Can I feel free to ignore this last one?

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Old 06-14-2010, 01:06 PM
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Can I feel free to ignore this last one?

Another fun late Sunday afternoon undoubtedly drunken email from XAH, left in my inbox to start off my Monday morning *just right*.

I think I was clear the last time we corresponded. I ended my email with:
"This has nothing to do "extorting you to my will" and everything to do with the care and safety of DD. And it is also non-negotiable.

Let me know when you are willing to compromise."


Am I right in assuming no response to this stinking pile of XXXX is required?

"Your argument is that the unfamiliar environment may upset DD. 1; the people and furniture are all the same, you're essentially arguing that it might upset her if I spent the 3 hours with her at the park. 2; I'm her father, I'm just as appropriate as you for easing her emotional state.
More importantly you're arguing that the new apartment is more detrimental than losing her father.
I want you to answer just 1 question for me... Is it important to DD's happiness to have her father in her life? (this is a "yes" or "no" question, no sidestepping & I'll consider a lack of a response a "no") Sent from my BlackBerry® powered by Virgin Mobile."
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Old 06-14-2010, 01:24 PM
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Hit the delete button!!

He did not find contact with his daughter a strong enough motivator to show up for one court appearance. Why should his opinion on what is best for her count at this point? He is just putting his cr@ptastic baggage at your feet. In the bin with it!! It's rubbish.

You have custody. You are the deciding voice on what is right/safe for your daughter. He lost his voice by his own doing.

Hang in there baby, the quacking can be wild

Alice
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Old 06-14-2010, 01:27 PM
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"unfamiliar environment"? talk about DENIAL OF THE REAL PROBLEM.

Ah, the handy Ignore/Delete/Supr buttons.

Remember it is classic alkie behavior. Denial. Comes with the package. Nothing personal to ruin your day...
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Old 06-14-2010, 01:29 PM
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I'm her father, I'm just as appropriate as you for easing her emotional state.



Sorry.



"Easing" emotional states?




him?






LOL !!



what are you doing TODAY to make you feel better ?
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Old 06-14-2010, 01:33 PM
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LOL! Thank you all for your humourous responses. It's nice to know I'm not the only one shaking my head and thinking "What. The. F... is he talking about?!".

As for me...I'm going to try out a pre-advanced nuevo tango class tonight to see if I like the studio.
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Old 06-14-2010, 01:35 PM
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Since it's not happening to me, I find his wild, out of control, immature behavior quite comical. I hope you can see a little humor in it.

No need to respond. The correct answer is "no". He's right. He is not important to his daughter's happiness. She can be very happy without a delusional, ignorant, psychopathic father in her life. You can put money on that.

You laid out the terms which equal a boundary. Too bad you can't change your phone number.
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Old 06-14-2010, 01:38 PM
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Originally Posted by anvilhead View Post
i love terms like PRE-ADVANCED.....talk about a positive spin! LOL
Lol, as in "you don't quite suck anymore so take this class" :p
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Old 06-14-2010, 01:39 PM
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Originally Posted by nodaybut2day View Post
LOL! Thank you all for your humourous responses. It's nice to know I'm not the only one shaking my head and thinking "What. The. F... is he talking about?!".

As for me...I'm going to try out a pre-advanced nuevo tango class tonight to see if I like the studio.



Have a blast!
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Old 06-14-2010, 01:41 PM
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Being on the receiving end of numerous similar emails - I say don't respond. After way to long they have finally stopped, at least for now. I only ever respond to something logistical, never anything remotely like a 'discussion', which is really a laughable term but can't think of a better one.

I responded twice. One time I thoroughly regretted it because it just upset me and I think gave him steam to keep sending more. The second time was less about getting my point of view across and more about how it was - and the divorce was already final - so that one I regretted but his emails actually slowed down after that.
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Old 06-14-2010, 02:15 PM
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Good Lord, is there a "how to write emails like an ass" manual out there they all use?

That sounded so very familiar!
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Old 06-14-2010, 02:21 PM
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LOL pre advanced, isn't that called intermediate? its the first time I hear that term


Today I am going to my second Pilates lesson and I'm happy I can move muscles I don't know I have lol, next there is a kick boxing class and am looking forward to both.

Sorry for changing the topic but you have to admit tango, Pilates are much better topics !

I love the flashy Tango dresses, they are so pretty.
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Old 06-15-2010, 04:43 AM
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To reply to his comments would mean you would have deciphered them and also understood them. You don't speak Stupid, do you? No, thought not....so don't bother answering.

