whereisthisgoin

I am amazed at divorce lawyer hourly fees.

I'm curious - how many lawyer hours did you, or have you so far, racked up while going through divorce?

I know there will be more hours if it gets nasty - I was just curious to hear the voices of different experiences.

LexieCat

My first divorce was completely amicable, and fees were minimal. His lawyers drafted the agreement we had worked out, my lawyer reviewed it and made a couple of minor changes, done.

Second one I handled myself (no kids, brief marriage, minimal assets, minimal debt).

But yes, the fees can get HUGE if it gets ugly.

My own suggestions are these (I'm a lawyer, not a divorce lawyer, but I had to spend a lot of time in family court with people going through divorces):

Pick your battles carefully. If it doesn't matter who wins a particular issue, let it go (if it's contentious, hold it as a negotiating chip, but don't fight over anything as a matter of "principle"--principle gets expensive fast). You don't get "points" for how many issues you "win".

Tell your lawyer what you would LIKE, and what you will settle for--your absolute bottom line. If he or she is a good negotiator, that will help resolve things faster.

Mediation is cheaper than court if both parties are reasonable and there is no actual abuse involved.

If there are only a few issues that are seriously in dispute, agree on the rest, and negotiate or litigate only what's really in dispute.

Where divorce gets really expensive is when both parties feel the need to feel like they "won". Usually if each party feels somewhat satisfied, though not happy with the entire result, the resolution is fair.

I gave up my "rights" to quite a few things for the sake of freedom and peace of mind, and a reasonable legal bill. To me, that was a win.

Of course, if one of the parties wants to make life a living hell for the other in court, and doesn't care how much he or she spends in the process, that's something that will rack up hours and fees.

Incidentally, unless you have a spouse of the type that is out to destroy you, you are better off with a lawyer who is a good negotiator than one who is a pit bull. Pit bulls instinctively make everything into a battle and it costs YOU money. It's worth making sure, when you hire a lawyer, to be sure you are on the same page in terms of how aggressive you want him or her to be. The more aggressive, the more it will cost you.

Jazzman

What Lexie said. Plus, don't use a lawyer as a counselor at $300/hr. Keep it all business, come with prepared written questions and write down the answers. All states have a lot of domestic law info on their court related website and you can do a lot of free research there. My first divorce was amicable and went just like Lexies, that one was cheap. My second divorce was a fight and very expensive. I intentionally went with a pit bull and did my best at managing her aggressive tactics.

Still Waters

Zero. They all charge 100's of times what I make an hour, which means there is no way I can afford one.

whereisthisgoin

Do you remember approx. how many hours of legal fees you had to pay?

LexieCat

I know what you're asking, but I don't think anyone else's experience can give you even a rough idea. It depends on how many issues you have, how complicated your situation is. For example, if one or both of you own a business, that is far more complicated than if you each have jobs with employers. Some issues are pretty cut-and-dried, others will require significant legal research. If your situation falls into a legal grey area, it will require more time than one where the law is settled.

When you meet with your lawyer, he or she MAY be able to give you an idea of how many hours they think your situation will entail. This will be a VERY rough estimate, but probably more accurate than people here telling you how many hours they paid for.

suki44883

There's really no way for us to answer your question. Everyone's situation is different, like Lexie says. I will say that in my last divorce, my ex had to pay my attorney's fees.

LexieCat

True. Divorce litigation can include awarding of attorney's fees. Discuss that with your lawyer.

whereisthisgoin

I think it would - I hope others reply. I would like to know.

suki44883

Not only do hours differ, but rates differ, too. Some attorneys charge $300 an hour while some charge half that. It just depends on too many factors to be able to give you even a ballpark figure. This question would best be posed to your attorney, if you have one.

Edit to add: Much of it depends on how amicable the two of you are. If you can come up with something that works for both of you before filing, that will help a lot with the cost. Just remember...every phone call is billed, whether it's with you or your husband's attorney. Every time the attorney has to do any little thing or even open the file on your case, it is billed. It can turn into a great deal of money.

RollTide

Mine was very reasonable. I spent 45 minutes or so with my attorney and asked if he could have it typed up immediately. He had his secretary type it while I sat and cried. I signed then and there and took my XAH a copy and asked him to go by the attorney's office and sign and it would cost him nothing. I knew that if I blinked that I would back out. After a few drunk episodes that culminated in me looking out the door to see him peeing in my driveway and me threatening a restraining order he signed. There was no dispute over property. I still love him but thank goodness I don't have to live like that anymore.

Learn2Live

Good God, can someone please tell me, what is the purpose of getting married? So that when the man in my life decides he is going to be drunk or stoned every day, steal my peace and serenity, and be a royal pain in my a$$, or worse off not work and pay his fair share, and/or have sex with more people than just me, I have to then PAY someone with a law degree to fight for me in front of another, more powerful lawyer who has been a lawyer for much longer than my lawyer, who will decide how much of MY stuff and MY money I have to give to this guy?

So society creates this thing you can sign up for (marriage) so that society can rule my life? And society keeps trying to convince me that there is something bad or wrong with me if I continue to have sex with someone who I do not enter into this arrangement with? Can someone please tell me what am I not getting here?

What the hell is marriage anyway? What is the BENEFIT of me entering into this arrangement voluntarily? I'm sorry if I am being negative and/or stupid but I just don't GET it. What exactly am I missing here that everyone else seems to just LOVE to sign up for?

Thanks. I can post a new thread whereisthisgoing if you want me to.

RollTide

Learn2Live: "What the hell is marriage anyway?"

And my next question is exactly what the hell is love, too? Along with, "What was I thinking?"

Learn2Live

I think I know what you mean. I'm beginning to think that "love" is just another one of those hooks. And just another way to keep you stuck in something you don't really want to be stuck in. Maybe I am just a cynical old spinster but when someone says "I love you" I think they are trying to trick me.

RollTide

I think I have also BECOME a cynical old spinster as a result of living with an alcoholic.

whereisthisgoin

My question is hour many lawyer hours did it take or has it taken so far for a person's divorce?

I'm not asking about rate at all.

It's a simple question, really.

RollTide

Sorry to hijack the thread. It was only a couple of hours for me. The initial time with the attorney and then filing the paperwith with the court.

suki44883

No, it really isn't a simple question. As several of us have said, the hours can vary greatly depending on how contentious the divorce is. Good luck finding the answer you are looking for.

Learn2Live

I think my BF's divorce was about 100 hours. He and the ex could not communicate at all and it was very contentious.

Learn2Live

The Word of the Day appears to be ...

LOL