Off Topic - and just a bit rambling.
Curled up in a good book...
Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: UK
Posts: 1,542
Off Topic - and just a bit rambling.
I feel sick. I'm back from the vets. My oldest cat and biggest snuggle fiend has just been diagnosed with Feline Diabetes. The vet thinks it might have been brought on by his monthly steroid injecttion. So we're skipping the injection and seeing if his blood sugar drops over the week. I think we caught it very early - he's been drinking a lot lately but that's all the symptoms he's shown.
I'm scared by this. Looking at websites on Feline Diabetes has shown me that looking after him with diabetes will be a lot of work. He will be relying on me to give him injections on time, to monitor his blood sugar and watch his behaviour for any signs of trouble. I'm feeling so overwhelmed by this. It could literally be life and death for him if I make a mistake. But I have to do it. I have to believe I can do it - and do it on my own. I love him. I just hope I can keep myself together for him. I've been having a hard time emotionally over the past few days. This has just depressed me even more. And I realise that I'm borrowing trouble - it may just go once the steroids work out of his sytem.
Please, cross your fingers that this will work out and that he will be OK, whatever the results of his blood test next Monday will be.
Just to tie the thread in to the forum - I've been thinking about telling STBXAH about this. I've been no contact for so long - I don't really want to break it. But if I were in his place, I'd want to know about this. I'm feeling suspicious about my motives though since I have been feeling very low lately. Maybe I should wait till next week before deciding what to do. Thoughts anyone?
I'm scared by this. Looking at websites on Feline Diabetes has shown me that looking after him with diabetes will be a lot of work. He will be relying on me to give him injections on time, to monitor his blood sugar and watch his behaviour for any signs of trouble. I'm feeling so overwhelmed by this. It could literally be life and death for him if I make a mistake. But I have to do it. I have to believe I can do it - and do it on my own. I love him. I just hope I can keep myself together for him. I've been having a hard time emotionally over the past few days. This has just depressed me even more. And I realise that I'm borrowing trouble - it may just go once the steroids work out of his sytem.
Please, cross your fingers that this will work out and that he will be OK, whatever the results of his blood test next Monday will be.
Just to tie the thread in to the forum - I've been thinking about telling STBXAH about this. I've been no contact for so long - I don't really want to break it. But if I were in his place, I'd want to know about this. I'm feeling suspicious about my motives though since I have been feeling very low lately. Maybe I should wait till next week before deciding what to do. Thoughts anyone?
Belgian Sheepdog Adictee
Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: In Today
Posts: 6,101
First take some deep slow breaths. Take a breath, hold to the count of 10, exhale. Repeat at least 9 more times.
That will slow you down, bring down the racing of your brain and help you to think a bit clearer.
Please know that 'steroids' do raise the blood sugar. I am a diabetic and I do get a sterioid injection in both my knees once a month. My blood sugar does go up for about 36 hours and then comes back in line.
So it may not be diabetes and by stopping the injections his bs will come back in line. Then you will have to find another treatment for whatever he was getting the sterioids for, which may not be as rigorous as for treating feline diabetes.
I think WAITING until you have more 'concrete' information and diagnosis, before calling STBXAH is a really good idea!
Sending out prayers for the fur baby that this works out and sending out prayers for you also.
Love and hugs,
That will slow you down, bring down the racing of your brain and help you to think a bit clearer.
Please know that 'steroids' do raise the blood sugar. I am a diabetic and I do get a sterioid injection in both my knees once a month. My blood sugar does go up for about 36 hours and then comes back in line.
So it may not be diabetes and by stopping the injections his bs will come back in line. Then you will have to find another treatment for whatever he was getting the sterioids for, which may not be as rigorous as for treating feline diabetes.
I think WAITING until you have more 'concrete' information and diagnosis, before calling STBXAH is a really good idea!
Sending out prayers for the fur baby that this works out and sending out prayers for you also.
Love and hugs,
Member
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: Boston
Posts: 2,936
from Laurie: I think WAITING until you have more 'concrete' information and diagnosis, before calling STBXAH is a really good idea!
Ditto. Ditto. Ditto.
Can you share more about why you're feeling low lately? Approaching holidays? is this your first holiday season in your new home? When I get blue I often start to throw lots of good practices right out the window because I just feel overwhelmed, etc. I try to remember to HALT.
Don't let myself get too:
Hungry
Angry
Lonely
Tired
Hope kitty improves...easy does it...one day at a time!
peace & (((((hugs)))))
b
Ditto. Ditto. Ditto.
