Reached bottom and left today

Old 07-30-2010, 09:23 AM
  # 1 (permalink)  
A jug fills drop by drop
Thread Starter
 
TakingCharge999's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2008
Posts: 6,784
Angry Reached bottom and left today

We haven't slept together for weeks.

Yesterday I was exhausted and fell asleep watching TV at 7pm .

So we slept hugging. Today we were also hugging and then he started doing some strange movements like insinuating something.

And I had it.

A discussion ensued, and I had arranged to stay with my friend for a few days. So I told him that. He was worried about rent. I said well if I can indeed stay away for a month, then it is on you.

So he proceeded to act all nice and say "sorry, I will NEVER do it again! I will behave! be more educated" oh where have I heard that before.

I said I was tired, he could trust me and count on me and I indeed offer STABILITY (at least financial ...) but I didn't have any from him, he has often been disrespectful and I don't deserve it.

He said I was angry for something "little" . He said "he is a man". And what is he supposed to do about his horneyness?

An anvilheadesque response that came from me was "how is that MY problem?"

He said we should talk at 6. It will be brief because I am going to my group therapy at 730 and I will also be packing a few essentials.

I got my food coupons and pay today. And you know what I will be shopping and eating with my friend. Not an extra cent of mine out of my pocket to that guy.

I am sad but I am also fed up. He even said he has done a lot of efforts for me, and even offered to sign for a next year contract so I can stay in that apartment. I said fine don't sign anything, I'll solve that somehow.

He said he wanted to see me happy and that he would leave soon. I hope that is true.

Anyway my plan B is staying with my friend, I really do think she will welcome me for more time and I will just be going home to eat and care for my cats and plants, or to get ready for work.

PS the water heating machine is old and got broken. When mentioning it BF says "well I am used to shower with cold water anyway". Yeah and what about ME? .

PPS Thanks God for sending me signs like a raging Neurodermatitis, to realize my stress is REAL and not imagined. I needed that physical sign to WAKE UP.
TakingCharge999 is offline  
Old 07-30-2010, 09:44 AM
  # 2 (permalink)  
To thine own self be true.
 
Join Date: May 2009
Location: U.S.A.
Posts: 5,924
We haven't slept together for weeks.
You have been done with him for AT LEAST that long.
When are you going to permit your behaviors to catch up with your decision?
Learn2Live is offline  
Old 07-31-2010, 01:43 PM
  # 3 (permalink)  
Member
 
Join Date: Feb 2009
Posts: 2,059
hi tc-

don't know how i missed this thread yesterday!

bye bye boyfriend. hello peace and quiet!

i'm delighted for you! i love living alone. and hey, if you change your mind and you want to see him, he can take you out!

just imagine it...no more cheap orange juice as whole grocery contribution. no more him lying about. no more someone on your computer. no more carrying his load. no more laundry. no more pressure for sex. no more taking you for granted. no more....

naive
naive is offline  
Old 07-31-2010, 02:08 PM
  # 4 (permalink)  
Member
 
Join Date: Nov 2002
Location: Bristol TN/VA
Posts: 12,431
hugs, dear friend!

I am so glad you spoke up for yourself! And put your money and your feet into YOU.


this is what he can do with that man thing:



:rotfxko
Live is offline  
Old 07-31-2010, 08:38 PM
  # 5 (permalink)  
Member
 
Jadmack25's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2008
Location: Wizard Land Downunder
Posts: 2,615


I am glad you feel it is Time to put this relationship out of it's misery, and get YOUR life back. If he isn't so keen, well that's understandable, as he has had quite a laid back life with you mainly funding him, and now he has to face harsh reality again.

Have no doubt that you will go ahead in leaps and bounds TC.

God bless
Jadmack25 is offline  
Old 08-01-2010, 12:48 AM
  # 6 (permalink)  
Member
 
Impurrfect's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: Atlanta
Posts: 31,179
Good for YOU ((TC))! I truly hope this is the "beginning of the end" of him taking advantage of you. Heck, he's got a new job, he can foot the bills for once.

Enjoy the time with your friend!

Hugs and prayers!

Amy
Impurrfect is offline  
Old 08-01-2010, 06:49 AM
  # 7 (permalink)  
Member
 
coffeedrinker's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2009
Location: minneapolis, mn
Posts: 2,762
glad you found the strength, TC, to do what you have known for awhile.

(((hugs)))
coffeedrinker is offline  
Old 08-01-2010, 08:02 AM
  # 8 (permalink)  
Member
 
wicked's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: Waterford MI
Posts: 4,202
An anvilheadesque response that came from me was "how is that MY problem?"
thank you TC, I am glad to see you using your third eye!

i am trying to think of a way to use the above quote in my signature line!
"how is that MY problem?
LOL
exactly!
wicked is offline  
Old 08-02-2010, 11:32 AM
  # 9 (permalink)  
A jug fills drop by drop
Thread Starter
 
TakingCharge999's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2008
Posts: 6,784
He also said "now you are going to pay the double for rent"

Which made me double guess myself for the Nth time.

But then I thought before I met him, I was already paying the double.

And as you all say if I am relaxed and happy I will be able to study and give my job its place and grow and earn more $. A stressed TC goes nowhere. BTW thank God I CAN pay that $. He is working a lot and saving enough to leave. He already knows a friend who is also willing to share an apartment. I like that friend.

And yes, with therapy I aim to feel better overall with my life. And then we will see what he brings to the table. Soon he will earn more than me. We will see if he is as "generous" as he has always promised (LOL!) or if he was just a player. In any case I won't be around him 24x7 and that is progress.

Thanks for the support. It really made me stop double guessing. No more stress because the cats run around at night and don't let him sleep! What a blessing.
TakingCharge999 is offline  
Old 08-02-2010, 11:41 AM
  # 10 (permalink)  
A jug fills drop by drop
Thread Starter
 
TakingCharge999's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2008
Posts: 6,784
Yesterday he also cooked some kind of meat -gross- well the cats loved it so I didn't make a scene- but really I do not think I could have coped with that on the long term. That was a Sign from above for sure to this veggie going vegan.
TakingCharge999 is offline  
Old 08-02-2010, 07:33 PM
  # 11 (permalink)  
Member
 
tigger11's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2009
Location: Missouri
Posts: 673
YAY TC... Good for you! It's a tough decision to make, and usually, we wait FAR too long. Hang in there, you'll LOVE living a more peaceful life. Be sure to take care of YOU!

Huggs!
Tigg
tigger11 is offline  

Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
 
Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are Off




All times are GMT -7. The time now is 10:10 PM.