Father's Day
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Join Date: Nov 2008
Location: back from the brink
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Father's Day
Today my son told me that he received a call from his dad on Monday (3 days ago) - and Dad didn't sound very good over the phone. Slurry.
He said his dad scolded him about missing Father's Day. "Why didn't you send me a card, or at least call me to wish me a Happy Father's Day?"
To which my son replied "Dad, Father's Day isn't until THIS coming Sunday."
I didn't react one way or the other, there was no need or reason. All I did say was "well, you still have time to send him a card, and it will get there in time."
To which my son said "He doesn't even know what day it is, it wouldn't matter if it was late or not."
The way it is. My thought: How lousy it is that he doesn't have a dad who is worthy of a Father's Day card.
He said his dad scolded him about missing Father's Day. "Why didn't you send me a card, or at least call me to wish me a Happy Father's Day?"
To which my son replied "Dad, Father's Day isn't until THIS coming Sunday."
I didn't react one way or the other, there was no need or reason. All I did say was "well, you still have time to send him a card, and it will get there in time."
To which my son said "He doesn't even know what day it is, it wouldn't matter if it was late or not."
The way it is. My thought: How lousy it is that he doesn't have a dad who is worthy of a Father's Day card.
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Join Date: May 2007
Location: Philadelphia, PA
Posts: 405
I'm sorry trying to survive!
Is your son in counseling or going to an Ala-teen,alanon meeting? I can only imagine that he must have a lot to process!
My thoughts and prayers are with you and your son.
Is your son in counseling or going to an Ala-teen,alanon meeting? I can only imagine that he must have a lot to process!
My thoughts and prayers are with you and your son.
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Join Date: May 2004
Location: Upstate New York
Posts: 1,636
That's sad. But you did a great job of responding in a way that didn't bash his dad or try to make any excuses...and that lets your son be free to form his make up his own mind and do what he needs to do as far as his relationship with his dad goes. So, the positive is that he has one parent who can model healthy behavior, right?
freya
freya
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Join Date: Nov 2008
Location: back from the brink
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Yes, he does go to a counselor who specializes in addiction. The counselor has become a great mentor for him and a great role model.
I know I did right by not commenting about it, but boy was it hard not to say something!!!!!!!! But I bit my tongue and "thought it" instead.
I know I did right by not commenting about it, but boy was it hard not to say something!!!!!!!! But I bit my tongue and "thought it" instead.
[QUOTE=Trying2survive;2267269]Today my son told me that he received a call from his dad on Monday (3 days ago) - and Dad didn't sound very good over the phone. Slurry.
He said his dad scolded him about missing Father's Day. "Why didn't you send me a card, or at least call me to wish me a Happy Father's Day?"
To which my son replied "Dad, Father's Day isn't until THIS coming Sunday."
I didn't react one way or the other, there was no need or reason. All I did say was "well, you still have time to send him a card, and it will get there in time."
To which my son said "He doesn't even know what day it is, it wouldn't matter if it was late or not."
The way it is. My thought: How lousy it is that he doesn't have a dad who is worthy of a Father's Day card.[/QUOTE]
I don't have one who is worthy either, it is pretty lousy.
He said his dad scolded him about missing Father's Day. "Why didn't you send me a card, or at least call me to wish me a Happy Father's Day?"
To which my son replied "Dad, Father's Day isn't until THIS coming Sunday."
I didn't react one way or the other, there was no need or reason. All I did say was "well, you still have time to send him a card, and it will get there in time."
To which my son said "He doesn't even know what day it is, it wouldn't matter if it was late or not."
The way it is. My thought: How lousy it is that he doesn't have a dad who is worthy of a Father's Day card.[/QUOTE]
I don't have one who is worthy either, it is pretty lousy.
Trying, good for you for realizing those are already muddy waters. My mom never badmouthed my dad and I am very grateful, I have too many issues with him as it is.
It should be very difficult to see reality versus the dream you had about his dad, to me it would be heart breaking but remember you have nothing to do there and your son will always know who was really there for him.
Please keep the good work up, protect your son.. then come here and vent all you wish with us. ((hugs))
It should be very difficult to see reality versus the dream you had about his dad, to me it would be heart breaking but remember you have nothing to do there and your son will always know who was really there for him.
Please keep the good work up, protect your son.. then come here and vent all you wish with us. ((hugs))
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