Bound to Happen
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Jul 2003
Location: Cincinnati Ohio
Posts: 94
Bound to Happen
It was bound to happen! What triggered it today? There I was in the counselor's office with my partner/friend sitting, listening, in a "feminine" mode. I listened and listened. I as doing well! I was feeling a bit smug and peaceful, too. But then the #*## hit the fan - I let it all fly - and it sure felt good - after "bottling" up my feelings for months and months. I admitted I had felt hurt and angry by my own behavior and by what had happened to me as a result of being in this relationship/business partnership/friendship - whatever! I'm staying with this to see it through - to see this through. I'm doing it for me. It's giving me the opportunity to grow and accept myself for being human. I'm truly weary of pretending to feel something I didn't feel. I'm glad I got really angry today and let it out. Now I can go forward. There were some tears and remorse, but now I know I can move on and do what's truly good for me. I am allowing myself to release the hold that I thought this guy had on me - realizing that he has no power over me - it's me who allowed it and pretending he did! We have created an incredible business opportunity for ourselves and our employees to "be the best they can be" but it sure is taking a lot of WORK! The challenge is to see if we will overcome our JUNK and finally LOVE ourselves. Whew! Onward!
:argue:
:argue:
Member
Join Date: Aug 2001
Location: That's what I'd like to know.
Posts: 2,416
I guess the flip side of "I am powerless over other people" is "other people are powerless over me". When that light dawns it's almost... well... embarassing, isn't it? So much of what "they" put us through, we really put ourselves through.
Hooray for your breakthrough!
Hugs,
Smoke
Hooray for your breakthrough!
Hugs,
Smoke
Queen of one liners
Join Date: Jan 2003
Location: walking beside you! Not in front of you.
Posts: 658
I can't tell you how long it took to get the back of my hand off my forhead....(I put it there before Super glue came out too...) What a relief to finally KNOW that I am empowered by my Higher Power to get to where He wants me to be....
I am glad though that no one told me it was EASY.....The program is simple and short and works in spite of me....BUT IT DOES TAKE WORK ON MY PART.
God Bless!
I am glad though that no one told me it was EASY.....The program is simple and short and works in spite of me....BUT IT DOES TAKE WORK ON MY PART.
God Bless!
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Jul 2003
Location: Cincinnati Ohio
Posts: 94
Thanks everyone for sharing and caring. I'm feeling so much better now. We were supposed to go out tonight to some event, but he is sick - sounds terrible! But, we are on a good path with each other - caring and understanding - loving. It's so much easier this way! I sleep better.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2003
Location: where I need to be
Posts: 157
still,
A similar situation occured at our counseling session yesterday. I was finally able to articulate everything that I was holding in.....as I spoke, I understood that my HP had taken over.....giving me the words of truth that I desparately needed to communicate. I felt very empowered afterward. AH was speechless. The counselor was speechless. I was able to communicate the issues effectively, how I was affected, and that I will no longer tolerate the manipulation, control and intimidation. This morning, he appeared to be a sad, scared puppy dog, and I'm no longer responsible for that, either.
Stay strong and true to yourself. Healing/recovery is a miraculous thing once you begin to focus on you and set your boundaries.
take care,
S
A similar situation occured at our counseling session yesterday. I was finally able to articulate everything that I was holding in.....as I spoke, I understood that my HP had taken over.....giving me the words of truth that I desparately needed to communicate. I felt very empowered afterward. AH was speechless. The counselor was speechless. I was able to communicate the issues effectively, how I was affected, and that I will no longer tolerate the manipulation, control and intimidation. This morning, he appeared to be a sad, scared puppy dog, and I'm no longer responsible for that, either.
Stay strong and true to yourself. Healing/recovery is a miraculous thing once you begin to focus on you and set your boundaries.
take care,
S
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Jul 2003
Location: Cincinnati Ohio
Posts: 94
Sarah,
Talk about HP
! I'll reread your post again and again to give myself the courage to continue to stand up for myself, too.
Wow! It really feels good to find our voice, doesn't it?
I'm enjoying "trying my wings" again. I used to know how to stand up for me, and am "still learning". Doing it with love and respect helps, too. Thanks so much for sharing.
Talk about HP
! I'll reread your post again and again to give myself the courage to continue to stand up for myself, too. Wow! It really feels good to find our voice, doesn't it?
I'm enjoying "trying my wings" again. I used to know how to stand up for me, and am "still learning". Doing it with love and respect helps, too. Thanks so much for sharing.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2003
Location: where I need to be
Posts: 157
(((((still learning)))))
Words cannot express how I felt, and still feel, about communicating my real thoughts, feelings, emotions and opinions. I think I had always tried to hold back for fear of hurting others. I'd tip toe around things.....phrase my words *just so* to avoid a conflict. And when I held it in, I was angry at myself, and, quite frankly, hated myself. It's a big issue for me....I hate who I was during our 20 year marriage. Holding back to, in my mind, keep the peace and make sure that everyone else around me was happy. I stuffed my pain.
Today, I have a new respect and love for me. It's been a long road of hard recovery work for me to get here......nine months ago I finally knocked AH off the pedestal...that I had put him on....and now, finally able to EFFECTIVELY communicate, without fear. And I know HP gave me the strength, and love to do so.
Take care of yourself.
Love, Learn and Laugh,
Sarah
Words cannot express how I felt, and still feel, about communicating my real thoughts, feelings, emotions and opinions. I think I had always tried to hold back for fear of hurting others. I'd tip toe around things.....phrase my words *just so* to avoid a conflict. And when I held it in, I was angry at myself, and, quite frankly, hated myself. It's a big issue for me....I hate who I was during our 20 year marriage. Holding back to, in my mind, keep the peace and make sure that everyone else around me was happy. I stuffed my pain.
Today, I have a new respect and love for me. It's been a long road of hard recovery work for me to get here......nine months ago I finally knocked AH off the pedestal...that I had put him on....and now, finally able to EFFECTIVELY communicate, without fear. And I know HP gave me the strength, and love to do so.
Take care of yourself.
Love, Learn and Laugh,
Sarah
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