Ship Jumpers Swimming To Shore

Old 12-25-2009, 02:26 PM
  # 61 (permalink)  
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I already took the Christmas tree down. I couldn't wait to take it down. I got it because I wanted him to have a nice, festive Christmas since he's had so many bad ones. He never saw the tree because he started drinking again and I wouldn't let him come over. I'm dragging the tree carcass out to the dumpster and heading over to be with my family. Pumpkin pie and happy holiday smiles are waiting for me.

It's now day 10 of no contact and I think I can stop counting the days now. I think I've touched toes to the ocean floor and I'm walking out of the water.

Merry Christmas everyone. May your Christmas be filled with laughter, strength, and confidence that you're on your way to a healthier and far happier life.

Hugs for everyone!!!
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Old 12-28-2009, 01:50 AM
  # 62 (permalink)  
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Yep, I got a little too full of myself. Feeling a little too over it. He kept sending me texts. I thought he "sounded" sober in them. I called him tonight. I thought I'd just tell him to work on himself and to stop sending me texts. I was just worried and wanted to hear that he'd been sober all this time. The conversation quickly turned ugly. He was very sweet at first. We talked for about an hour. He said he hadn't had a drink in a "week or so". We talked, I said I couldn't be there for him right now because I needed to take care of me. I told him that I'd been very worried about him. It was when I told him that his family cared about him too that he lost it. He started cussing and screaming that they didn't care about him. Then I realized that he'd been drinking.

This whole time I've really been thinking that he's going to snap out of it.

He said a lot of things about his current situation - he's alone, broke, spent Christmas alone, has no one, is miserable, etc. He was very angry at the end of the conversation. I ended up just hanging up while he was yelling. I feel stupid for thinking he was going to be sober. I feel stupid for calling.

I think I made it two weeks with no contact. I guess I needed a reminder why I was doing that? I just thought that maybe he'd been working on being sober. He's just drinking. Still drinking.

Back in the water trying to escape a leviathan now...
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Old 12-28-2009, 02:55 AM
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Hey Pedaling,

Don't feel stupid. Just learn from this and move on. Yep that ol addictive mentality - oh woe is me. You contacting him is not going to get him sober and is just going to make you miserable. This man needs help (which takes time) - he needs to be "turned inside out" to see what he has done and until he gets it a healthy relationship cannot be. Don't romatize. Accept reality - he is an active alcoholic. Getting sober is up to that individual and if they want it they can have it no matter how far they have fell. YOu don't need to help him. It does get easier. Besides you don't know what is in your future..if it is meant to be it will be. But no matter what happens you will be alright.

Listen I have been there. It does get easier. I would rather be alone then be with him and still be alone along with all the drama.

Hugs
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