Sting

I think I know the answer, but what if I come across some really interesting reading material that I think would be helpful to my wife. I would not do it in a preachy way, but just in a "this is interesting and relevant" way. I think there is so much good information out there to let her know that she is not alone. I know better than to give her "my" opinion because then I am "controlling" (been down that road) but what about 3rd party advice or information. Is that just asking for trouble?

Jadmack25

The only time I give my RABF advice, is when he is getting on my wick or doing his "fat Controller" act, then he gets told to leave it be or watch out.



And yes, I have pointed out a few articles or tv programs he may find interesting, and just left them up to him to read or watch as he wished.

God bless

sapphire69

Those are the things that I randomly leave lying in the bathroom. When I throw out the magazines and that is all he has to read I know he gets the point and I never say anything about it.

coffeedrinker

yeah, if you think it would be accepted as helpful.

i think, tho, that you're trying to give her a message that only she can get in her own time, and in her own way.

if it falls on deaf ears, what's the point, really?

barb dwyer

I know one who,
it doesn't matter WHAT it is -
if I say anything -
ANYTHING
about it -
he will go the OPPOSITE way.

Or go OUT of his way NOT "to"
NOT to try it.
NOT to read it.
NOT to listen to it.
NOT to think about it.

And make kind of a 'deal' about
showing me how far he's going ... NOT to.

You know -
I don't know how many days I have left on this world....
but I know for a fact I don't want to spend what could be my last day....

... wondering if someone like that does...
what I think they ought to.

LOL

TheQuixotian

If there is something you think would be useful to share and could be of help, I don't see why not.

My experience was that, surprisingly enough, some of the things that I did say in the past he actually heard and listened and brought up and discussed months and even more than a year later.

So sometimes they do hear and listen but don't rely on it having immediate or any effect. Maybe it can be a tool for her to learn from in her own time and no one can say when that will be; but it doesn't hurt to try as long you don't beat yourself up if nothing changes.