Did he ever remember your birthday?
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2009
Posts: 100
Did he ever remember your birthday?
It's my birthday today and I'm here thinking about birthday's past and just reflecting a little.
The last birthday he didn't even give me a card.
All the four birthdays prior to that he didn't give me anything on the day because he was too "broke' Strangely enough, he always had beer in the fridge but was too broke to even buy me a card.
Did you ever get anything on your birthdays? Even a card?
The last birthday he didn't even give me a card.
All the four birthdays prior to that he didn't give me anything on the day because he was too "broke' Strangely enough, he always had beer in the fridge but was too broke to even buy me a card.
Did you ever get anything on your birthdays? Even a card?
Member
Join Date: Jan 2010
Location: Upper Midwest
Posts: 220
I just wanted to wish you a happy birthday! Usually, for me, birthdays and holidays are awful - he pulls out all his worst behavior to make them exceptionally bad and memorable. So - does he remember? Yes... do I wish he didn't? Yes!
Member
Join Date: Feb 2010
Location: Reality, NJ
Posts: 853
Happy Birthday to you!!!
Yes..I always got glamorous gifts from him...because he needed to look good you see. It made him feel good about himself. They were never really personal or anything.
My birthday falls on Christmas day..so since I am European and we celebrate Christmas eve more it made more sense to spend Christmas eve with my side and Christmas day which was also my birthday with his side. Not even once did his side have a cake for me. This killed my mother. Although they didnt celebrate adults birthdays in his family you would think since by default they spent if with me they would at least have somrthng small to celebrate me. Nope. Never. I got a happy birthday from them and then next topic of conversation. This year, my family got me a HUGE cake on my birthday to also celebrate me.
Yes..I always got glamorous gifts from him...because he needed to look good you see. It made him feel good about himself. They were never really personal or anything.
My birthday falls on Christmas day..so since I am European and we celebrate Christmas eve more it made more sense to spend Christmas eve with my side and Christmas day which was also my birthday with his side. Not even once did his side have a cake for me. This killed my mother. Although they didnt celebrate adults birthdays in his family you would think since by default they spent if with me they would at least have somrthng small to celebrate me. Nope. Never. I got a happy birthday from them and then next topic of conversation. This year, my family got me a HUGE cake on my birthday to also celebrate me.
Member
Join Date: May 2009
Posts: 290
HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!! 
Hope you enjoyed your day anyways and made the best of it.
My last birthday sucked - AH didn't get out of bed until 1pm, because he'd been drinking all night, even though I had asked him not to. He handed me a gift card to a clothes store (didn't even bother writing anything on there)mumbled happy birthday and went back to bed. I was soo mad - not just because it was my bday, but because it was also our 1st year wedding anniversary - no cards, because he said he didn't have money for a card (though he had money to buy booze the night before). We didn't celebrate at all and barely even talked. I went out by myself for a bit in the afternoon and that night we ended up getting into a fight! SR helped me through the day!
Sending you a big cyber birthday hug!!!
Hope you enjoyed your day anyways and made the best of it.
My last birthday sucked - AH didn't get out of bed until 1pm, because he'd been drinking all night, even though I had asked him not to. He handed me a gift card to a clothes store (didn't even bother writing anything on there)mumbled happy birthday and went back to bed. I was soo mad - not just because it was my bday, but because it was also our 1st year wedding anniversary - no cards, because he said he didn't have money for a card (though he had money to buy booze the night before). We didn't celebrate at all and barely even talked. I went out by myself for a bit in the afternoon and that night we ended up getting into a fight! SR helped me through the day!
Sending you a big cyber birthday hug!!!
It's funny that my husband doesn't like cards. He doesn't like to give them but likes to get them. Enjoy your day...because it is "your" day.
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Join Date: Sep 2008
Location: Wizard Land Downunder
Posts: 2,615
He would have had to be cast in concrete not to have got the less than subtle hints from me. Like your AH, he also made sure of the priorities in his life were taken care of first, eg carton, betting money and anything or anyone who could be of use to him.
