WizeDeb

Im wondering if there is anyone who's AH committed suicide? Maybe I could chat with them, help each other out with the mixed emotions

Insulated

are you 100% certain the death is suicide? sometimes A's say things that lead in that direction, but don't really have the intention of going through with it. Sometimes their death is accidental and coincidental to the timing of statements leading up to the death.

WizeDeb

January 9 is the day he did it.

Pelican

(((Deb)))

Weekends are sometimes slow. I hope you will be able to connect with another member soon.

How are you today?

Insulated

wize, this is a very fresh wound. have you tried hospice? my alcoholic/addict overdosed on 11-29-09. I woke up next to him dead. Hospice has been my savior and really helped with the stages of grief and the bouncing around through those 5 stages. The best advice I can give you is to take your time and DO NOT under any stretch of imagination entertain ANY bad stories or statements from anyone. Please please please prepare your cookie cutter response now. Trust me on this.

WizeDeb

thanks isulated People do say the most crazyies things. Im so sorry for you loss too

PHIZ007

WizeDeb....I have been thinking of you. How are you coping?.....no direct experience of spouse but my best friend committed suicide three years ago - jumped off a cliff leaving her husband and two small boys.....I felt like my heart had been ripped out!.....It is the most unimaginable painful experience ever and my heart goes out to you.

People have said terrible things to me such as "She is better off" "Something positive will come of this"......."The kids are probably better off without her depression"....the list goes on and on and on.....as above take NO notice. There is nothing good about suicide - her soul was so lost it was all she could see poor darling. She suffered majorly from depression......

The best things for me was to take each day as it comes and I had to feel the pain....I went to grief councelling which was wonderful - somewhere to dump exactly how I was feeling without being judged or told she was better off! grieve as I needed too....I spent around 18 months crying daily for her....but slowly surely the sun came out again for me and now I do have the most beautiful precious memories that I will hold onto forever. I miss her each and every day and sometimes even now (almost three years on) I may get a day where I cry all day long for her.....but the happy times are now prominent in my memory instead of her dreadful death.

Take care WizeDeb I hope that has helped somewhat, and hugs to you and your daughter.......Phiz

PHIZ007

I also have a candle for her....that I light now and again but always on her birthday, her anniversary and always at Christmas. It is one of those that flickers through rainbow colours.....its beautiful and peaceful to watch and it really helps me. In the early days I used to light it...just because...and just for her. Just wanted to share that extra bit with you incase that may also help you are someone else on SR....take care Phiz

Kassie2

What kind of help or disucssion/support would you like? Haven't had a family member do this but been close to others who did. Willing to give support.