Can you share more about why you're feeling low lately? Approaching holidays? is this your first holiday season in your new home? When I get blue I often start to throw lots of good practices right out the window because I just feel overwhelmed, etc. I try to remember to HALT.
Don't let myself get too:
Hungry
Angry
Lonely
Tired
Hope kitty improves...easy does it...one day at a time!
peace & (((((hugs)))))
b
Seeking Serenity
Join Date: Dec 2009
Posts: 144
Bookwyrm, stay the course! The two above posts are excellent ideas. Don't let yourself slide backwards. You need support and you have it...here...with all of us! We will pray for you to stay strong and for your baby to get well fast. I have two of my own and they are my life since leaving my stbxah.
The holidays are tough...especially for us new people on this journey. My counselor said this is going to be a year of "FIRST". First Thanksgiving without him, first Christmas, first New Year, first Anniversary (would have been our 32nd) and on and on. She also said it will pass and there will be no more "FIRSTS" to deal with. I liked it because there was a beginning, middle, and an end in sight for me.
It's not an easy road, but so worth the peace you find when you are out of the insanity. We all support you and wish you and your baby well! Keep us posted!
The holidays are tough...especially for us new people on this journey. My counselor said this is going to be a year of "FIRST". First Thanksgiving without him, first Christmas, first New Year, first Anniversary (would have been our 32nd) and on and on. She also said it will pass and there will be no more "FIRSTS" to deal with. I liked it because there was a beginning, middle, and an end in sight for me.
It's not an easy road, but so worth the peace you find when you are out of the insanity. We all support you and wish you and your baby well! Keep us posted!
Curled up in a good book...
Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: UK
Posts: 1,542
Thank you all. You're right. I need to stop and breathe. What will be will be and all the fretting in the world won't help! I can hope its just the steroids, give him pets on demand (as usual) and keep an eye on him - its all I can do!
I've been unwell lately which doesn't help and yes, I'm very tired cos I'm not sleeping well. It is the first Christmas in my new place. It just seems to be approaching so fast - I haven't really thought about it consciously. Time to dig out my journal and start writing again. It works really well for me and I don't know why I keep letting it slide. No, I think I do know. I feel self conscious about it - embarrassed almost! Taking time to write down my own thoughts and feelings!!? Who do I think I am!? LOL!
I've been unwell lately which doesn't help and yes, I'm very tired cos I'm not sleeping well. It is the first Christmas in my new place. It just seems to be approaching so fast - I haven't really thought about it consciously. Time to dig out my journal and start writing again. It works really well for me and I don't know why I keep letting it slide. No, I think I do know. I feel self conscious about it - embarrassed almost! Taking time to write down my own thoughts and feelings!!? Who do I think I am!? LOL!
A jug fills drop by drop
Join Date: Nov 2008
Posts: 6,784
hi book, i am sorry for your dear cat.. i hope he gets better soon.
also i have heard of alternative therapies for pets too.. sounds strange but i saw my best friend's dog dying of cancer and homeopathy saved her... she is 18 years old.. and playful and running around as if she was the youngest dog ever... so perhaps there are similar options.
if it turns out he needs treatment and someone to commit perhaps you could hire someone from a vet hospital to go check on the pet... or ask a friend, family or neighbor to do it for you.. also, when my cat Dolce was also suspected to have a bad disease the vet told me sometimes treatments are painful and people prefer to put the pets to sleep. it sounds harsh but if I knew my cat was suffering a lot that would be the most compassionate thing to do.
Hugs and I hope you two feel better soon! put it in God's hands.
also i have heard of alternative therapies for pets too.. sounds strange but i saw my best friend's dog dying of cancer and homeopathy saved her... she is 18 years old.. and playful and running around as if she was the youngest dog ever... so perhaps there are similar options.
if it turns out he needs treatment and someone to commit perhaps you could hire someone from a vet hospital to go check on the pet... or ask a friend, family or neighbor to do it for you.. also, when my cat Dolce was also suspected to have a bad disease the vet told me sometimes treatments are painful and people prefer to put the pets to sleep. it sounds harsh but if I knew my cat was suffering a lot that would be the most compassionate thing to do.
Hugs and I hope you two feel better soon! put it in God's hands.
same planet...different world
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Butte, America
Posts: 10,946
hey, I used to baby sit my friend's cat-
gave him his injections -
he didn't even resent me for having to poke him!
even if he DOES wind up having it - it's a way treatable, handle-able thing.
