grandson will be leaving
 

Well friday nite the 17YO grandson snuck out of the house and went drinking again. We didn't know he had left till his mother woke him up in the morning and he was still drunk. It's so sad, He's so wasting his life and none of us can get thru to him- He gets caught and STILL will stand right there and lie to us and tell us yes he snuck out but he didn't drink- As I said before he drinks he leaves our house. His Mother just found out this week that she is going to be able to get her own place thanks to the generousity of a AA friend. So the grandson will be leaving with her, I pray for her sobriety and for him. He's got a long hard road ahead of him. Love him but can't seem to help him. Could use all your prays and any advice on helping him would be appreciated.

hi miss muffet-

you seem a wise granny and able to set boundaries and keep them. hopefully, he will hit his bottom and seek help.

and yes, it's quite amazing how freely the lies flow. i'm still astounded by it, to be honest.

glad that your house will be drunk free soon.

as much as I don't want him to go thru pain, I wish too something bad would happen to scare the crap out of him-- get caught drinking etc. -- something before he gets himself into really bad trouble. The sooner he can hit bottom the suuner he can start getting better. He did go to a AA meeting tonite with his mother. Don't know if he is reaching out for help or just manipulating his mother-- time will tell.

hey miss muffet: it's going to take what it's going to take. Yes, it will be helpful for him to start experiencing tough consequences from the get-go. Those are always helpful in the long run. But having been where you're at (my AS is now 24), i know that those consequences are just a blip on their radar screen because young males in this country are young punks - even the ones who do not engage in partying-type behavior are young punks who think they have total control over everything in their lives. From my observations, it's not until the mid to late 20s that our loved ones start wearing down and become willing to make a major change in their life - and that's even with a family who does not enable.

So keep doing what you are doing and dig in for the long haul. Keep coming back here for ESH and to offer us yours!