update
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Sep 2009
Location: around the riverbend in the boonedocks, USA
Posts: 56
update
My x left rehab last wednesday, 5 days ago. So far so good!!!!!
He is staying at his sisters, about 4 mi. away from my house. He stops by in the evening to visit the girls, and they are loving it. My youngest was a bit upset Friday night, when she found out daddy wasn't going to stay all night, and sleep with her.
My mother called me a few days in this five day period, trying to find something out. She first wanted me to know that he was back, and why didn't I tell her. For one I didn't tell her, cause she worries to much about other people's problems more then her own, and to I just didn't think I needed to. I think I told my dad and one friend.... the rest I figured would find out in time.
On Saturday night, I was planning on taking the girls to a drive in movie therater about an hour north and I asked thier dad if he wanted to come. It was the best time, we all really enjoyed it!!!
My mother called the next morning wanting to know if "HE" went. I just sighed..... Later that morning when I went over to her house to pick up my niece, she was like "so did you get any action last night?! I flat out told her NO, I didn't, we just did something with our kids, for fun!!! I didn't hang out long, my mother looks for the scoop and then analyzes it to the negative!
But back to my X recoverying husband and I, it's so nice to have him back around and sober. On Sunday I had about an hour of fear, that he was going to come by and be drunk! BUT when he came by he had been with his sister and grandma out to eat at the hotel, and was going for a motorcycle ride, and would be back before bed, to read the girl a bedtime story.
I don't know, I know I have to be careful, and not forget things, and remember this is kind of like the honeymoon phase of recovery, six months in recovery community, and 5 days out. BUT boy it feels nice, I pray that recovery will continue.... life is good for the moment!
He is staying at his sisters, about 4 mi. away from my house. He stops by in the evening to visit the girls, and they are loving it. My youngest was a bit upset Friday night, when she found out daddy wasn't going to stay all night, and sleep with her.
My mother called me a few days in this five day period, trying to find something out. She first wanted me to know that he was back, and why didn't I tell her. For one I didn't tell her, cause she worries to much about other people's problems more then her own, and to I just didn't think I needed to. I think I told my dad and one friend.... the rest I figured would find out in time.
On Saturday night, I was planning on taking the girls to a drive in movie therater about an hour north and I asked thier dad if he wanted to come. It was the best time, we all really enjoyed it!!!
My mother called the next morning wanting to know if "HE" went. I just sighed..... Later that morning when I went over to her house to pick up my niece, she was like "so did you get any action last night?! I flat out told her NO, I didn't, we just did something with our kids, for fun!!! I didn't hang out long, my mother looks for the scoop and then analyzes it to the negative!
But back to my X recoverying husband and I, it's so nice to have him back around and sober. On Sunday I had about an hour of fear, that he was going to come by and be drunk! BUT when he came by he had been with his sister and grandma out to eat at the hotel, and was going for a motorcycle ride, and would be back before bed, to read the girl a bedtime story.
I don't know, I know I have to be careful, and not forget things, and remember this is kind of like the honeymoon phase of recovery, six months in recovery community, and 5 days out. BUT boy it feels nice, I pray that recovery will continue.... life is good for the moment!
Member
Join Date: Jan 2009
Posts: 1,888
life is good for the moment!
That's the way, one moment at a time, one day at a time.
You just keep doing what is right for you and your kids and let your Higher Power deal with what the future holds. No expectations.
If you worry about it all crashing, you'll miss out on the good days to be had. If you try to push things any certain why it's lible to backfire. Just go with the flow.
So glad to hear you all doing well!!
Alice
That's the way, one moment at a time, one day at a time.
You just keep doing what is right for you and your kids and let your Higher Power deal with what the future holds. No expectations.
If you worry about it all crashing, you'll miss out on the good days to be had. If you try to push things any certain why it's lible to backfire. Just go with the flow.
So glad to hear you all doing well!!
Alice
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Sep 2009
Location: around the riverbend in the boonedocks, USA
Posts: 56
I don't actively attend al-non, I have in the past. I do read alot of thier books and magizine's.
I am a very co-dependent person. I think highly of what my parents and family think of my life!! I'm trying to over come that!
For example with my x. I still love him, and he says he still loves me, and didn't really want to get a divorce, but I felt at the time that was the only thing to do, with him being a RAH.
Now that he is kind of "back to his old self" it's so nice. I'm working really hard on my feelings. Because seeing him like this, and doing things with him and the kids, is so nice. I want to say I LOVE YOU, and make life normal in one house. BUT I know his road to recovery is still a long travel, and he needs to be on his own and find a job, and get a place to find himself more. He says he want the girls and I in his life. I pray that that theory will stay as well as recovery.
For my mother. She is a active acoholic. She has been since I was little. There was a point in my life, where she would "party" and sleep on the couch or bed, for days. I was the "mother hen" I still have that in me, and I try to recognize that. To be only my childrens and my own hen. I've gotten better at it. I've gotten better at listening to people and thier problems, and just listening, and not raging out or/and giving adivce. Thinking more about myself and my life, how I'm truly grateful for the way the Lord has shown me my path, and pray that other's I care for will find thier path to a healthy life.
Again for my mother, I keep my distance, and it eat's at my family the way she reacts to things, and lives her life. I've given her books, and told her about meetings and all types of things, but she can only do it for herself. She's my mother and I love her, but I don't have to like her and her actions, and thoughts on matters.
I do worry about the what if.... what if things go good with my x and I, and things can be worked out, like they should have long ago. I worry about what people will say. But as he tells me, it should only matter to me, it's my sitituation, with him. I just have been very open to people, like my father, sisters and friends, in the past, in the dark times, that I think they are very protective of me, and my situation, and fear for me.
I hope it's not like that forever, one day at a time, right?
I am a very co-dependent person. I think highly of what my parents and family think of my life!! I'm trying to over come that!
For example with my x. I still love him, and he says he still loves me, and didn't really want to get a divorce, but I felt at the time that was the only thing to do, with him being a RAH.
Now that he is kind of "back to his old self" it's so nice. I'm working really hard on my feelings. Because seeing him like this, and doing things with him and the kids, is so nice. I want to say I LOVE YOU, and make life normal in one house. BUT I know his road to recovery is still a long travel, and he needs to be on his own and find a job, and get a place to find himself more. He says he want the girls and I in his life. I pray that that theory will stay as well as recovery.
For my mother. She is a active acoholic. She has been since I was little. There was a point in my life, where she would "party" and sleep on the couch or bed, for days. I was the "mother hen" I still have that in me, and I try to recognize that. To be only my childrens and my own hen. I've gotten better at it. I've gotten better at listening to people and thier problems, and just listening, and not raging out or/and giving adivce. Thinking more about myself and my life, how I'm truly grateful for the way the Lord has shown me my path, and pray that other's I care for will find thier path to a healthy life.
Again for my mother, I keep my distance, and it eat's at my family the way she reacts to things, and lives her life. I've given her books, and told her about meetings and all types of things, but she can only do it for herself. She's my mother and I love her, but I don't have to like her and her actions, and thoughts on matters.
I do worry about the what if.... what if things go good with my x and I, and things can be worked out, like they should have long ago. I worry about what people will say. But as he tells me, it should only matter to me, it's my sitituation, with him. I just have been very open to people, like my father, sisters and friends, in the past, in the dark times, that I think they are very protective of me, and my situation, and fear for me.
I hope it's not like that forever, one day at a time, right?
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