It's a heartache...
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Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: Waterford MI
Posts: 4,202
I have been taking Effexor for months.
It has really improved my life. I took Prozac for a long time, it worked for awhile then it stopped.
But, my appetite has decreased, and I look much better for it.
In between the effexor, vitamin d and fish oil, at the rate i am going, i will be ten years younger by Christmas.
LOL
Yeah, anti-depressants arent for everyone, but when you find the right one, well, life is good.
Beth
It has really improved my life. I took Prozac for a long time, it worked for awhile then it stopped.
But, my appetite has decreased, and I look much better for it.
In between the effexor, vitamin d and fish oil, at the rate i am going, i will be ten years younger by Christmas.
LOL
Yeah, anti-depressants arent for everyone, but when you find the right one, well, life is good.
Beth
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2010
Location: Virginia
Posts: 685
If anyone is wealthy enough, you should drink XanGo! It is AMAZING. I cannot say it enough!
The symptoms of my lymes disease and chronic neck pain have nearly vanished all together!
I'm shocked when people do well on prozac. That stuff made me CRAZY. I'd scream, yell, lash out, break and throw objects... not a good pill in my mind. I don't really understand the connection between anti-depressants and weight gain. If you have lower levels of serotonin... and then increase them, I would think that you'd have less of an appetite.
Perhaps for those who gain.. it could be thyroid, or otherwise related. Who knows? Not me.
The symptoms of my lymes disease and chronic neck pain have nearly vanished all together!
I'm shocked when people do well on prozac. That stuff made me CRAZY. I'd scream, yell, lash out, break and throw objects... not a good pill in my mind. I don't really understand the connection between anti-depressants and weight gain. If you have lower levels of serotonin... and then increase them, I would think that you'd have less of an appetite.
Perhaps for those who gain.. it could be thyroid, or otherwise related. Who knows? Not me.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2010
Location: Virginia
Posts: 685
My crazy boss is a distributor of it (only way you can get it) and he's done nothing but talk about it FOREVER.
FINALLY, I started it, along with eleviv... and I am amazed at how my pain has vanished within a month.
The thing is.. it's $40 a bottle, which lasts a week. You drink about 3-6oz a day. It has been INCREDIBLE! Whether it's a placebo effect or not, I never want to stop lol.
It comes from the fruit Mangosteen, which is in Asia. It cannot be imported to the US.
Here's a brief introduction... you can google XanGo or Eleviv, and lots will pop up. I was a HUGE skeptic, but I truly notice a huge difference in just a month.
Mangosteen and Arthritis – How does Mangosteen Help with Arthritis?
FINALLY, I started it, along with eleviv... and I am amazed at how my pain has vanished within a month.
The thing is.. it's $40 a bottle, which lasts a week. You drink about 3-6oz a day. It has been INCREDIBLE! Whether it's a placebo effect or not, I never want to stop lol.
It comes from the fruit Mangosteen, which is in Asia. It cannot be imported to the US.
Here's a brief introduction... you can google XanGo or Eleviv, and lots will pop up. I was a HUGE skeptic, but I truly notice a huge difference in just a month.
Mangosteen and Arthritis – How does Mangosteen Help with Arthritis?
Member
Join Date: Feb 2010
Location: Georgia
Posts: 31
Originally Posted by Jenny1232 
Some anti-depressants can cause weight loss. Correct me if I am wrong, but for people with eating disorders (say bulimia) have a lower level of serotonin, and taking an SSRI can balance their levels out, causing them NOT to overeat. I believe there is a link between anorexics and a higher level of serotonin, causing them to eat less. I could totally be wrong, but I recall reading that a long time ago.
I was on lexapro for almost a year, and my weight was stable, as were my eating habits. Everyone is different.. it's finding the right fit.. or maybe it wasn't needed to begin with?
They say birth control causes weight gain - and I never had an issue there either...
I was on lexapro for almost a year, and my weight was stable, as were my eating habits. Everyone is different.. it's finding the right fit.. or maybe it wasn't needed to begin with?
They say birth control causes weight gain - and I never had an issue there either...
To thine own self be true.
Join Date: May 2009
Location: U.S.A.
Posts: 5,924
Wicked said:
Me too. Effexor literally changed my life.
HAHA that was a good one! Thanks for the belly laugh.
