Wondering...do the addicts/alcoholics read here in F&F?
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Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2009
Location: Land of Cotton
Posts: 3,433
Wondering...do the addicts/alcoholics read here in F&F?
.... just wondering if the addicts & alcoholics on SR visit our F&F forum. I know it can't be 'easy' to do so. If you do, can you post a "Hi! Yeah, I read here" or whatever you like! Thanks! 
same planet...different world
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Butte, America
Posts: 10,946
I'm an alcoholic recovering from a habit of marrying alcoholics.
Well, alcoholic criminals... were my magnetic gift.
So in a manner of speaking I see things here,
from both sides of the fence.
Well, alcoholic criminals... were my magnetic gift.
So in a manner of speaking I see things here,
from both sides of the fence.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: Ohio
Posts: 24
I am an alcoholic in recovery, and do read this forum quite often. I also see things from both sides of the fence, as I have numerous family members and friends who are practicing alcoholics, so it is helpful for me. My father, in particular, is in very poor health as a result of the disease. Most threads here seem to be about boyfriends/husbands, but that is okay. They are still insightful. Just my two cents...
Member
Join Date: Nov 2008
Posts: 2,582
Hey,
Tigger, I wondered that too. There was a thread months ago about that, I think. Someone brought up that an A would have to be in recovery (probably) to admit that he/she needed/wanted to read this forum or even check out this site. Also, I think that the person would want to do research or self help type things to come here. My exA definitely doesn't fit either category, but I there are probably some who do.
Just my thought.
Tigger, I wondered that too. There was a thread months ago about that, I think. Someone brought up that an A would have to be in recovery (probably) to admit that he/she needed/wanted to read this forum or even check out this site. Also, I think that the person would want to do research or self help type things to come here. My exA definitely doesn't fit either category, but I there are probably some who do.
Just my thought.
Member
Join Date: Oct 2009
Location: Missouri
Posts: 673
MissFixIt, my curiosity on this point comes from knowing how our A's try to control us. Finding SR-FF and determining who their co-dependents are would be like finding a control-goldmine for some of our A's.
I had pictures of me and my criters on here early on, but removed them for just that reason. He might guess who I was from my handle. But I'm not about to change it now. If he wants to read my posts and the pain he caused, and is causing me, go for it. Early on, it might have been awful, but now that we're separated, whatev.
I had pictures of me and my criters on here early on, but removed them for just that reason. He might guess who I was from my handle. But I'm not about to change it now. If he wants to read my posts and the pain he caused, and is causing me, go for it. Early on, it might have been awful, but now that we're separated, whatev.
Last edited by tigger11; 01-09-2010 at 07:56 PM. Reason: editorial
To Thine Own Self Be True
Join Date: Jun 2008
Location: So Cal
Posts: 1,946
Hi there.
Yep, I read here. I have been in recovery and sober for 20 months now and it helps to remind me, along with my step work, etc., that it is not all about me!
I don't post in this forum often unless someone is asking for an alcoholic's take on something. I don't want to intrude and I appreciate you being open to us popping in here now and again. I also come from a family of alcoholics and lost an ex bf to this disease, so I am a family and friend as well
Yep, I read here. I have been in recovery and sober for 20 months now and it helps to remind me, along with my step work, etc., that it is not all about me!
I don't post in this forum often unless someone is asking for an alcoholic's take on something. I don't want to intrude and I appreciate you being open to us popping in here now and again. I also come from a family of alcoholics and lost an ex bf to this disease, so I am a family and friend as well
Nonexistent Willpower
Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: Texas
Posts: 439
I am an alcoholic. My father was an alcoholic. My XGF of 10 years is an alcoholic.
I love reading the F&F forum. I went to CoDependency meetings my first two years of sobriety along with AA. It was ran by Al-Anons, mostly women. Those ladies taught me a lot about how to love and take care of myself.
I see we got some real Black Belt Al-Anons here! I really enjoy their posts. Also being the good Alcoholic, ACOA, and...well I don't know if I would qualify as an Al-Anon or not. But at any rate being the Alcoholic I am, I like throwing my 2c in here and there once in awhile. I know what it's like to live (or not really live) with one of me.
I love reading the F&F forum. I went to CoDependency meetings my first two years of sobriety along with AA. It was ran by Al-Anons, mostly women. Those ladies taught me a lot about how to love and take care of myself.
I see we got some real Black Belt Al-Anons here! I really enjoy their posts. Also being the good Alcoholic, ACOA, and...well I don't know if I would qualify as an Al-Anon or not. But at any rate being the Alcoholic I am, I like throwing my 2c in here and there once in awhile. I know what it's like to live (or not really live) with one of me.
same planet...different world
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Butte, America
Posts: 10,946
*double dipping*
I started coming here more often when I'd come to the place in my own recovery
that it was finally time to be more complete ...
and apply the steps in ALL aspects of my life.
