse who can afford it.
The courts don't care if your spouse took all the money. They don't care if your spouse took the vehicles and left you stranded with no way to get employment.
Lesson: Plan accordingly and take what you plan to have or need with you when you go, or when you remove them from the home. Because if you can't afford legal representation (in some states) the courts WILL judge in the favor of the spouse who can afford it.
RIP Sweet Suki
Join Date: Apr 2008
Location: In my sanctuary, my home
Posts: 39,863
Unfortunately, this is true. The courts really do not care. They don't try to be hard-hearted, but they just don't have the time or the inclination to get involved in all the dirty little doings involved in divorce. I know when I divorced my daughter's father, the fact that he was a lying, cheating, uncaring, control freak who literally kicked me out of the house when I was 4 months pregnant didn't enter into it at all. He still ended up with shared custody of our daughter, and his child support payment was a joke. Many, many times, it just isn't fair. I'm so sorry that you were put in the situation you were. Once it's over though, you will be free of him and won't ever have to speak to or in any way deal with him again.
Being Silent so I can Hear
Thread Starter
Join Date: Nov 2008
Location: USA
Posts: 2,521
Everything I own, is gone. Everything I worked for, planned for, paid for...gone.
I have no home, no vehicle, no savings, no money.
But, I do have a live free of an insane drunk (soon).
I have no home, no vehicle, no savings, no money.
But, I do have a live free of an insane drunk (soon).
I'm no angel!
Join Date: May 2005
Location: tampa, fl
Posts: 6,728
Thats why I always kept everything in my name, never comingled, still cost me a few bucks, but I survived.
I am so sorry that you are going through this, yet, I know that you will be ok.
Sending hugs!
I am so sorry that you are going through this, yet, I know that you will be ok.
Sending hugs!
Member
Join Date: Nov 2008
Location: back from the brink
Posts: 457
Well, I too suffered financially. He got plenty, and didn't deserve a dime. He deserved fines and poverty... but walked away with a bundle.
BUT... he didn't get ME! Will never have ME again. I'm one of a kind ... so he's not so well off. Nor is your X!!!!!!!
I might add that 8 months after receiving his money - he's spent it ALL. It's GONE.
Meanwhile, I am saving once again, and slowly-but-surely getting back my life. You can too!
BUT... he didn't get ME! Will never have ME again. I'm one of a kind ... so he's not so well off. Nor is your X!!!!!!!
I might add that 8 months after receiving his money - he's spent it ALL. It's GONE.
Meanwhile, I am saving once again, and slowly-but-surely getting back my life. You can too!
Member
Join Date: Nov 2002
Location: Bristol TN/VA
Posts: 12,431
Still Waters, damn..I am so sorry. It's so disheartening.
I worked and paid the living expenses and put a significant portion of his earnings in his employee 401K and in an employee savings plan.
Everything went to him.
The judge gave me his stereo....and the beat-up old car that wouldn't run and wasn't worth fixing...if I had even had the money to fix it.
and that was it.
At least I knew it was because he was related to the judge and the county is known as corrupt.
It's so very unfair and divorces can't be appealed.
Just rotten in Denmark!
How can they sleep at night?!
I kept wondering?
hugs
I worked and paid the living expenses and put a significant portion of his earnings in his employee 401K and in an employee savings plan.
Everything went to him.
The judge gave me his stereo....and the beat-up old car that wouldn't run and wasn't worth fixing...if I had even had the money to fix it.
and that was it.
At least I knew it was because he was related to the judge and the county is known as corrupt.
It's so very unfair and divorces can't be appealed.
Just rotten in Denmark!
How can they sleep at night?!
I kept wondering?
hugs
I'm no angel!
Join Date: May 2005
Location: tampa, fl
Posts: 6,728
Live, I wonder too...it seems that they have no concious. As a former codie ( I was registered in the state of Florida as a card carrying codie) I wanted to help, I never wanted to see my exabf on the street or without money....that was then, now, it's each man for themselves. I care about others, however, I now care for myself, too.
The court system doesn't give a tinkers d+mn about who gets what in a divorce or how one is going to survive. The legal ceramony of marriage is just a business agreement, the church service covers the vows end of it. When one is divorcing it is all about settling the monatary aspects of the relationship. That is why I will never marry again, why should I? I am way past the child bearing age, and really today in 2010 who cares if I am married or not. The answer, to me is...no one.
The court system doesn't give a tinkers d+mn about who gets what in a divorce or how one is going to survive. The legal ceramony of marriage is just a business agreement, the church service covers the vows end of it. When one is divorcing it is all about settling the monatary aspects of the relationship. That is why I will never marry again, why should I? I am way past the child bearing age, and really today in 2010 who cares if I am married or not. The answer, to me is...no one.
Being Silent so I can Hear
Thread Starter
Join Date: Nov 2008
Location: USA
Posts: 2,521
Originally Posted by Live 
Still Waters, damn..I am so sorry. It's so disheartening.
I worked and paid the living expenses and put a significant portion of his earnings in his employee 401K and in an employee savings plan.
Everything went to him.
The judge gave me his stereo....and the beat-up old car that wouldn't run and wasn't worth fixing...if I had even had the money to fix it.
and that was it.
At least I knew it was because he was related to the judge and the county is known as corrupt.
It's so very unfair and divorces can't be appealed.
