Eight Ball

I had another 'lightbulb' moment today.

My AH of 22 years had a bit of a shock recently with his Alcoholic dad dying at a fairly young age of 65. AH has been sober for 8 days and is the loving sober person that I like/love. Along with this though, I have now started to get thoughts in my head that I am not good enough for him and he could do better than me and I have realised that this is down to my own low self esteem. I couldnt see it before as it wasn't obvious to me, but I do now. Its must be something that is deeply ingrained into me, I just have to figure out how to surface it, deal with it and move on.

Am I making sense? I didnt get the low self esteem bit until now.

CashFan

You make perfect sense. I was the same as you, very low self esteem. I joined the local fire brigade, and spent a year training, and wow that has improved my confidence enormously. I grew up being put down by an unloving family, then hubby one was abusive alcholic. It is something to consider for you seeing as you are in Oz too, Im sure you have a local cfs, cfa, or mfs, that you could join. I swear, when I first walked in there, nervous as anything, no confidence, but they really are lovely people, and the courses they pay for you too. Or maybe a club you could join, make new friends, all that helps us grow. Even posting in here is a great step, as everyone is helpful, nice, and dont judge you. We are your mates, and understand what you are going thru, as we are or have been in your shoes.

Gold

Makes perfect sence to me too.
I have read recognition of an issue is the first and often hardest step.

Thinking we are not good enough is one reason we say and put upith an unhealthy relationship.

You are good enough. What is important is being good enough for ourselves. making choices we are proud of. Being true to our goals and dreams.