I've even known of cats diagnosed clear of diabetes after a year of treatment.
and - my opinion -
unless the 'x' is going to be footing ALL the bills - leave 'em out of this.
this is the new life stuff. contacting the x would be the equivalent of taking a drink at this p0int. It would solve nothing.
gave him his injections -
he didn't even resent me for having to poke him!
even if he DOES wind up having it - it's a way treatable, handle-able thing.
I've even known of cats diagnosed clear of diabetes after a year of treatment.
and - my opinion -
unless the 'x' is going to be footing ALL the bills - leave 'em out of this.
this is the new life stuff. contacting the x would be the equivalent of taking a drink at this p0int. It would solve nothing.
Seeking Serenity
Join Date: Dec 2009
Posts: 144
I feel the same way about my journal...it IS sort of embarassing. Lots of people tell me it's good for you. It takes the poison out of your body by writing down all the things you have bottled up inside.
This is my first Christmas in a new apartment...while my ah is in my beautiful home on the golf course! Talk about feeling sad...memories of Christmas pasts when the children were young and when life was easier to understand! But a very wise person told me to 'make my own new memories in my new house'. You know what...that's exactly what I'm doing.
I put up some of the things from my old house and it actually looks pretty nice. I bought a little tiny tree...seriously tiny! I swear it's about 4 feet tall, but you know what...it's mine and I decorated it in less than 10 minutes. It was all I felt up to doing. There was something soothing to me to put up the tree that I resisted putting up for so long.
Step one...make a list of what needs to be done and prioritize the list. Don't think too hard about the list...you will make yourself crazy...just make the list. There is something theraputic about crossing off the actual accomplishment as you do those things on the list. It shows progress.
Step two...get some rest. Everything seems harder to deal with when you are tired. Take Benedryl if you have to, but get some sleep.
Step three...stop being so hard on yourself. You are human and your feelings are yours and they are real. It's a horrible time to be dealing with this...but in time...it will be easier.
This is my first Christmas in a new apartment...while my ah is in my beautiful home on the golf course! Talk about feeling sad...memories of Christmas pasts when the children were young and when life was easier to understand! But a very wise person told me to 'make my own new memories in my new house'. You know what...that's exactly what I'm doing.
I put up some of the things from my old house and it actually looks pretty nice. I bought a little tiny tree...seriously tiny! I swear it's about 4 feet tall, but you know what...it's mine and I decorated it in less than 10 minutes. It was all I felt up to doing. There was something soothing to me to put up the tree that I resisted putting up for so long.
Step one...make a list of what needs to be done and prioritize the list. Don't think too hard about the list...you will make yourself crazy...just make the list. There is something theraputic about crossing off the actual accomplishment as you do those things on the list. It shows progress.
Step two...get some rest. Everything seems harder to deal with when you are tired. Take Benedryl if you have to, but get some sleep.
Step three...stop being so hard on yourself. You are human and your feelings are yours and they are real. It's a horrible time to be dealing with this...but in time...it will be easier.
Recovering Codependant
Join Date: Oct 2007
Location: Liverpool, Great Britain
Posts: 1,335
Hi Tracey, one question for you in relation to telling ex about your kitty... has he shown you any sign that he still cares about your cat, called to ask directly about her, bought her cat food, paid a vet bill? Just some ideas of the top of my head!
When my dog was attacked by another bigger one, I immediately went and called exabf. I thought he would want to know. He acted all concerned obviously, but over the next few days, never once called to ask how she was (she suffered a nasty head wound). It dawned on me that he had cut her out of his affections, probably from the moment we split.
I hope your cat gets better, if you need to do all that caring for her, you will find it in you to. You obviously love and care for her deeply, it will be second nature to do for her what she needs.
Lily xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
When my dog was attacked by another bigger one, I immediately went and called exabf. I thought he would want to know. He acted all concerned obviously, but over the next few days, never once called to ask how she was (she suffered a nasty head wound). It dawned on me that he had cut her out of his affections, probably from the moment we split.
I hope your cat gets better, if you need to do all that caring for her, you will find it in you to. You obviously love and care for her deeply, it will be second nature to do for her what she needs.