Just rotten in Denmark!
How can they sleep at night?!
I kept wondering?
hugs
I worked and paid the living expenses and put a significant portion of his earnings in his employee 401K and in an employee savings plan.
Everything went to him.
The judge gave me his stereo....and the beat-up old car that wouldn't run and wasn't worth fixing...if I had even had the money to fix it.
and that was it.
At least I knew it was because he was related to the judge and the county is known as corrupt.
It's so very unfair and divorces can't be appealed.
Just rotten in Denmark!
How can they sleep at night?!
I kept wondering?
hugs
But hey, I got to use my food stamps today, when I got a ride to the grocery store. :/
Being Silent so I can Hear
Thread Starter
Join Date: Nov 2008
Location: USA
Posts: 2,521
Originally Posted by dollydo
Live, I wonder too...it seems that they have no concious. As a former codie ( I was registered in the state of Florida as a card carrying codie) I wanted to help, I never wanted to see my exabf on the street or without money....that was then, now, it's each man for themselves. I care about others, however, I now care for myself, too.
The court system doesn't give a tinkers d+mn about who gets what in a divorce or how one is going to survive. The legal ceramony of marriage is just a business agreement, the church service covers the vows end of it. When one is divorcing it is all about settling the monatary aspects of the relationship. That is why I will never marry again, why should I? I am way past the child bearing age, and really today in 2010 who cares if I am married or not. The answer, to me is...no one.
The court system doesn't give a tinkers d+mn about who gets what in a divorce or how one is going to survive. The legal ceramony of marriage is just a business agreement, the church service covers the vows end of it. When one is divorcing it is all about settling the monatary aspects of the relationship. That is why I will never marry again, why should I? I am way past the child bearing age, and really today in 2010 who cares if I am married or not. The answer, to me is...no one.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2010
Posts: 103
Originally Posted by Still Waters
Everything I own, is gone. Everything I worked for, planned for, paid for...gone.
I have no home, no vehicle, no savings, no money.
But, I do have a live free of an insane drunk (soon).
I have no home, no vehicle, no savings, no money.
But, I do have a live free of an insane drunk (soon).
You still OWN your dignity, your self-respect, your right to choose, your mind, your heart and your soul!
No court of law, no man or woman can take that away from you.
A jug fills drop by drop
Join Date: Nov 2008
Posts: 6,784
What you have lost was not so valuable after all, that is why it was lost.
What is really valuable can never be lost.
Please let us help and open a savings account, share the international code for deposits and I'll go Monday to deposit an amount of $. I know other posters won't mind to send you a few bucks and will do it gladly, because when we have gone through a tough situation there has been someone who lends a helping hand. And this time it may be our turn. It may help for something, and the most important thing, you'll remember many people support you and want the best for you. No one is going to think less of you, if that is what worries you. I offer this with heartfelt respect.
What is really valuable can never be lost.
Please let us help and open a savings account, share the international code for deposits and I'll go Monday to deposit an amount of $. I know other posters won't mind to send you a few bucks and will do it gladly, because when we have gone through a tough situation there has been someone who lends a helping hand. And this time it may be our turn. It may help for something, and the most important thing, you'll remember many people support you and want the best for you. No one is going to think less of you, if that is what worries you. I offer this with heartfelt respect.
Member
Join Date: May 2009
Location: Land of Cotton
Posts: 3,433
Originally Posted by TakingCharge999
Please let us help and open a savings account, share the international code for deposits and I'll go Monday to deposit an amount of $. I know other posters won't mind to send you a few bucks and will do it gladly.
Being Silent so I can Hear
Thread Starter
Join Date: Nov 2008
Location: USA
Posts: 2,521
Originally Posted by TakingCharge999
What you have lost was not so valuable after all, that is why it was lost.
What is really valuable can never be lost.
Please let us help and open a savings account, share the international code for deposits and I'll go Monday to deposit an amount of $. I know other posters won't mind to send you a few bucks and will do it gladly, because when we have gone through a tough situation there has been someone who lends a helping hand. And this time it may be our turn. It may help for something, and the most important thing, you'll remember many people support you and want the best for you. No one is going to think less of you, if that is what worries you. I offer this with heartfelt respect.
What is really valuable can never be lost.
Please let us help and open a savings account, share the international code for deposits and I'll go Monday to deposit an amount of $. I know other posters won't mind to send you a few bucks and will do it gladly, because when we have gone through a tough situation there has been someone who lends a helping hand. And this time it may be our turn. It may help for something, and the most important thing, you'll remember many people support you and want the best for you. No one is going to think less of you, if that is what worries you. I offer this with heartfelt respect.
But, I'll manage to get by. I'm okay day to day - I mean I have food and shelter. I just couldn't afford to travel out of state. The bus companies don't take food stamps for their fares..If it weren't for people lending a helping hand, I'd be in a shelter for the homeless. My rent is very low, even for one room. And I'm able to borrow a car mostly when I need to, to get my daughter to practice and to get to the grocery store. I just wasn't able to borrow it to go out of state, as the owner of the car needs it to get back and forth to work.
Right now my immediate issue is this computer of mine. I'm having a problem with it, which makes it impossible for me to work. So, I'd better get back to trying to fix it.
Big hugs TC, you made me feel understood and appreciated and loved. Thank you.
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