I am sure your DD needs anything but his teaching her about life....Great Heavens what a bewildered and cockamamy person she would turn out to be.
The only benefit he would be to anyone, is as a WARNING and example of what you can turn into if you fry your brain by abusing booze and/or drugs.

God knows, reading his past comments in your posts.....sure scared me from having an innocent little nightcap.

god bless
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Old 06-15-2010, 08:24 AM
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Originally Posted by nodaybut2day View Post
As for me...I'm going to try out a pre-advanced nuevo tango class tonight to see if I like the studio.
You go girl!

PS...why CAN'T you change your number?
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Old 06-15-2010, 08:43 AM
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Originally Posted by ItsmeAlice View Post
Hit the delete button!!

He did not find contact with his daughter a strong enough motivator to show up for one court appearance. Why should his opinion on what is best for her count at this point? He is just putting his cr@ptastic baggage at your feet. In the bin with it!! It's rubbish.

You have custody. You are the deciding voice on what is right/safe for your daughter. He lost his voice by his own doing.

Hang in there baby, the quacking can be wild

Alice
That's the nice way to put it. Here's my way.
Ignore that **** head. He's of no consequence anymore.
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Old 06-15-2010, 09:23 AM
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Originally Posted by rdy4change View Post
PS...why CAN'T you change your number?
It's not mine to change: I currently live with my parents and my father runs his business from home, so changing the number would mean a lot of mula. My work number remains unchanged for obvious reasons. My cell number can easily be changed, but I had until recently kept it solely for the purpose of pick up and drop off information. I guess I could easily change it now
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Old 06-15-2010, 09:24 AM
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Originally Posted by Jazzman View Post
That's the nice way to put it. Here's my way.
Ignore that **** head. He's of no consequence anymore.
Heheh I think he feels the shift in power...this morning, he left an ever-so-brave hang up message on my voicemail at work. Nice.
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Old 06-15-2010, 09:56 AM
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ever-so-brave hang up message


This is a fine example of the saying "Work the solution and the problem goes away."

Your solution to his quackity quack was to shut it down without comment, and all he could manage for rebuttal was ....click.....

Write this one down and remember what it feels like. It helps me to read my successes when I hesitate in making a decision and forget the simple lessons I've learn along the way.

Your recovery is showing

Alice
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Old 06-15-2010, 11:09 AM
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Exclamation Can I feel free to ignore this last one? YES!!!!!

When I filed for divorce in 1984 computers were just coming out & I don't recall phones having answering machines or voice mail yet. It is a good thing because I would just unplug the phone.

When my oldest D came home after a college summer class in Greece she was 21 so we went to the neighborhood bar for a beer & hamburgers. My soon to be ex....saw my car there & came in drunk as a skunk...yelling obscentatives at me until my daughter turned around & stared at him....it took him by surprise & also he decided to leave when he saw the bartender on the phone calling the cops.

The day he closed our joint checking account without telling me...I decided it was time to start the divorce proceedings. I went to my bank after work to deposit my paycheck so I could pay some of the bills & was told I had to go inside to talk to the bank manager. I do not know to this day how he managed to do this without my signature too.

I had money from my Aunt & Uncle to put down with the lawyer I chose so was ready to do it!!!!! My counselor said I was going through a love/hate period not knowing what would happen next.

You are doing so good. My lawyer wanted me to let the telephone company put a recorder on my phone line just to have the evidence of what his calls referred to. I didn't want to do that because then I would have to listen to his tirades.

He did a lot of things on his own to show what kind of person he was...he ignored all of the judges stipulations & the restrining orders & the first child support check sent to my lawyer bounced so he had enough wrongs to be sure he didn't have any visitation rights until he served his jail time and three years of sexual offender group counseling, which ended up four years of counseling because his counselor said that he still "doesn't think he did anything that wrong." :rotfxko

Taking care to keep you & your daughter safe is all that matters today. I did this & did not even think of what the future would bring. It took a while but I finally got myself back together in four years with the help of my older kids & their Dad. I quit drinking...had been drinking daily for four years after work & at home...what a mess I was along with needing medications for my severe clinical depression.

I am sending lots of good thoughts & hugs your way. I know how difficult it was for me & must be for you.


kelsh
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Old 06-15-2010, 11:23 AM
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Let me translate his email for you

"blah blahblah blah blah blah. And furthermore, blah blah, quack quack blah"
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Old 06-15-2010, 05:53 PM
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Originally Posted by Summerpeach View Post
Let me translate his email for you

"blah blahblah blah blah blah. And furthermore, blah blah, quack quack blah"
Toooooo funny. :rotfxko
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