Got a call from my son

Old 04-07-2010, 11:15 AM
  # 1 (permalink)  
Psalm 118:24
Thread Starter
 
CAPTAINZING2000's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2004
Location: ILLINOIS
Posts: 15,203
Question Got a call from my son

He asked me to take him to another town to see his attorney after work. Should I go in while, he's talking with his lawyer? I know the lawyer he's in AA. I didn't know if it would help or just stay out of it altogether???
CAPTAINZING2000 is offline  
Old 04-07-2010, 11:21 AM
  # 2 (permalink)  
Psalm 118:24
Thread Starter
 
CAPTAINZING2000's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2004
Location: ILLINOIS
Posts: 15,203
He's 21 hes paying for his attorney fee himself. I was going to ask my son if, he wanted me to go in.
CAPTAINZING2000 is offline  
Old 04-07-2010, 11:31 AM
  # 3 (permalink)  
Psalm 118:24
Thread Starter
 
CAPTAINZING2000's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2004
Location: ILLINOIS
Posts: 15,203
i made a point a while back to tell his lawyer after an AA meeting to have AA included in with his sentence. I know I shouldn't have but, I pray, if he goes to enough meetings something will sink in that thick skull of his.
CAPTAINZING2000 is offline  
Old 04-07-2010, 11:48 AM
  # 4 (permalink)  
Member
 
Join Date: Aug 2009
Location: Portland, OR
Posts: 534
The lawyer should disallow it to preserve the attorney-client privilege. Otherwise, if he admits anything in front of you, it would be admissible in court. The attorney also has an obligation to his client only. If your son doesn't want to go to AA, the attorney has to fight against that.

And aside from that, I'd stay out of it. You know that being forced to go to AA won't do anything to help him get sober if he doesn't want it for himself.
wanting is offline  
Old 04-07-2010, 01:01 PM
  # 5 (permalink)  
Member
 
Freedom1990's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2008
Location: Kansas
Posts: 10,182
Originally Posted by CAPTAINZING2000 View Post
i made a point a while back to tell his lawyer after an AA meeting to have AA included in with his sentence. I know I shouldn't have but, I pray, if he goes to enough meetings something will sink in that thick skull of his.
I can tell you from my own experience that any nudges or 'help' that I tried to manipulate the situation with when it came to my AD always backfired on me.

I hope you really dig into Alanon, and get the focus back on yourself.
Freedom1990 is offline  
Old 04-07-2010, 02:16 PM
  # 6 (permalink)  
Living in a Pinkful Place
 
MsPINKAcres's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2006
Location: Louisiana
Posts: 7,545
praying for you and your son -

comfort for you as you watch your son walk his own path, strength to let him go and Let his Higher Power work in his life and the courage to take care of you as this happens

for your son to have an open heart and mind - to hear what HE needs to hear, when he needs to hear it

try to remember whether you are in the room with your son & the atty or not - God's in control and you will find out what you need to know when you need to know it!!

HUGS,
Rita
MsPINKAcres is offline  
Old 04-07-2010, 04:05 PM
  # 7 (permalink)  
To thine own self be true.
 
Join Date: May 2009
Location: U.S.A.
Posts: 5,924
I vote for "just stay out of it altogether."
Learn2Live is offline  
Old 04-07-2010, 04:53 PM
  # 8 (permalink)  
Psalm 118:24
Thread Starter
 
CAPTAINZING2000's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2004
Location: ILLINOIS
Posts: 15,203
I was sitting out in the hall with my son when, my son's lawyer showed up. He had us go back into his office. His lawyer and I go back 10 years we got sober at the same time.


The lawyer didn't pull any punches at the trouble he was in.

I'll be going to Al Anon Thursday night while, my son is in the other room for AA.

I've kept my cool and haven't been yelling at him over this. Big concern now is to stop him from getting a felony over this.

Lot of things going around in my brain right now
CAPTAINZING2000 is offline  
Old 04-07-2010, 05:06 PM
  # 9 (permalink)  
Member
 
LaTeeDa's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: behind the viewfinder...
Posts: 6,278
Originally Posted by CAPTAINZING2000 View Post
Big concern now is to stop him from getting a felony over this.
That's the lawyer's job, not the dad's.

L
LaTeeDa is offline  
Old 04-07-2010, 05:09 PM
  # 10 (permalink)  
Psalm 118:24
Thread Starter
 
CAPTAINZING2000's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2004
Location: ILLINOIS
Posts: 15,203
grrr
CAPTAINZING2000 is offline  
Old 04-07-2010, 05:28 PM
  # 11 (permalink)  
Member
 
Freedom1990's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2008
Location: Kansas
Posts: 10,182
Originally Posted by CAPTAINZING2000 View Post
Big concern now is to stop him from getting a felony over this.
"And acceptance is the answer to all my problems today. When I am disturbed, it is because I find some person, place, thing, or situation--some fact of my life--unacceptable to me, and I can find no serenity until I accept that person, place, thing, or situation as being exactly the way it is supposed to be at this moment. Nothing, absolutely nothing, happens in God's world by mistake. Until I could accept my alcoholism, I could not stay sober; until I accept life completely on life's terms, I cannot be happy. I need to concentrate not so much on what needs to be changed in the world as on what needs to be changed in my and in my attitudes."

Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous, 1st edition
Freedom1990 is offline  
Old 04-07-2010, 06:04 PM
  # 12 (permalink)  
Member
 
MissFixit's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2008
Posts: 2,582
hugs
MissFixit is offline  
Old 04-07-2010, 06:10 PM
  # 13 (permalink)  
RIP Sweet Suki
 
suki44883's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2008
Location: In my sanctuary, my home
Posts: 39,725
Originally Posted by LaTeeDa View Post
That's the lawyer's job, not the dad's.

L
I have to agree 100% with this. Step back, dad.
suki44883 is offline  
Old 04-07-2010, 07:38 PM
  # 14 (permalink)  
Member
 
coffeedrinker's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2009
Location: minneapolis, mn
Posts: 2,762
I think I will never forget a young man that I met - oh, about 12 years ago, at an AA meeting. This guy was about 19 years old. He spoke. He said "The worst thing my parents ever did, was to get in the way of my consequences."
I'll never forget it.
coffeedrinker is offline  

Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
 
Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are Off




All times are GMT -7. The time now is 04:03 AM.