I have been taking Effexor for months.
It has really improved my life.
It has really improved my life.
In between the effexor, vitamin d and fish oil, at the rate i am going, i will be ten years younger by Christmas.
Member
Join Date: Feb 2010
Location: Georgia
Posts: 31
[QUOTE=wicked;2677968]I have been taking Effexor for months.
It has really improved my life. I took Prozac for a long time, it worked for awhile then it stopped.
But, my appetite has decreased, and I look much better for it.
In between the effexor, vitamin d and fish oil, at the rate i am going, i will be ten years younger by Christmas.
LOL
Yeah, anti-depressants arent for everyone, but when you find the right one, well, life is good.
If ever I have to go off my Gingko Biloba and St Johns Wart I will ask for Effexor (writing myself a note in my address book right now under Dr). Thanks for this... I also take vitamin d,fish oil,calcium,multi vitamin and was also taking vitamin E until I had surgery on both feet and was told by the dr to stop, when I asked why he said it slows down healing...I was shocked because a friend of mine got me taking it, she said it is good for your skin. Thanks!
It has really improved my life. I took Prozac for a long time, it worked for awhile then it stopped.
But, my appetite has decreased, and I look much better for it.
In between the effexor, vitamin d and fish oil, at the rate i am going, i will be ten years younger by Christmas.
LOL
Yeah, anti-depressants arent for everyone, but when you find the right one, well, life is good.
If ever I have to go off my Gingko Biloba and St Johns Wart I will ask for Effexor (writing myself a note in my address book right now under Dr). Thanks for this... I also take vitamin d,fish oil,calcium,multi vitamin and was also taking vitamin E until I had surgery on both feet and was told by the dr to stop, when I asked why he said it slows down healing...I was shocked because a friend of mine got me taking it, she said it is good for your skin. Thanks!
Member
Join Date: Feb 2010
Location: Georgia
Posts: 31
Originally Posted by Jenny1232
If anyone is wealthy enough, you should drink XanGo! It is AMAZING. I cannot say it enough!
The symptoms of my lymes disease and chronic neck pain have nearly vanished all together!
I'm shocked when people do well on prozac. That stuff made me CRAZY. I'd scream, yell, lash out, break and throw objects... not a good pill in my mind. I don't really understand the connection between anti-depressants and weight gain. If you have lower levels of serotonin... and then increase them, I would think that you'd have less of an appetite.
Perhaps for those who gain.. it could be thyroid, or otherwise related. Who knows? Not me.
The symptoms of my lymes disease and chronic neck pain have nearly vanished all together!
I'm shocked when people do well on prozac. That stuff made me CRAZY. I'd scream, yell, lash out, break and throw objects... not a good pill in my mind. I don't really understand the connection between anti-depressants and weight gain. If you have lower levels of serotonin... and then increase them, I would think that you'd have less of an appetite.
Perhaps for those who gain.. it could be thyroid, or otherwise related. Who knows? Not me.
Member
Join Date: Jul 2010
Posts: 29
First off,I want to say that these quotes really hit home with me.
How very true Wanting!
Also true 925. Those 2 quotes really hit home with what I'm about to say too.
So here goes..
*Hugs for Jenny and everyone*
I know exactly what you're going through Jenny. If you want to read some of my posts,go right ahead.
Basically I did EVERYTHING in the world for my ex boyfriend. He moved into an apartment next to a girl he admitted he had a "Crush"(and he had really never even met her! just from facebook at the time) on,and guess who was basically out the door within a month? I WAS. He stopped calling basically.
Might I add this same woman he has a "Crush" on is the ex of his best friend,and said friend is still in love with her. I've since met her as well,and she's become a friend. She says she has no interest in my ex.
This isn't his first time going through this. His exwife basically had enough of him after he had met anotehr woman,and claimed they were "destined" to be together. He basically told his exwife this,and she left him. And the other woman? She went back with an old boyfriend of hers. He's told me this himself.
He went as far as removing me from his facebook. He still comments on my friend his "crush's" Facebook as if she is some form of "goddess" I think some of him doing that is to get under my skin.
I sit and I wonder what she "has" or "knows" that I don't that would make him interested in her and not me. He went as far as to say my health actually "bothered" him. Nice excuse.
I also wonder if he would be as verbally and emotionally abusive to her as he was to me. Something else he also claimed he did to his exwife.