Got told by him once..."I'm not really much into cards and that stuff", so I told him that,
"I wasn't into drinking, drunk and that stuff either, maybe you should find someone who doesn't care and me look for someone who does". I also buy myself whatever I want as my special gift to me.
Can you go out and celebrate for yourself, and know you won't be alone, as a few others here would be there with you.
God bless
Got told by him once..."I'm not really much into cards and that stuff", so I told him that,
"I wasn't into drinking, drunk and that stuff either, maybe you should find someone who doesn't care and me look for someone who does". I also buy myself whatever I want as my special gift to me.
Can you go out and celebrate for yourself, and know you won't be alone, as a few others here would be there with you.
God bless
Member
Join Date: Feb 2010
Location: Reality, NJ
Posts: 853
Originally Posted by Jadmack25 
Got told by him once..."I'm not really much into cards and that stuff", so I told him that,
"I wasn't into drinking, drunk and that stuff either, maybe you should find someone who doesn't care and me look for someone who does". I also buy myself whatever I want as my special gift to me.
"I wasn't into drinking, drunk and that stuff either, maybe you should find someone who doesn't care and me look for someone who does". I also buy myself whatever I want as my special gift to me.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2010
Posts: 97
NormaEinstein! Happy Birthday!
I'm sorry about your special day. I've had a number of birthdays hijacked by alcoholism, and it's been hard for me not to feel terrible about it. Because you know what? It's just not nice. It's not nice that someone close to you would make zero effort there. Anyone with a pencil, paper, and 5 minutes can make a cute card, right?
Happy birthday, anyway, dang it!
And the rest of you posters, happy LATE birthdays to you.
1234
I'm sorry about your special day. I've had a number of birthdays hijacked by alcoholism, and it's been hard for me not to feel terrible about it. Because you know what? It's just not nice. It's not nice that someone close to you would make zero effort there. Anyone with a pencil, paper, and 5 minutes can make a cute card, right?
Happy birthday, anyway, dang it!
And the rest of you posters, happy LATE birthdays to you.
1234
Member
Join Date: Feb 2010
Posts: 218
He remembered it and enjoyed the birthday dinner I had made but no card, no gift, nothing. He wasn't a fan of birthdays or Christmas (I LOVE Christmas and the spirit of the whole season - am glad not to have a sourpuss around bleating about commercialism anymore).
So for my birthday ... I splurged on myself and bought myself -exactly- what I wanted -- had a gorgeous birthday lunch with friends and didn't let him get me down in the evening. I had begun detaching by then and it ended not long after.
So for my birthday ... I splurged on myself and bought myself -exactly- what I wanted -- had a gorgeous birthday lunch with friends and didn't let him get me down in the evening. I had begun detaching by then and it ended not long after.
5Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2009
Posts: 100
Thank you so much for your birthday wishes!
Even without AH, it has not been the best birthday.
My sister's cat died earlier this morning and she's devastated as am I.
The iron also just blew up on me and burnt my hand.
What a day.
Hopefully next years better!!!
Even without AH, it has not been the best birthday.
My sister's cat died earlier this morning and she's devastated as am I.
The iron also just blew up on me and burnt my hand.
What a day.
Hopefully next years better!!!
Member
Join Date: Aug 2009
Posts: 3,443
He forgot most of them and the one's he did remember were at the last hour (like the night of) and with something like a pop and candy bar. Oh yeah, woo me.
One year he remembered a week later and said something and my oldest cried because he felt bad they forgot. After that I reminded everyone. I didn't usually get anything and if I did it was not something personal or thoughtful, or expensive. I don't care one wit about expensive gifts but if you can't put any thought into it, or get something meaningful, then spend some money and get something most people would like, lol.
One year he remembered a week later and said something and my oldest cried because he felt bad they forgot. After that I reminded everyone. I didn't usually get anything and if I did it was not something personal or thoughtful, or expensive. I don't care one wit about expensive gifts but if you can't put any thought into it, or get something meaningful, then spend some money and get something most people would like, lol.
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