Advice Needed
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2008
Location: pa
Posts: 90
Advice Needed
Hello,
I haven't been here for a while. I have really been doing well with detaching from my AH thanks to so many here on SR. I am starting to go backwards though.
To make a long story short, at this time I have chosen to stay with my AH for now. I have been detaching and so on. Except, we are going on vacation with my family this weekend for a week and I am obsessing on how he will act around them that I have myself a nervous wreck and starting to not even want to go. We are going to the beach. I know the more I obsess, the worse it gets. My whole family is so looking forward to this. My two daughters especially. There will be 21 family members going.
Please give me some advice on how to handle this. I am so worried what my family will think. They know he drinks to much, but they never down him, at least to my face. I am making the situation crazy in my head. Any advice on how to just relax and go with the flow would be much appreciated. :ghug2
Thanks,
Chris
I haven't been here for a while. I have really been doing well with detaching from my AH thanks to so many here on SR. I am starting to go backwards though.
To make a long story short, at this time I have chosen to stay with my AH for now. I have been detaching and so on. Except, we are going on vacation with my family this weekend for a week and I am obsessing on how he will act around them that I have myself a nervous wreck and starting to not even want to go. We are going to the beach. I know the more I obsess, the worse it gets. My whole family is so looking forward to this. My two daughters especially. There will be 21 family members going.
Please give me some advice on how to handle this. I am so worried what my family will think. They know he drinks to much, but they never down him, at least to my face. I am making the situation crazy in my head. Any advice on how to just relax and go with the flow would be much appreciated. :ghug2
Thanks,
Chris
Member
Join Date: Dec 2006
Location: Stumbling toward happiness
Posts: 4,706
I don't really have any good advice, Chris, but I hope you find a way to focus primarily on your family and not give him a lot of space in your thoughts. Try to immerse yourself in them, and reconnect with them as strongly as you can. Having a support system can come in handy.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2006
Posts: 5,103
It sounds like your family already knows he drinks too much so are you afraid his behavior will prompt them to wonder why you are staying with him? Have you given your own family a false sense of your reality? It sounds like you are more worried about their reaction then his behavior.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2007
Location: Between the ocean and the mountains
Posts: 653
Just be careful that on the final day of the family vacation he does not load five small children into a van and then, intoxicated, drive the wrong way on a NY freeway, killing them all.
This summer has already seen one too many tragedies because of a family's unwillingness to acknowledge the dangers of an alcoholic in their midst.
If he exhibits flat out drunken behavior, it will probably be for the best.
I hope all goes well. Be careful,
Bluejay
This summer has already seen one too many tragedies because of a family's unwillingness to acknowledge the dangers of an alcoholic in their midst.
If he exhibits flat out drunken behavior, it will probably be for the best.
I hope all goes well. Be careful,
Bluejay
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