I think maybe I got too close to him.(He's bailed on me before) so now he has this "Dream" in his head about this other woman. He can't face the fact that there is a woman who really did(still does,I hate to admit) loves him.
Or maybe he just plain doesn't want me. I don't know. Either way,it's heartbreaking. I wish I could get off this rollercoaster of emotions.
Just keep posting here. I know it's helped me A TON. Know you're not alone,and I am sending positive energy your way.
She's his next victim. She's better than you because she doesn't know about his problems yet or doesn't say anything about them. He wants her because he can't be alone with himself and look at who he is and she hasn't made him look at who he is yet. He doesn't love you because he can't when he doesn't even love himself.
I would like to suggest he may be just looking for the next "feel good" and it's her. You should try to remember if he's an alcoholic he probably cannot deal with feelings so I
So here goes..
*Hugs for Jenny and everyone*
I know exactly what you're going through Jenny. If you want to read some of my posts,go right ahead.
Basically I did EVERYTHING in the world for my ex boyfriend. He moved into an apartment next to a girl he admitted he had a "Crush"(and he had really never even met her! just from facebook at the time) on,and guess who was basically out the door within a month? I WAS. He stopped calling basically.
Might I add this same woman he has a "Crush" on is the ex of his best friend,and said friend is still in love with her. I've since met her as well,and she's become a friend. She says she has no interest in my ex.
This isn't his first time going through this. His exwife basically had enough of him after he had met anotehr woman,and claimed they were "destined" to be together. He basically told his exwife this,and she left him. And the other woman? She went back with an old boyfriend of hers. He's told me this himself.
He went as far as removing me from his facebook. He still comments on my friend his "crush's" Facebook as if she is some form of "goddess" I think some of him doing that is to get under my skin.
I sit and I wonder what she "has" or "knows" that I don't that would make him interested in her and not me. He went as far as to say my health actually "bothered" him. Nice excuse.
I also wonder if he would be as verbally and emotionally abusive to her as he was to me. Something else he also claimed he did to his exwife.
I think maybe I got too close to him.(He's bailed on me before) so now he has this "Dream" in his head about this other woman. He can't face the fact that there is a woman who really did(still does,I hate to admit) loves him.
Or maybe he just plain doesn't want me. I don't know. Either way,it's heartbreaking. I wish I could get off this rollercoaster of emotions.
Just keep posting here. I know it's helped me A TON. Know you're not alone,and I am sending positive energy your way.
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Join Date: Oct 2009
Location: minneapolis, mn
Posts: 2,762
Beautiful post, Beth.
Jenny, I completely get this kind of torture. I know you will break free of this warped need you now have, but I also know that will never happen until the day that you realize you have had absolutely zero communication (includes drive bys!) with the x.
It felt like it took me so long. Well, hell, it did take me so long. I sometimes can't even believe that he is really not in my life anymore. It's like he and I are just away from each other for awhile or something. But the point is, that - like everything in our lives - we can't quite get there just because of what a dozen, or a hundred, others tell us. We just have to learn it for ourselves. With help from supportive others who have been there.
Finally, my pride got me there. I just could not ring that phone and have no one answer it, or send a message and have no reply, one more time. It was humiliating. All for the potential payoff of an occasional reply. Yeah, sometimes the reply was just what I wanted. But those times when it wasn't....finally did me in.
The good news (and I know you've heard this 50,000 times) is that is starts to feel really good, you feel empowered, you feel free, when you have really done it. It's been one month and one day since I last saw xabf and truly, there were times when I never thought that would happen, we were so enmeshed.
Keep posting honey. You'll get where you need to go.
Jenny, I completely get this kind of torture. I know you will break free of this warped need you now have, but I also know that will never happen until the day that you realize you have had absolutely zero communication (includes drive bys!) with the x.
It felt like it took me so long. Well, hell, it did take me so long. I sometimes can't even believe that he is really not in my life anymore. It's like he and I are just away from each other for awhile or something. But the point is, that - like everything in our lives - we can't quite get there just because of what a dozen, or a hundred, others tell us. We just have to learn it for ourselves. With help from supportive others who have been there.
Finally, my pride got me there. I just could not ring that phone and have no one answer it, or send a message and have no reply, one more time. It was humiliating. All for the potential payoff of an occasional reply. Yeah, sometimes the reply was just what I wanted. But those times when it wasn't....finally did me in.
