CNMC2C

From my posts in the past, some of you know that I have never confronted my XABF about the things that he was doing behind my back while still in the relationship with him. I instead chose to take the high road and cut off communication with him. While I know that this is the best course of action for me to take, I'm still dealing with a lot of crazy feelings, including anger. The high road is a new territory that I am traveling, so I've been trying to find ways to deal with the feelings that I have in a healthy manner. Anyway, my psychologist suggested today that I get a tape recorder and stand in front of a mirror and pretend that I am standing in front of my XABF and that I have 5 minutes to tell him exactly what I think of him while taping the entire episode. I am then supposed to replay it for 30 minutes a day for the next few weeks. She said that this might be a way to help me to eventually work thru my anger and let go of it. They use this method with OCD patients to help them get thru some of the issues of their disorder. So, I thought...what the heck....I'll try it tonight. I stood in front of my mirror and taped my 5 minutes of telling my XABF exactly what I thought about him and have been listening to it for the last 30 minutes. For the first few minutes, I was a little shocked at the anger, then I started crying, and now I'm sitting here ....just a little exhausted. My psychologist and my hope is that I get to the point where the tape that I'm playing gets so tiresome, that I am eventually able to let the anger go and move forward. If this helps me to get to the next level of my recovery...no matter how silly it sounds....I'm willing to try it. Just thought I'd share. Take Care.

GiveLove

CNMC2C,

What a brilliant thing to do. I wish I'd thought of that when I was holding all those tapes inside!! Keep up the great healing, lady

GL

bookwyrm

Wow, that sounds like a great idea! Thanks for sharing.

JenT1968

I love it when people post the practical things that have helped them. thank you so much for this,
xxx

catlovermi

Thank you so much for sharing this idea. I think many people are going to find it useful, myself included.

In my journey, THE hardest thing in distancing myself from the A was coming to terms with the fact that I had to build my own closure from the damage, and figure out how to do it. Any thoughts of getting closure with/from them was utterly futile. This is a fantastic, practical tip/tool toward self-engineered closure.

CLMI