Just another sick person trying to be well.
I started coming here more often when I'd come to the place in my own recovery
that it was finally time to be more complete ...
and apply the steps in ALL aspects of my life.
Just another sick person trying to be well.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2008
Posts: 133
I am a recovering alcoholic addicted to a practicing alcoholic!! Four years clean, and it is a double-edged sword reading and posting here. I caused this much pain when I was using, and now I am on the receiving end of that pain. Kind of ironic, isn't it? We can only see clearly (and feel clearly) when the booze is gone.
Member
Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: Atlanta
Posts: 31,179
I consider myself a "double winner" like ((Laurie)). I think I was BORN a codie, had 3 XABF's, developed my own addiction, and am in recovery from both. If it wasn't for the great people I've met on the F&F forums, I would NOT be coming up on 3 years clean and leading the life I do!
Hugs and prayers!
Amy
Hugs and prayers!
Amy
Member
Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: uk
Posts: 124
I am a 'double winner' too. My own recovery began four years ago; but I stayed with my XABF for over two years which nearly drove me insane. It helps me stay clean and sober, knowing the harm it causes others when I drink. It also helps me put the relationship in perspective, and realise that it wasn't my fault even though I was, typically, blamed for EVERYTHING! This forum really helps me.
Member
Join Date: Nov 2008
Posts: 2,582
Hey,
I think it is helpful for me to have former A's here.
My earlier post was just about "our" specific active A's that brought us here. I seriously doubt mine reads here as he is still active and not very computer savvy. Forums, group therapy and self help isn't his bag. He and his A friends would also scoff at this site.
As far as "our" A's reading on here to control "us" like Tigger mentioned, I remember hearing one instance last winter where someone had to change her username because of that. To me this site is just for those using it. I would not have told my A about it as it is not for him, it is for MY growth.
I think it is helpful for me to have former A's here.
My earlier post was just about "our" specific active A's that brought us here. I seriously doubt mine reads here as he is still active and not very computer savvy. Forums, group therapy and self help isn't his bag. He and his A friends would also scoff at this site.
As far as "our" A's reading on here to control "us" like Tigger mentioned, I remember hearing one instance last winter where someone had to change her username because of that. To me this site is just for those using it. I would not have told my A about it as it is not for him, it is for MY growth.
Heathen
Join Date: Mar 2009
Location: La La Land, USA
Posts: 2,567
All the time.. yep. Although an ex addict/drunk here, I've been in plenty of relationships and friendships with folks of the same thread to identify with some of the struggles that are experienced here as well. I think we have a lot to learn from each other.. that's kinda part of this being a community, the diversity of the issues we all face, and the common thread that they live on.
Now in regards to "your A's", which now looking back and reading, I think was the original question.. There have been some folks in F&F that have recommended SR to "their A" hoping that they would jump into a recovery community and magically get the support they need to stay sober. Other times there have been incidences where someone leaves their computer on the website and people have read what they've been writing (this most recently happened on the 'other side', a man who posts regularly in the alcoholism section left his computer on with SR all logged in, and his girlfriend (now ex) read everything he had been writing, and actually began posting under his name. Freaky stuff.
SR is an EASY website to find for anyone looking for alcoholism and addiction support. Super easy.. Like if I'm wondering about an addiciton issue and google it, one of the very top results are the posts on SR about the issue I googled. Serious! I'm very thankful it was easy to find, of course.. however that certainly opens it up for anyone else to find too.
If you're uncomfy with the thought of "your A's" reading these posts, just make sure and use a screen name that isn't identifyable as well as keep personal information hidden, like you would on any public and well known website.
Now in regards to "your A's", which now looking back and reading, I think was the original question.. There have been some folks in F&F that have recommended SR to "their A" hoping that they would jump into a recovery community and magically get the support they need to stay sober. Other times there have been incidences where someone leaves their computer on the website and people have read what they've been writing (this most recently happened on the 'other side', a man who posts regularly in the alcoholism section left his computer on with SR all logged in, and his girlfriend (now ex) read everything he had been writing, and actually began posting under his name. Freaky stuff.
SR is an EASY website to find for anyone looking for alcoholism and addiction support. Super easy.. Like if I'm wondering about an addiciton issue and google it, one of the very top results are the posts on SR about the issue I googled. Serious! I'm very thankful it was easy to find, of course.. however that certainly opens it up for anyone else to find too.
If you're uncomfy with the thought of "your A's" reading these posts, just make sure and use a screen name that isn't identifyable as well as keep personal information hidden, like you would on any public and well known website.
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