The good news (and I know you've heard this 50,000 times) is that is starts to feel really good, you feel empowered, you feel free, when you have really done it. It's been one month and one day since I last saw xabf and truly, there were times when I never thought that would happen, we were so enmeshed.
Keep posting honey. You'll get where you need to go.
A Pirate looks at 40
Join Date: Jun 2010
Location: Southeast of Disorder (FL)
Posts: 264
Jenny you need a good but loving swift kick in the caboose (SP), Especially if he is now getting married after only one month!?!?!!?
If anything spells out emotional stability to me its getting married to someone after only one month. NOT!!!
The jerk is a user, among all his other issues. Now heal up, stand tall, and tell me more about your magical Noni juice.
If anything spells out emotional stability to me its getting married to someone after only one month. NOT!!!
The jerk is a user, among all his other issues. Now heal up, stand tall, and tell me more about your magical Noni juice.
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Join Date: Mar 2010
Location: Virginia
Posts: 685
Seems like I can't even avoid the drive bys. I was on my way to Best Buy last night... and we passed each other in the parking lot... guess where he was headed? THE BAR! I had to chuckle to myself. Not only is he a loser getting married after a month, but he still can't escape the bars.
One day, this will be over for me. Just patiently waiting.
One day, this will be over for me. Just patiently waiting.
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Join Date: May 2006
Location: UK
Posts: 1,149
marry in haste, repent at leisure etc, etc.
She's not "better" than you, she may well be a better "fit" to him romantically, that is neither a good, nor a bad thing, just the way it is, and ultimately none of your concern: that is their's to work out: good luck to them, I am willing to bet they are going to need all the luck they can get.
one of the things my therapist got me to play was a "lets pretend game" - so - let's pretend that they do get married and live happily ever after and he is magically cured of his need to drink and lying what do you think that would that mean?
... I needed to do this sort of thing with someone else (specifically a therapist) to point out the inconsistencies or plain crazy thinking.
One of the things I have yet to work on with any enthusiasm is why I find attractive people like this:
I know I need to do it, and I see that it will bring rewards, but I think it will be deep and messy and painful, Ugh, but it can't be messier and more painful than going through all of this again can it?
and as an aside - I have been on various anti-depressants throughout my life, we are not supposed to give out medical advice here, I'm sure you can appreciate why.
I am not sure if those posters who are stating that anti-depressants "numb" feelings are talking from experience, however that has not been my experience, I have taken them when prescribed by my doctor, and they have allowed me to become stable, to function emotionally, to a point where I can feel my emotions without being dangerously overwhelmed by them, so that I can process them without being paralysed.
I am not advocating taking medicines, just advocating doing what works for you, if that is hiking: fab. If you need something else, and your doctor agrees, that is okay too.
and as an aside, aside, there is evidence that St. John's wort can be effective for mild depression, but just because it is "all natural" and available OTC doesn't mean it is without side-effects - it photo-sensitises for example making people more prone to sun-burn, effecting vision, and cross-reacts with other medication - again, I'm not saying anything for or against it, just suggesting that these things are taken seriously and researched thoroughly...
She's not "better" than you, she may well be a better "fit" to him romantically, that is neither a good, nor a bad thing, just the way it is, and ultimately none of your concern: that is their's to work out: good luck to them, I am willing to bet they are going to need all the luck they can get.
one of the things my therapist got me to play was a "lets pretend game" - so - let's pretend that they do get married and live happily ever after and he is magically cured of his need to drink and lying what do you think that would that mean?
... I needed to do this sort of thing with someone else (specifically a therapist) to point out the inconsistencies or plain crazy thinking.
One of the things I have yet to work on with any enthusiasm is why I find attractive people like this:
You left him because he was an abusive, lying, alcoholic. Now you are pining for him. You may want to ask yourself what you find so attractive about abusive, lying, alcoholics.
and as an aside - I have been on various anti-depressants throughout my life, we are not supposed to give out medical advice here, I'm sure you can appreciate why.
I am not sure if those posters who are stating that anti-depressants "numb" feelings are talking from experience, however that has not been my experience, I have taken them when prescribed by my doctor, and they have allowed me to become stable, to function emotionally, to a point where I can feel my emotions without being dangerously overwhelmed by them, so that I can process them without being paralysed.