Lily xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Member
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: Boston
Posts: 2,936
Hey Bookwyrm...sorry to hear you are not feeling well either. The first couple years after my divorce whenever I got sick I got really weepy, I would just feel so blue! It's not like the exH was ever helpful when I was sick....it was just emotionally overwhelming - how much energy it took to rally myself everyday - and then to be sick - UGH - I'd just fall apart.
Since that time I take illness more seriously-- I try to just stop everything when I am sick and lie down with tea, books, wooly socks etc! And I try (try) to ask for help. Normally I would never call a friend and ask for TLC but - hey everything had to change so I changed! Instead of saying "No, No I'm really OK" and hanging up the phone and bursting into tears - I say "I'm a mess , can you please bring me some soup?"
It has been one of the hardest things for me to change - to ask for and accept help. But it has made a huge difference in my stress level and it has changed me as a human being. I realize now that everyone wants the opportunity to genuinely help someone, we all love to be able to help the person who actually wants our help! That healthy non-codie helping!!! So I am actually doing good by finally letting my friends help me.
I can't access the "more smilies" - I was going to post that big bus and say hey we're all coming over to decorate for Christmas and make hot chocolate!!
How about some marching stars then.....
Do take care, rest and recharge! I hope you feel better soon and that goes for kitty too! ((((hugs))))
peace-
b
Since that time I take illness more seriously-- I try to just stop everything when I am sick and lie down with tea, books, wooly socks etc! And I try (try) to ask for help. Normally I would never call a friend and ask for TLC but - hey everything had to change so I changed! Instead of saying "No, No I'm really OK" and hanging up the phone and bursting into tears - I say "I'm a mess , can you please bring me some soup?"
It has been one of the hardest things for me to change - to ask for and accept help. But it has made a huge difference in my stress level and it has changed me as a human being. I realize now that everyone wants the opportunity to genuinely help someone, we all love to be able to help the person who actually wants our help! That healthy non-codie helping!!! So I am actually doing good by finally letting my friends help me.
I can't access the "more smilies" - I was going to post that big bus and say hey we're all coming over to decorate for Christmas and make hot chocolate!!
How about some marching stars then.....
Do take care, rest and recharge! I hope you feel better soon and that goes for kitty too! ((((hugs))))
peace-
b
Curled up in a good book...
Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: UK
Posts: 1,542
Again, thank you all (I really miss the thanks button!). I have depression, which is usually under control. I'm tired almost all the time right now - I think I'm still shaking the last of my illness off. His possible diabetes just overwhelmed me. I'm starting to feel less stressed about it (breathing helps!) and I was really interested to hear about your friend's cat from you barb. I googled some more and it is sinking in. Diabetes is treatable and I can do this if I have to. I over reacted rather than acted. I need to wait and see what happens next week. Its hard when I've had him since he was 8 weeks old (he's 11 now) - he's my kitten and isn't allowed to get any older!! 
STBXAH hasn't shown any interest in the cats since he moved out. He did talk about taking 2 of them but that came to nothing. Too much responsibility for him I think. And he was getting them over my dead body! LOL! All 4 don't seem to miss him at all - in fact they seem happier, more outgoing etc than before. So I need to look at my motivations in considering contacting him.
The hot chocolate sounds like a good idea - come on over and join in! You might even get a cuddle from a cat or two...
STBXAH hasn't shown any interest in the cats since he moved out. He did talk about taking 2 of them but that came to nothing. Too much responsibility for him I think. And he was getting them over my dead body! LOL! All 4 don't seem to miss him at all - in fact they seem happier, more outgoing etc than before. So I need to look at my motivations in considering contacting him.
The hot chocolate sounds like a good idea - come on over and join in! You might even get a cuddle from a cat or two...
Belgian Sheepdog Adictee
Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: In Today
Posts: 6,101
You know this time of year can be depressive all by itself with gloomier weather and less sunshine.
Something that has helped me tremendously is to get some of the 'sunlight' bulbs and put them in the lamps in the rooms I use the most.
It has helped me the last 3 winters that I have used them.
Just a thought.
Love and hugs,
Something that has helped me tremendously is to get some of the 'sunlight' bulbs and put them in the lamps in the rooms I use the most.
It has helped me the last 3 winters that I have used them.
Just a thought.
Love and hugs,
A jug fills drop by drop
Join Date: Nov 2008
Posts: 6,784
Dolce on the left is superbrave!! nd never complained much even when she was hurting. She was found wandering the streets and she was about to put to sleep when the Bach flower therapist I attend told the neighbor (the woman who picked her up) that she was going to try find a home for her... she already had 6 cats. I tried taking Dolce out on the street (in my arms) and she always got sooooooooooo fearful, now I even leave the door open and she won't get out.
