Atir

I'm new here and have not posted anything before. I came across this site while in desperation with my husband. We have only been married for 6 months and he had been sober for a year at that stage. Within 2 months he had a slip and since then has drunk every 4 weeks. Each time I walk out and stay with family and one time I went overseas. When he drinks it goes on for days with just drinking and sleeping (no night or day). He gets argumentative and intimitating and gets into the poor me's. When he finally pulls himself together he is always sorry and wants me back to help him. I am finding it harder and harder to come back and never know what to do as I love him dearly.

This last time decided I needed to get some support and also had to find ways that if he drinks then he leaves. Some of this I have done. He is also trying to do things differently by going to the doctor who has put him on anti-depresants and also antabuse and he is getting some counselling. He is now trying to make it up to me and is feeling guilty about drinking. I have decided to tell him how much it hurts me and I don't care if it hurts. I feel he needs to know. The biggest problem is know what the right thing to do it.

I think this forum is excellent as I don't feel alone anymore, THANK YOU!!. I need to find a alanon meeting that I can fit into my week and I need to keep coming back here often.

smoke gets in my eyes

Welcome Atir!

I'm glad you found us. Be sure to tell us all about your first meeting.

Keep posting.
Hugs,
Smoke

Morning Glory

Welcome to the forum Atir.

Hugs,
MG

nakonc

I'm glad you are here. You never need to be alone again.
I was also desperate and alone when I joined Al-Anon, but now I have many friends who offer me support and understanding like no other person in my life.

Hugs

Natasha

liddy

Atir
keep doing the things that are good for you.
try as we might we cannot save them from the disease of alcoholism. At least he has realized he has a problem and
that is a step in the right direction for him.
Keep coming back
hugs
liddy

LongStrangeTrip

I'm sorry that you had to come here but I'm glad you found this place, as I did less than a week ago.
I am not able to get to meetings every night but coming here has really helped me a lot when I can't go.

kitkat

Atir,
You are doing the right thing. You can't let his alcoholism run your life. Your first priority is you, no matter how much you feel guilty about not helping him. There is nothing you can do, he has to take care of himself.

I am new to this forum as well. My husband relapsed 8 years ago and it's been an up and down trip ever since. I've just about had it as well and it's really hard to deal with him especially when he just wants us to be nice to each other.

This is a great place to vent or just to get reassurance that you are not alone or to know that what you feel inside isn't crazy. Often times after talking with him, I would begin to think that I was imagining things. But I'm not - it's the alcohol that is running our lives and I have to keep understanding that or else I lose whatever common sense I have.

Keep coming back and let us know how you are doing!

Be strong!