I am not advocating taking medicines, just advocating doing what works for you, if that is hiking: fab. If you need something else, and your doctor agrees, that is okay too.
and as an aside, aside, there is evidence that St. John's wort can be effective for mild depression, but just because it is "all natural" and available OTC doesn't mean it is without side-effects - it photo-sensitises for example making people more prone to sun-burn, effecting vision, and cross-reacts with other medication - again, I'm not saying anything for or against it, just suggesting that these things are taken seriously and researched thoroughly...
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Join Date: Mar 2010
Location: Virginia
Posts: 685
JenT, (that used to be my name, JenTy!), you say:
"one of the things my therapist got me to play was a "lets pretend game" - so - let's pretend that they do get married and live happily ever after and he is magically cured of his need to drink and lying what do you think that would that mean?"
Well, it would have to mean something was wrong with me. I know I'm being silly here, but that's how I would feel. Like, why is he able to change for her, and not me. I feel stupid even saying or thinking this way. I guess it would mean we weren't right for each other.. right?
Coffeedrinker, thank you for your words and support. It means a lot to me. I'm proud of you for being able to pull yourself away, as hard as it is. You always encourage and inspire me!
"one of the things my therapist got me to play was a "lets pretend game" - so - let's pretend that they do get married and live happily ever after and he is magically cured of his need to drink and lying what do you think that would that mean?"
Well, it would have to mean something was wrong with me. I know I'm being silly here, but that's how I would feel. Like, why is he able to change for her, and not me. I feel stupid even saying or thinking this way. I guess it would mean we weren't right for each other.. right?
Coffeedrinker, thank you for your words and support. It means a lot to me. I'm proud of you for being able to pull yourself away, as hard as it is. You always encourage and inspire me!
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Join Date: Oct 2009
Location: Missouri
Posts: 673
Jenny,
I suspect you're depressed and focusing all your energy on hurting. That's okay. IMO, it's normal and okay to mourn a relationship. You loved him, put lots of time and energy into the relationship, and suddenly it's gone. I don't know of many people who can simply put it out of their minds.
It'll take time to heal. Allow yourself that time. You can help yourself get better, too. Counseling, AlAnon, prescription meds (have you seen your doctor and told him/her what you're going through and how you're feeling). Also hanging out with friends, even when you don't want to. Friends get your mind off him for a while, and help you feel loved.
You ARE loved, lovable and valuable. Many women have low self esteem, and often hang their esteem on how they're treated by their sigother's. Work on your own self esteem. Be gentle on yourself. Take care of yourself. You're sooooo worth it!
HUGGS!
Tigg
I suspect you're depressed and focusing all your energy on hurting. That's okay. IMO, it's normal and okay to mourn a relationship. You loved him, put lots of time and energy into the relationship, and suddenly it's gone. I don't know of many people who can simply put it out of their minds.
It'll take time to heal. Allow yourself that time. You can help yourself get better, too. Counseling, AlAnon, prescription meds (have you seen your doctor and told him/her what you're going through and how you're feeling). Also hanging out with friends, even when you don't want to. Friends get your mind off him for a while, and help you feel loved.
You ARE loved, lovable and valuable. Many women have low self esteem, and often hang their esteem on how they're treated by their sigother's. Work on your own self esteem. Be gentle on yourself. Take care of yourself. You're sooooo worth it!
HUGGS!
Tigg
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2010
Location: Virginia
Posts: 685
My friend takes 5htp... he told me it helps him significantly!
Coffeedrinker, that makes me smile! Aww! I DID get the book. About to open it now!!!
Tigger, that was a very sweet post. Your empathy and compassion was exactly what I needed right now. I've really got to get back on track. I'm just falling apart. I'm excited about this damn book! I just don't know how to treat myself with respect or see my worth. I really am trying to point it out to myself, and it's so damn hard.
Thank you
Coffeedrinker, that makes me smile! Aww! I DID get the book. About to open it now!!!
Tigger, that was a very sweet post. Your empathy and compassion was exactly what I needed right now. I've really got to get back on track. I'm just falling apart. I'm excited about this damn book! I just don't know how to treat myself with respect or see my worth. I really am trying to point it out to myself, and it's so damn hard.
Thank you
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