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-   -   D-I-V-O-R-C-E...what's that spell? (https://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/friends-family-alcoholics/202175-d-i-v-o-r-c-e-whats-spell.html)

nodaybut2day 06-01-2010 09:07 AM

D-I-V-O-R-C-E...what's that spell?
 
Hello my dear SR Family!

I just wanted to quickly update you on what happened with me in court yesterday.

First off, my lawyer was LATE because of traffic so when they called the court roster at 9h00, she wasn't there. I freaked out and left the courtroom to go find her. She arrived at 9h05 and ran into the courtroom. Then she came out and ran into the one across the hall to ask to proceed by default. She then ran out to tell me that I'd have to testify because she REALLY pressed the need for an URGENT divorce by reason of mental cruelty. She quickly prepared me for the kinds of questions I'd be answering and then once again disappeared into the courtroom.

Needless to say my heart was pounding by then. I waited from 9h20 to 10h45 just standing out in the hall, feeling like I was going to puke. I ran off to go pee, afraid the lawyer would call me in and I'd be gone, but damnit, I had to PEE.

She finally came out when I had found a place to sit and told me that it would be a while because for some reason, "they" lost a whole bunch of casefile, mine included. :( The judge refused to hear my testimony until they found my file. So together we waited for the break time to be over and then my lawyer went back in to tell them that she had copies of all the important documents on her so they didn't *really* need the file...I wasn't sure it would fly but I prayed really hard that the judge would hear my testimony that day and not ask us to come back another day! I think around 11h45 my lawyer came to get me.

I had to answer various questions to the judge about DD and XAH (and got reprimanded for not looking AT her while answering). I was really nerve-wracking and the judge was super serious. She even made my lawyer modify her judgment project because she said it didn't match the original judgment for custody. The judge and her assistant argued about where my file was and why it had been lost, etc etc. I finally got to sit down after my testimony and thought I'd fall over right then and there. And then she signed the judgment of divorce and we walked out of the courtroom.

I think I had to ask my lawyer three times if it was really over! I was stunned at how "easy" things had been. Had I known that things would proceed this smoothly, I would have left XAH a long time ago.

In 31 days, my divorce will be final and 30 days after that, I'll get my divorce certificate. Yay!! So, I guess you can call me divorced!

:a122:

On the worrisome side of things, I didn't hear from XAH (yay I can use that term now!) this week-end (he was supposed to contact me with his new address), and I got two calls from DSS' high school asking me where DSS was. He hasn't been in school for 2 days and they're worried. Now so am I... I've called the guidance counsellor again to discuss DSS, but had to settle for leaving a message on her voicemail.

So, all in all, God smiled on me yesterday. Thank you god and thank you SR family for your unending support.

rdy4change 06-01-2010 09:39 AM

Oh my! Noday...I have been watching the posts to hear from you. Reading it I thought i was going to throw up...i was nervous for you! But, all I can say is CONGRATULATIONS!!!

God did smile on you yesterday and will continue to do so each day going forward. You are a strong, brave woman and mom. May you be an inspiration to us all! Big hug to you!

Hammerhead 06-01-2010 09:52 AM

Congrats Noday!!!!


Needless to say my heart was pounding by then. I waited from 9h20 to 10h45 just standing out in the hall, feeling like I was going to puke.
That same "puke" feeling happened to me too.


Had I known that things would proceed this smoothly, I would have left XAH a long time ago.
Me too!

When we are looking up the mountain.... it always seems higher than it really is... but when we take it a day at a time... and then look back from the mountain top.... we ARE stunned. The process isn't always easy... certainly not without emotional ups and downs...and the occasional "puke feelings"... but what a glorious and divine feeling of accomplishment once we are there!

Now spread your wings and fly!

:ghug3

Thumper 06-01-2010 10:11 AM

Congrats! Look at all the ground you've covered in the last year! You have such a bright future. Yay!!!

MsPINKAcres 06-01-2010 10:46 AM

HUGS and PINK Thoughts of strength, courage and wisdom as you continue your path of living Happy, Joyous and FREE!!!

Rita

Bernadette 06-01-2010 10:56 AM

D-I-V-O-R-C-E...what's that spell?

For me it spelled FREEDOM and SANITY !!!

Sounds like a hair-raising day in court. Yikes. But you did it! Onwards and upwards!
peace-
b

ItsmeAlice 06-01-2010 10:58 AM

I read your post twice because I, too, thought I had missed something. 2 1/2 hours of nauseating tension and abracadabra you're divorced. I might have lost my breakfast and then some waiting the way you did.

So proud of you for sticking it out and enduring what you did to see this through. A clear difference from you XAH's reaction to trouble, which is to run. I agree that he's fled over the rent he owes and has taken DSS with him. If you hear from him pass the info on to others concerned about the boy, I guess. Beyond that, all you can do is let go and let GOD handle things.

Kiss little Miss Noday for us all!

BRAVO TO YOU!!!!

Alice

bookwyrm 06-01-2010 12:16 PM

Fantastic!!:banana::banana::banana:

theuncertainty 06-01-2010 03:31 PM

Congrats, Noday! Wishing you the best and hope you hear good news soon about DSS.

tjp613 06-01-2010 03:54 PM

Wooooo Hooooooooo!!!!!! You did it!!!
:ring:You_Rock_:danse1b:

tjp613 06-01-2010 03:56 PM

Boy, he sure turned out to be a lot of hot air, didn't he??? Sheesh.

Jadmack25 06-01-2010 07:39 PM

Hmmm! D-I-V-O-R-C-E spells............FREEDOM. You have earned it, now enjoy it.

God bless

http://i532.photobucket.com/albums/e...dBalloons2.jpg

isurvived 06-01-2010 07:57 PM

Well, congrats to you!!!!!!!!!!!! Another survivor!!!!!! What a relief that must have been, you are blessed to have it behind you.

May your coming hours, days, weeks, months and years be filled with tranquility and happiness!


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