this sounds SO typical -- pretend that nothing MAJOR went on between you all, and it's just business as usual.

What are the chances of introducing Mr Crazy to insane Dad, and leaving them to it?

MY dad raged at me my entire life, told me I would never amount to anything and was worthless. I woke up this morning remembering an incident when my middle son was a toddler. We were at my dads, down by the trout pond when a Heron landed about ten feet away. We were looking at it, amazed and awed by its size. Until my father shot it from the porch. Shot it dead right next to us. How's that for crazy? Then, when I freaked out on him for shooting it that close to my baby, he laughed at me for not trusting him.

The mnemonic DREAMS can help elicit pertinent details after the trauma history has been obtained . With each event, the examiner should determine if the patient appears emotionally Detached (called alexithymia), either from the event or in relationships with others. It may also manifest as a general numbing of emotional responsiveness. The patient Reexperiences the event in the form of nightmares, recollections or flashbacks. The Event involved substantial emotional distress, with threatened death or loss of physical integrity, and feelings of helplessness or disabling fear. The patient Avoids places, activities or people that remind the patient of the event. The symptoms have been present longer than one Month, and the patient experiences Sympathetic hyperactivity or hypervigilance, which may include insomnia, irritability and difficulty concentrating.

I will go back to posting on other threads where I might be of some help.

You understand XXX others are trying to squeeze you and I out. We better work together a little better to preserve both our places in the market. We were the first and are still the smartest, but we need to work together on some level to stay on top.

Dude, I know what they are doing and I'm not about being on top. I want to grow slow and strong, and let them do what they are doing. They don't threaten me even though they are doing more than me. In fact, I wouldn't mind working with them in the future possibly if there was anything that fit Transforms and my business model. The bottom line though, is I'm content, right where I am.
I can't work with you anymore. You know this. Transform doesn't want any association at all, but I'm trying to be cordial because we are all in this industry together and our projects are going to cross paths. There's no need for us to make things difficult for each other.
That being said, I need you to understand that there are boundaries between you and I. I thought you understood that, but after receiving this e-mail I feel I need to reiterate them. We won't collaborate on any projects again. If you are doing an event and it's legit, we'll cover it. If you are doing an event and it's legit, we'll get our papers to your event and represent ourselves there. If you want to take papers to another state or something specific, ask and most likely it'll be ok, as long as you aren't misrepresenting yourself in association with the paper. I worry that you might, and if that's a possibility, then I'd prefer you didn't take them.

My concern is that you and I don't get too friendly again. We will never be friends like we were. That is what got us in trouble and I'd rather have full cut off of communication than to go through that again. So, while I appreciate the sending of possible leads and the offer to take the paper to out of state conferences, I need you to know that I may or may not accept the help, depending on the circumstances, and that I'm looking at every transaction (with anyone, not just you) with no emotion, just straight business. It's about the betterment of our industry, and on a smaller scale, our own individual businesses.

I was advised not to even send this e-mail--that it would start a whole new ball of wax rolling with you. I sent it because I felt I needed to try for peace one last time before cutting off communication the way Transform did. This is my first and only attempt to find some sort of boundaries that will allow us to interact with each other in passing, within this industry.

By the way, how did you get this e-mail from XXX?

I hope I've made myself clear, and you have taken what I say positively, instead of negatively. If you are taking this negatively, I ask that you don't reply.

Sincerely,
H