A new sense of hope
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Dec 2008
Posts: 38
A new sense of hope
I woke up today with a different perspective on my dad's "single man" habits and his alcoholism. Both me and my mother suspect that my dad has cheated on my mom and/or has approached another woman in a manner a married man should not. At this point we are both num to the situation because it's getting old. If he thinks he can have his cake, and eat it too, then he has another thing coming.
My mom basically took care of him because he was a poor excuse of a man and husband, and still is, to find a job and make money. While my mom works, he is off hanging in the streets while we get the bad feeling he is doing something he shouldn't. Right now I tell my mom everything will fall into place. She is gearing up the separation papers for him to "hopefully" sign, not that he has no reason not too. He is up for some jail time due to charges against him and depending on how long he is in there, that would be the separation period my mom is planning on getting. After he gets out then she will have the divorce papers and he will be out of her life!
He now drinks day and night and its pathetic watching this "man" my "father" slowly kill himself and not think my mom has a good enough reason to divorce him. He calls her names in front of me, disrespectful to me, my mom, and the household, and takes us for granted; he doesn't deserve us, and he needs to go!
I just want the best for my mom!
My mom basically took care of him because he was a poor excuse of a man and husband, and still is, to find a job and make money. While my mom works, he is off hanging in the streets while we get the bad feeling he is doing something he shouldn't. Right now I tell my mom everything will fall into place. She is gearing up the separation papers for him to "hopefully" sign, not that he has no reason not too. He is up for some jail time due to charges against him and depending on how long he is in there, that would be the separation period my mom is planning on getting. After he gets out then she will have the divorce papers and he will be out of her life!
He now drinks day and night and its pathetic watching this "man" my "father" slowly kill himself and not think my mom has a good enough reason to divorce him. He calls her names in front of me, disrespectful to me, my mom, and the household, and takes us for granted; he doesn't deserve us, and he needs to go!
I just want the best for my mom!
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Join Date: Nov 2008
Location: back from the brink
Posts: 457
Bless you for being supportive for your mom.
My son could have written this very post, as he's been in the same situation. It's not an easy spot to be in — seeing your father in alcoholism and the pain it causes the entire family. My son said the best thing that his dad ever taught him was what NOT to be — an alcoholic.
Sending ((((((((((hugs))))))))))) to you and your mom.
My son could have written this very post, as he's been in the same situation. It's not an easy spot to be in — seeing your father in alcoholism and the pain it causes the entire family. My son said the best thing that his dad ever taught him was what NOT to be — an alcoholic.
Sending ((((((((((hugs))))))))))) to you and your mom.
Member
Join Date: May 2009
Posts: 182
You are being so mature in seeing what the situation is and dealing with it with compassion and grace. My husband did the same stuff, but the kids pitied him and protected him from my refusal to enable him. They did the enabling for me once I stopped, and they don't see that our separation/divorce was a result of his alcoholism nor do they see him as irresponsible, although they do say they don't agree with his behavior. Your mom is lucky to have you.
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