Chy

Often I just sit back and read your post's. As the alkie here I so admire all of your strength and compassion you give each other. You truly are an awesome bunch of ladies and are such a joy to watch intermingle with each other.

Thanks for keeping me coming back!

Daffodil

Hugs CHY,

Thank A.A., without A.A.'s 12 Step Program none of us would be here talking about recovering from the Family Disease of Alcoholism.

Chy

Hi Daffodil!

Thank you for that! I thank AA everyday along with my HP for letting this alcoholic see there is a beatuiful life beyond the bottle. I'd still be a miserable, self pitying, blameful mother and wife had I not found this site, which got me into the rooms of AA.

I finally have peace! *hugs*

countrygirl

Thank you for your post. It is encouraging.

Although perhaps I shouldn't, sometimes I wonder what AA thinks of Al-Anon. Do they blame us for our mistakes?

I guess I wonder if we as individuals are respected as human beings doing the best we can, trying to recover ourselves.

Every situtation must be different. I know I respect my alcoholic partner, who is a good person doing the best he can, at least the best he thinks he can do for now. I am so sad to see him hurting himself. Hope for better, for both of us.

Ann

Chy

Something I have shared with my other friends here that are in AA or NA....there comes a time when it doesn't matter anymore what brought us to recovery. What matters is that we walk together on this road and we each practice our program in our own individual way. If we look back, we both arrived here by different paths, but the road ahead is as beautiful for you as it is for me. I'm proud to be walking beside you.

Hugs and Prayers for Both of Us
Ann

Chy

Countrygirl,

I can't speak for everyother AAer but I have the utmost respect for people in Alanon. I sometimes wish my own family would have participated or done something for themselves so they could bare my constant rath, anger, and blameful way of living before I got sober.

I assure you I support every aspect of Alanon. I could ony hope and think every family with an alcoholic or addict in their family should find the peace and support that can be found in Alanon, so that they may realize, the behavior and addiction of the alcoholic or addict has nothing to do with them.

I hope by now you realize your A's actions have nothing to do with you as an individual, despite all the blame that I am sure is often imposed on to the non-A of the family or relationship. Us A's are very good at manipulation and can twist just about anyone into believing they are the ones at fault for our addictions. It just isn't so and don't ever let anyone tell you otherwise.

Alcoholics and addicts wallow in our own misery and are very hurtful to the ones that love us most. Despite all efforts of the A's family they can never find the solution for the alcoholic or addict. That must come from within themselves.

Yes, I did respect my hubby and family but also resented that since I couldn't muster up enough self respect for myself. See we blame for everything, in so doing, hurt everyone.

Thanks to AA I am a new person, I do love and respect myself now, and my family has always been and will always be by my side. I know they say one day at a time... for me there is NO turning back, no more false promises, no more bitterness. I'll be sober all the day's of my life so long as I work my program.

JT

Thanks Chy,

What a lovely thread!

Hugs,
JT