steph1972

Its been a very trying couple of weeks in my life....I was mad for a few days...Cried for a few...But the last three days..I have felt very content...I don't know if this will be a lasting feeling or not...I sat on my porch earlier and found myself smiling....I feel like a different person...I spent so many years dealing with the ex husband and his drinking and partying...I have left him before, and taken him back too many times. This time, I know he will not be back. My home is peaceful and quiet and happy, and I will keep it this way.

All those years of al anon and a few therapists....I think it doesn't sink in until its the right time. Im not angry anymore. I have no desire to fight with him...Its profound...This feeling I have. Indifferent to him...Sorry for rambling on about this..Its a bit amazing to me to feel so good..to not feel stuck anymore...

I know I will get some grief for this, but I'm going to take a break from al anon and therapy. I don't want to fix anyone right now...I know I have issues, but right now...I just want to be...be me for a little while...If I start feeling crazy again..I know how to fix it...

Thank you all for the wonderful support here...It has helped so much....

Jadmack25

Sometimes all the therapy and other good stuff can tire us out. It seems to me you are in that place, and just need to stay there, content to be as you are.....wounded but ok for now. As you say, if you need to hurry back, you know where to come.

Hope your time out, is all you need it to be, and til you return and post.....

God bless

Hammerhead

Ecclesiastes 1:18 For in much wisdom there is sorrow and he who stores up knowledge stores up grief.

((hugs))