Gabanna on the right is one out of 6 kitties, so far none besides Gabanna have been adopted. The animal protection woman told me she may put to sleep the other 5
and asked me to take her and the pets in my car if she decides so... for now I try helping her with cat food... its so sad but as my bf says, if humans treat each other iin horrible ways, how can we expect them to treat animals?
I feel bad when I think of little Dolce a few weeks old wandering the streets alone she is sooo sweet, motherly and elegant, sometimes I think my soul is like that too, wandering in dark alleys....... but the cat is way more intelligent.... because when offered something better she is graceful, grateful and takes it, while I see the light and I stay in the dark alley UGH LOL
December has always sucked for me, wake me up next Spring.
Gabanna on the right is one out of 6 kitties, so far none besides Gabanna have been adopted. The animal protection woman told me she may put to sleep the other 5
and asked me to take her and the pets in my car if she decides so... for now I try helping her with cat food... its so sad but as my bf says, if humans treat each other iin horrible ways, how can we expect them to treat animals? I feel bad when I think of little Dolce a few weeks old wandering the streets alone
she is sooo sweet, motherly and elegant, sometimes I think my soul is like that too, wandering in dark alleys....... but the cat is way more intelligent.... because when offered something better she is graceful, grateful and takes it, while I see the light and I stay in the dark alley UGH LOLDecember has always sucked for me, wake me up next Spring.
Curled up in a good book...
Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: UK
Posts: 1,542
Its official
Just back from the vets - my boy has diabetes and has had his first insulin injection this morning. He's actually a little perkier than normal for this time of day! It doesn't look too scary to inject him and I'll find the money for his treatment from somewhere.
He's 11, he's my kitten and I love him! I'll try insert a photo - but he is being very insistent that I come play with him RIGHT NOW and getting between me and the keyboard so it might not work!
Thanks for your support everyone and Laurie - I've been using a light box for about 3 years and it does help (when I remember to use it)! Thanks for the reminder.
I'm not telling STBXAH - he hasn't been even slightly concerned about the cats for over a year now. I'm not prepared to contact him about this. It might not be 'fair' but I just can't handle dealing with him right now.
He's 11, he's my kitten and I love him! I'll try insert a photo - but he is being very insistent that I come play with him RIGHT NOW and getting between me and the keyboard so it might not work!
Thanks for your support everyone and Laurie - I've been using a light box for about 3 years and it does help (when I remember to use it)! Thanks for the reminder.
I'm not telling STBXAH - he hasn't been even slightly concerned about the cats for over a year now. I'm not prepared to contact him about this. It might not be 'fair' but I just can't handle dealing with him right now.
Seeking Serenity
Join Date: Dec 2009
Posts: 144
Book...never mind what's fair! It's time to take care of YOU and your baby. From your post it sounds like you are getting a good handle on what needs to be done for your kitten and yourself. We are all so proud of you. Your progress is an inspiration to those of us still struggling.
Your little guy is just beautiful! I am the 'mother' of two cats myself. I could easily become that 'crazy cat lady' people joke about. I think they are so elegant and smart. I would love to have more, but my older one would not do well with an additional cat. He is so frightened all the time.
One of my goals for this new year (omg...i hate that holiday) is to become a little more active with volunteering. I will be working at my very first pet adoption of the new year at PetSmart! I've always wanted to help and decided nows the time. It will get me out of the house for a couple of hours, doesn't cost me a thing, and I will feel useful at the same time!
B-Please keep us updated on your little ones progress. Know there are many of us out here that are keeping the faith for both of you!!!
(((((hugs to you both)))))
Your little guy is just beautiful! I am the 'mother' of two cats myself. I could easily become that 'crazy cat lady' people joke about. I think they are so elegant and smart. I would love to have more, but my older one would not do well with an additional cat. He is so frightened all the time.
One of my goals for this new year (omg...i hate that holiday) is to become a little more active with volunteering. I will be working at my very first pet adoption of the new year at PetSmart! I've always wanted to help and decided nows the time. It will get me out of the house for a couple of hours, doesn't cost me a thing, and I will feel useful at the same time!
B-Please keep us updated on your little ones progress. Know there are many of us out here that are keeping the faith for both of you!!!
(((((hugs to you both)))))
Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
