Don't know if I belong here...
Member
Join Date: Aug 2007
Posts: 72
Originally Posted by imtheidiot 
I think that I'm going to have to start being very "broke" soon, and stash money away. It's difficult because he keeps spending on things for the home and insists that I owe him for half, since we should be splitting things down the middle.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2005
Location: where the streets have no name
Posts: 1,078
Switching from jack daniels to beer believing it will be better, easier, or say "non alcoholic" is one of the things alcoholics do to rationalize the existence of a problem.
jack daniels = ethanol
beer = ethanol
whiskey = ethanol
gin = ethanol
vodka = ethanol
It is ALL alcohol.
Believing because they make it to work they cannot be an alcoholic is another delusion.
The list goes on and on...... ......... .......... as do the behaviors, blame, progression;
The question is "how long do you want to go on dealing with it?
jack daniels = ethanol
beer = ethanol
whiskey = ethanol
gin = ethanol
vodka = ethanol
It is ALL alcohol.
Believing because they make it to work they cannot be an alcoholic is another delusion.
The list goes on and on...... ......... .......... as do the behaviors, blame, progression;
The question is "how long do you want to go on dealing with it?
Member
Join Date: Sep 2008
Location: Wizard Land Downunder
Posts: 2,615
I don't live with my ABF, we each have our own unit in a pensioner complex, but we share meals, our car and lots of other interests. We split purchases down the middle, BUT we both KNOW what we are getting into BEFORE we buy anything.
You are not obliged to fork out for things he has bought without your knowledge, and his doing this is a form of manipulation. Tell him you are finished with that, and in future if he does not discuss it with you beforehand, you WILL NOT BE PAYING a cent.
As for household expenses, you also are responsible for HALF as is he. How much you earn really doesn't matter. Tell him you are paying your student loan and bills and will pay half the expenses and he also half.
His personal bills or loans are not yours, so let him pay or not...his problem.
I hate to tell you that alcoholism does NOT get better or easier to live with, on the contrary it gets worse, much worse and harder than you want to imagine.
God bless
You are not obliged to fork out for things he has bought without your knowledge, and his doing this is a form of manipulation. Tell him you are finished with that, and in future if he does not discuss it with you beforehand, you WILL NOT BE PAYING a cent.
As for household expenses, you also are responsible for HALF as is he. How much you earn really doesn't matter. Tell him you are paying your student loan and bills and will pay half the expenses and he also half.
His personal bills or loans are not yours, so let him pay or not...his problem.
I hate to tell you that alcoholism does NOT get better or easier to live with, on the contrary it gets worse, much worse and harder than you want to imagine.
God bless
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