Joy33

Unfortunately my first trip to Al-Anon didn't work out... Ironically, I got lost in the church where the meeting was being held and couldn't find the meeting for the life of me, and just left the building crying in sheer frustration. :P So much for HP intervention... I'll try again on Sunday.

Anyway, I've been feeling bitter and angry towards my ex in the past few days.** Sometimes I think too much, and my mind wanders and my imagination runs and I just stress myself out. Most likely my ex is sitting in his living room playing video games drinking $8 vodka straight from the bottle. I keep picturing him and some beautiful new woman throwing darts at my picture and then running off to make love. Then I get angry. Again, like I said... I think too much and my imagination takes over. Part of me doesn't want to blame him for the hurt and the pain that he inflicted on ME, because I say, "Oh that's not him, that's the alcohol abuse. I can only blame myself for the end of this relationship." Then I remind myself: NOT TRUE!!

My imagination does this--> So I do this-->

So when I start worrying about things that are totally out of my control, I like to visit this website: Help Others.org: Acts of Kindness. I CAN control my actions and how I treat people!! I love to read the heart-warming stories of people helping others. I get inspired by them. I've performed a few random acts since discovering the website, and I've ordered the Smile Cards. I think kindness and compassion are so important in life. I admit, one of my random acts of kindness was for my ex (though I did it anonymously). Everyone deserves kindness. I know I can't help him, but it made ME feel better that I secretly injected a little ray of sunshine into his week. Selfish? Nah. I did something good for someone else and it made me feel good too! Win-win!

**Watch for a future thread from me where I will try to pick everyone's brains on how alcoholism warps a person's thought processes and I'll delve a little more into my frustrations with him and my confusion in a few days.

Spiritual Seeker

Better luck finding Sunday's meeting.
Alanon works when we work it; may you find a group for you.

Pelican

I recommend calling the church that is holding the meeting. I did when I moved away from my home group. I called the church and asked for a contact number of someone from the group. I called the group contact and asked where to park and how to find the meeting.

If you would like to pick my brain on how alcoholism warped my thought processes, please feel free to post your questions. A few other members are also recovering alcoholics and we are willing to share ES&H (experience, strength & hope) with non-alcoholics. I try to share from my personal experience as an alcoholic and my personal experience of living with an active alcoholic spouse.

WizeDeb

Funny you mentioned this ... On FB one of my farmville friends (dont know her) posted she didnt recieve a child support check from her XAH and her son. Now mind you the neighbors have been mowing my lawn. The first time it happen no one would tell me who it was. They wont take money from me either. I was so blessed. So I messaged her and said I would like to help you, and explained the lawn mowing someone did for me. She didnt want to accept it but eventually I talked her into it. Someone did something for me so I wanted to make sure I did something for someone else. It over joyed me when she posted the pictures of her son on the field trip.

Joy33

Thanks Pelican, I'd love to pick your brain, or anyone else's brain who'd like to offer me some insight.

Thanks all!

CAPTAINZING2000

That's a good site


If, you can't find any numbers for Al Anon where you live, try looking for AA numbers. You can probably get help finding a meeting that way.