TimeForMe

Hi all -

I mostly lurk but have found strength and understanding from your posts, so thanks.

AH is on day 11 of in-patient rehab. I am very happy about that because if he didn't go, I was leaving.

He drank so much one night he had a seizure (first time) and went to the hospital but left before they treated him. That's when I said it was over. Because I told him that, his mother and her boyfriend have taken the stance that I left him in his "time of need".

They told him he did not need to be in rehab and if he just left me, his problems would be solved. :wtf2

So I am here trying to hold everything together by myself. I'm not sure if we're going to work it out. I told him I wouldn't make any major decisions until he gets out.

Anyone have any advice? It's difficult to talk about this with family and friends. I feel like if I could have a big ol' cry-fest, I might feel a little better, but it just won't happen.

I am very glad he's getting help, but the path that got us here just sucks and his family is ridiculous.

Thanks, everyone.

intheknow

Oh, my dear...I could have written this.

Mine is out. Still no decision. Taking things one day, one hour at a time. Sometimes a minute at a time.

This time of need crap is all bs - from enablers to him. You are in need too, and this is your time of need. And guess what? He isn't here for you either, and neither are they. The only one who truly is there for you in times like this is...YOU.

So be healthy, get strong, follow your heart, figure out what you want. You deserve it.

Redux

They clearly don't understand enabling. I don't think you can do anything to convince someone like that except give them a copy of the book "Codependent No More" with a note that says you're trying to help him recover from alcoholism and they are hurting him by their words and actions.

Then give them a swift kick.

Stick to your guns. You're doing what is RIGHT. They are doing what is CONVENIENT.