AS Gets Out on Friday
 

My AS gets out of rehab on Friday after 28 day stay. Although I see the progress she is making after visiting with her twice already, as well as a family counseling session, why am I uneasy about her getting out??? Her counselor suggested she go to a 90 day “half way house” to continue with her recovery, but we can’t afford to send her anywhere like that, due to lack of funds.

Although she has come out on multiple occasions this past month stating that she is an alcoholic (a first) and has to work on staying sober, there is a voice in the back of my head saying that she is saying what we want to hear, that this is a bunch of lip service. I pray I’m wrong, but her comments on this past visitation were about wanting to get home and “sleep for two days” and lounge around watching TV.

Perhaps my trust with her has been totally destroyed over the past 10 years, but I also know what she has done in the past after her brief periods of sobriety, back to her secret drinking. I’m just going to take it a day at a time and pray that she is able to stay sober, that is the best I can do.

Thanks for listening, I feel better for getting that off my mind.

Thanks for sharing dreamstones...

When I am expecting something from someone I worry and suffer a lot... when I expected an XABF to be discrete and he wasn't... when I expect to see him in some event and he doesn't arrive....when I expect him to be the same drunkard and I overhear him talking about some studies...

I try to have no expectations at all and think about me and my activities... plan for today or plan something in the long run that motivates me.. or read the news or a book or paint or whatever to get distracted. I hope you have your support group handy, that you keep posting and you got ways to cope with whatever happens (therapist/sponsor)

No one knows what will happen tomorrow, we only got today.. not even today... just now... you can't control her or cure it. She is on God's/HP's hands, and so are you...

Sending good vibes your way!

Thanks for the vibes, you are right, I know that, I believe that, I just need to remember that. Believe me, I chant the 3 C's constantly, take it a day at a time, Al-Anon, etc. Perhaps I've had enough and I'm putting up my walls of detachment already, though it is hard to do because of my Mom, who depends on me. I told my sister during our family session how this is the same thing we went through with our Dad. She didn't even realize it and doesn't think she is as "bad" as Dad was, though he died at 46 as a result of his health being compromised from the years of heavy drinking. Stuff like that is what makes me wonder why we bother, she isn't really taking is seriously, is providing lip service to appease us all till she gets out. Yeah, I need to quit worrying about what could be and focus on the now.

Thanks TakingCharge!