FreeBird09

I reached my Independence day. I spent the last year taking care of myself, paying my own bills (I paid the 12th month of rent and never missed or was late on a payment) without the help of a man and I feel freer then I have ever been in my life. I march to the beat of my own drummer. To some, they have done this for themselves in the past or in between relationships. I had NEVER in my ENTIRE life paid my own way without a mans help.

I recall the last time my XABF and I went to an event, he got so drunk it was pitiful. I went to a wedding yesterday and looked around at all the people, no one (out of 200+ guests) got drunk. I thought to myself how lucky I am to have gotten OUT of the relationship with the XABF, and was contemplating thanking him, but then why give him credit for anything when in essence I struggled through this as he has drank himself into a tizzy daily in the last year, living off of his Mom and Dad (albeit he is in his 40's)

I have not as much as dated anyone in the last year, but I am considering it at this point. Slow and steady wins the race, no need to rush anything.

I am so proud of myself that I have reached this year mark. It has been a struggle that feels like it was worth it's weight in gold. I shed a lot of tears over the last year, and when I made that 12th month rent check out I cried like a baby. I put a smiley face on the 'notes' portion of the check and I might just frame it when it comes back from the bank. My son, who lives with me, gave me a high five and said how proud he is of me. My older boys and their significant others said how proud they are of me that I made it. I feel that I have paved a new path for my sons to see that they need to respect women or maybe they too will drop out of the 'race' and do it alone. If you knew where I come from, and where I am now, this year has taught my whole family a new way. I am the ONLY woman in my entire family, extended and otherwise who ever struck it out on her own.

I have a lot to be proud of. Independence Day has a whole new meaning for me.

Thank you everyone for your support. SR has been great!.

isurvived

I'm sending you a:

STANDING OVATION!

kv816

I'm standing in that ovation too.

Congrats!! I remember a few months ago when I moved out I told the person who was helping me that it scared me most because I had NEVER been on my own. Never once did I have to really do it alone. And the thought scared the crap out of me.

I am on my own now (only going into month 3 but I am on my own). And I'm loving it more than fearing it right now. I've realized over the last few months some of the things I've missed that I didn't realize I missed (such as magnets on the fridge, drinking milk with dinner, curling up on the floor with my kids watching a movie that's turned up too loud).

I hope 9 months from now I'm making the same proud announcement.

Congrats again, you're an inspiration!

FreeBird09

kv816 YOU CAN DO IT!!!!!!.. I will be here, letting you know how proud I am of you.. as time moves forward, we all fall backwards once in a while, but with each trip and fall (and catch ourselves) we gain strength and know EVEN MORE what we DON'T want in our life, and EXACTLY what we DO want,.

I call the shots in my life now. There isn't one person in this world that can turn my head to such an extent that I wear rose colored glasses again.

Thank you Trying2survive, and thank you kv816.

kv816

Thanks FreeBird. I'm feeling pretty good right now--much better than I did 3 months ago. And I hope with each month I can say I feel even stronger today than I did last month. I've got to though--I'm tired of falling backwards (my butt's gettin kinda sore).

GiveLove

((( Freebird ))) .....pretty darned good for someone who came here when life seemed like a 'sad ending', wouldn't you say? Soo proud of all you've done to rebuild your life. I know it's been hard sometimes to let him "sink or swim," but when I see all you've gained by doing that, I just smile and smile.

Pelican

((((Free Bird))))

Thank you for sharing this positive update on your life!!