sdp

Last Tuesday, my A must have realized that something is going on with me, as he informed me that he was not going to drink until Saturday, where we were ALL going over someone's house to watch the fight (wow!!). Of course, he went out Wed nite with his uncle, but HAD to go, as his uncle is heading back to the state he lives in.
He did stay home Thurs and Fri... Yesterday, I was doing a garage sale with the kids. He called and said he was going to the bar withsome friends, but would be home later.. He did show up around 5 to do something. I asked when we were going?? he then wasn't sure if it was to that house, or to another house, but he would call and let me know.
Well, you guessed it, no call, nothing. The girls were disappointed,but not too bad, as they were pretty wiped out.

It just pi$$es me off when he blows me off this way!!!He is still over there (it's now almost 10:30 am) having the time of his life, while everything is left to me!!!

The girls and I are going to see a movie in a little, tho. Dickie Robert,Former Child Star. It looks pretty silly, but that's what I need!!!

However, I did have other plans that are now blown apart. Since he's not here to watch the kids, I can't do them.

I also have to call over there to enlist the babysitting services of one of their kids for tomorrow. However, I will have my daughter call(she doesn't know he's there) as she is their favorite babysitter, and is a responsible kid.

Another friend went over the same house last nite, and he was there. Actually this is pretty funny-- when I asked my A why he went back on his promise not to drink until Sat, he said it was a statement, not a promise... I asked the friend to tell him, if he was there, why he didn't call me, was it a statement, etc... Well, the friend did, but, surprisingly enough, got no response.

Anyway, I know how this day will end. He will not sneak home until he is sure we will all be asleep(he will not come home during the daylight hours) Maybe he'll go to work tomorrow, maybe not.
He has been missing a lot of work, and I think got in trouble 2 weeks ago.

Well, need to get ready for the show and then grocery shopping ( another peeve- I always go grocery shopping on sundays and HATE taking the kids,as I spend too much money.does that matter? NO!!)

Grumble grumble grumble... I think I will take the complete ignoring approach. There's nothing left to say, as I have said it all!!!

(Where's the headbanging smiley when I need him!!!)

smoke gets in my eyes

Kill him.

Ooops. Wrong forum. Okay. Ummm.....

It sucks. He sucks.

Dang... where is that alanon answer?

Er.... Good for you for being adapatable enough to rescue the day with your kids. Buy yourself a treat at the grocery.

Hugs!
Smoke

Gabe

very good. But it would be messy and no doubt involve criminal charges and prison time.
I think your best defense to this behavior is a good offense.
Make your own plans, live your own life. Don't count on him to be there to help you with the kids, because he has proven that he won't be. If your plans don't include him or depend on him for help, he can't disappoint you.
Peace,
Gabe

constant

I am with Smoke.....LOL, Smoke always knows what to say!

I am sorry to say that I have no better advice....I just posted a novel about how all of my plans were blown out of the water for the WHOLE weekend!!!

I guess we can look at the bright side.....we could come here and vent....then re-plan and move on.

Enjoy the day with your children....we never know when it will be our last. I am going to take the three year old to do something...even if we just get ice cream.

Blessings,
Constant

Daffodil

Dear all;

Perfect answer to "kill 'em"

Always Call your sponsor FIRST if that isn't possible
COME HERE...

Using the tools of Al-Anon always helps me "Let it be their behavior not mine"

besides I am not good at basket weaving...

Bless you all.

sdp

Smoke- what IS the right forum??

The movie was just OK. Freaky Friday was better (the girls and I see a LOT of movies. At the mall today, we did one of those movie preview polls, and it was embarrassing how many we saw!!!) I got out of the grocery store relatively unscathed, but NOT the mall....

Oh well...we had fun.. They did just make a comment about where Dad was, but I pretended I did not hear...

At least I had the car!!! Sometimes, Richard Cranium takes it, and I have to hunt it down.

Anyway, thanks all.... and I make a heck of a licence plate!!!

LongStrangeTrip

Hang in there girl. Keep investing time in those little girls and yourself! Even if you find yourself doing it just to keep you all busy and not thinking about what he's doing or where he is, keep doing it. I'm sure the girls are enjoying all of this time with Mommy.
My husband spent the majority of the day with his buddies at the footbal game. This all started at 7:30am this morning with HIS wake up call to go tailgating! YEP! 7:30am! I had a migraine from my sinus and boy was I cussing and throwing a fit! Not about the tailgating though, about the friend calling and waking me up so early and in turn waking up my Mom and my 7 year old.
I spent the rest of the day...once the ibuprofen kicked in anyway...shopping for paint and new things for my daughter's bedroom. We had a pretty good time and honestly? I didn't think about him at all. It is getting so much easier to just find my own things to do and forget him all day long and what he's doing.

osier59

I seem to recall that one of the old timers here had a good answer for when the A really ticked her off:

Kick 'em in the shins.

Probably can't do that either, but it makes ya smile!

O59

sdp

Shins?? I was thinking a little higher...

Thanks again, all...

LST- this booze started about 1pm YESTERDAY.. Have not heard a peep, and Da Bears are on, so there's no way he'll be home before we go to bed.(sunday is football, after all!!!)

My one daughter is bummed because she can't kiss him good night..

sdp

I hope Da Bears lose....heh heh heh

smoke gets in my eyes

hey sdp?

I've been musing this evening about what sdp stands for. I mean, realistically, I guess it's your initials... but I've had fun guessing anyway.

My favorites were "Sure Did Peek" and "So Darned Pissed".

sdp

So darn pissed does sound good, but it is my initials, maiden name initials yet...

sdp

Anyway, he snuck in about 4:00am today (monday) I heard him, but did not say anything, just got up and got ready for work. I called to talk to the girls. HE answers. I told him i had notihng to say to him and to get off the phone. He said he wanted to apologize, but I said there was no way he could, and please put one of the girls on.

Jerk.

Sarah2003

Just reading this thread, and cracking up. You all are so funny. You're like my alter-ego.....saying (writing) what I want to say, but am too afraid to say it!

sdp.....when I stopped trying different *approaches* with my AH, I became much more happy. Even at peace. Once I stopped focusing on his behaviors, and took care of me and my children, my life became much more manageable. Still crazy at times, but more relaxed. It sounds like you're doing what you should be doing....planning your time with your girls.

Also, the humor does help tremendously! Keep it up, ladies!

sdp

Sarah--
This is a FREQUENT occurrence. It doesn't usually bother me as much as it does this week... end...

Just the blatant disregard of our plans..

sdp

Got interrupted,sorry...
Anyway, he tells me that he promised the girls that he would never be away for a day like that again... WHAT?!?!?!?
That was a lousy promise to make. Hopefully, he can keep it, but I won't hold my breath...
GGGRRRRRRR