I.knew.it!!!!!

Old 11-02-2009, 11:14 AM
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I.knew.it!!!!!

My AH who hasn't lived here for over two weeks had told my son he was going to take him to dinner tonight. I get a text from him saying he can't cuz he don't feel good. I already told my son he might not follow through so try not to be disappointed. My son said he really didn't want to go anyway and see him right now.

I'm upset that my AH broke that promise to my son.

Now my question because I'm trying to do no contact. Should I not even acknowledge the text and not reply to my AH? I'll tell my son when he comes home from school. I feel like texting him back, my nice self, and say what about tomorrow night.

I think I just want to not text him. I don't want to know how he is feeling. I don't want to know anything. He probably didn't go to work because football was on yesterday and beer and football go together. Plus after all the phone calls he made to me Saturday night till 3:00 I don't feel like responding at all. Yesterday I did good by not texting him at all. I was mad. He was drunk and still yelling at me even though he's not here. Today I vowed I wasn't going to text him so I think I should stay with that. If he wants to take him tomorrow then he can text back and say that.

I think I answered my own question. Thanks guys for listening and letting me vent. lol

Now off to cut coupons and do my food shopping list then go food shopping. I think I'll make something both kids really like. don't know yet but i'll wait till they get home from school and ask them.
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Old 11-02-2009, 11:56 AM
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I think you DID answer your own question, VR! That was so cute!

IMHO, if you humor him by texting him back, he'll think he has free reign to text now that he's gotten a response out of you. He's pushing your the button that is your son. But you did the right thing by preparing your son for the possibility that his dad might not show up.

Well done!
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Old 11-02-2009, 12:26 PM
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This is business as usual for my STXAH.

If my STXAH wants a response to a question I will text him back with a simple OK or a NO. And leave it at that. No explaination. No conversation. I have boundries on things I will talk about - I only talk or text about the kids now. He's gotton used to it. In the past he used to text, and text and text and ask me what I was doing, how I was doing, etc. etc. etc. Frankly, that is none of his business and I don't ask about his business either (I don't care anymore anyway). Once he was texting me from the bar (about a year ago) and was having a good joke about it as his single female "bar buddy" (the one he spent the night with a number of times and lied about it while we were together) was sitting with him reading it too. I provided a lot of entertainment that night I suppose. I texted something nasty about her (no, I didn't know she was reading the text, but so what - I'm his wife and she shouldn't have been reading it anyway - her choice to read his private message) and he came home in a rage yelling "how could you do that to me?" He wouldn't answer but kept repeating it in his drunkin speech. I couldn't understand what I had done, and then I figured it out. I embarassed him and made HIM look like a fool when I was the one who was supposed to look like the fool. Ever since that time I never trusted him when he texted or calls as he likes to play mind games on people and I never know who he is sharing his "joking" with. I'm done being the butt and fool or his jokes.

Sorry got off track. Anyhow, If he says he can't make it when he promised (did this again just now, he can't show up - again for whatever reason), I leave it at that. The kids have excepted that he will not come through with most promises anyway. Its sad really, but of course he blames the kids because now they don't bother calling him anymore and he says they think he's a monster and they don't care about HIM (who' the child here?). He said to call him anytime and he'll be there. Well, after my oldest tried five times to call and talk to him and different times my oldest gave up as he will not answer 99% of the time and will not return a voice mail until the next day.
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