FarawayFromCars

It is as they say--alcoholism is truly a family disease...why is it, though, that it is often the family members who are detached from the alcoholic are given the brunt of the "punishment" from those who continue to enable to alcoholic? My therapist suggested that since my parents feel that they cannot get mad at my AS, they direct their anger at me instead.

And now they're directing their anger towards me in incredibly childish ways--I'm "friends" with my mom on facebook, and I found out this morning that she "blocked" me because I have--gasp--dared to stand up for what I believe in! It's like she's trying to "punish" me for my decision to discontinue my relationship with AS. Insert a rolling of the eyes here.

I felt a flash of anger and wanted to write her an email expressing my hurt, anger, etc., but then it hit me: what good would that do? I can't reason any more with her than I can with my AS. My therapist told me, "if you choose to stay enmeshed in this, you will suffer." (I like that he often lays it out like it is, no mincing of words). So I'm making a conscious decision to let it go and move on. A break is needed. I accept that. I'm not going to contact her right now.

I'm going to concentrate on my new job starting tomorrow, and go on a killer ride this afternoon to work off some of this pent up energy.

Thanks for listening. I think...when I step back and realize how childish some of her actions can be, I can better make the decision to just stay out of it.

Hugs to all: FFC (Trying2Fly)

PieRat

Good and do not forget to laugh! It helps trust me.

Starburst

Yes, a break is good, you concentrate on you, good luck with the new job tomorrow, i'm sure you will be great.

Still Waters

Sigh.

I just shake my head at the lack of maturity displayed by some people. It just floors me.

Your therapist is right T2F, there is nothing at all you can do about it and you have little to gain by playing whatever game is necessary to keep in your Mom's good graces.

I'm sure sorry you're having to deal with this.

Trying2Fly

Meeeeeee too, Still Waters. It's baffling the things she'll stoop to. HER problem. Thank you all for helping me keep things in perspective; whenever I begin to doubt myself, I come here and I feel validated.
Today is good; just got back from an amazing ride and saw two cute bulldogs, which made me smile. Tomorrow will be good, too.

praiseHim

That sounds very hurtful, I'm sorry that you are treating you that way. When I read that, the first thing that popped to my mind was that they are in denial still and that it is probably threatening to them to see you setting boundaries and getting healthy. Not that it is an excuse for how they are treating you. I hope that things get better for you.

Ceres

It must be frustrating for her that she can't send you to your room! ;-)

It will blow over of course. When I hear other friends of mine talk about these "tiffs" they get into with their moms, ya know what I ALWAYS hear? = Love. Some of them just love each other crazy!