PREGNANT! Uh oh.....
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Aug 2008
Location: Bend OR
Posts: 197
PREGNANT! Uh oh.....
In the midst of T just getting himself together - only on Day 6. I just found out I am PREGNANT! I am panicking. I can't hide it from him. I don't want him to stress and relapse. This will be our 3rd pregnancy - the other two were miscarriages.
HELP!?!
HELP!?!
Living in a Pinkful Place
Join Date: May 2006
Location: Louisiana
Posts: 7,545
Congratulations on the pregnancy!!!
Sweetie - You can tell him whenever you feel it is a good time or not tell him -but please remember the three C's
You didn't cause it
You can't control it
You can't cure it
No matter what you do, say or don't do or say - it has nothing to do with his relapses - that is him and his journey
If we could say something to make them relapse - then we could easily say something to get them sober -
Please Sweetie - try to concentrate all your thoughts on taking care of you and your baby -
prayers for the best health for you and your little one,
HUGS (hope, unity, gratitude & serenity)
Rita
Sweetie - You can tell him whenever you feel it is a good time or not tell him -but please remember the three C's
You didn't cause it
You can't control it
You can't cure it
No matter what you do, say or don't do or say - it has nothing to do with his relapses - that is him and his journey
If we could say something to make them relapse - then we could easily say something to get them sober -
Please Sweetie - try to concentrate all your thoughts on taking care of you and your baby -
prayers for the best health for you and your little one,
HUGS (hope, unity, gratitude & serenity)
Rita
Last edited by MsPINKAcres; 11-14-2008 at 10:02 AM. Reason: forgot part of my sentence
To Thine Own Self Be True
Join Date: Jun 2008
Location: So Cal
Posts: 1,946
Oh Wow honey, that is huge!
Well, to be blunt, the way you have to think of this is that this is YOUR pregnancy.
There is no guarantee he will be there for you financially or emotionally during the pregnancy or throughout this child's life.
In my opinion, that is how you have to look at this.
Take care of you and the baby now. Truly, you can not cure or control his addictions so it is time to get to work on on a plan for your and the baby's future.
I wish you the VERY best and you know that we are here for you. :ghug
Well, to be blunt, the way you have to think of this is that this is YOUR pregnancy.
There is no guarantee he will be there for you financially or emotionally during the pregnancy or throughout this child's life.
In my opinion, that is how you have to look at this.
Take care of you and the baby now. Truly, you can not cure or control his addictions so it is time to get to work on on a plan for your and the baby's future.
I wish you the VERY best and you know that we are here for you. :ghug
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Aug 2008
Location: Bend OR
Posts: 197
Thank you! That calmed me down a little bit. With three total miscarriages I don't if I am scared to tell him, or scared to go through it again.
Phew! Ok. Deep Breath. I am VERY early - like only 3 weeks and 4 days along. I am not due for my period until next Tuesday! I took a test this morning because I was crying for no apparent reason! Hahaha. I knew it! Im a pro at this point with 3 pregs under my belt!
Ok. Ok. Ok. Thank you everyone. I just don't know what to do as of right now..... I always go to the Dr. since I am considered high risk, but it ends up stressing me out more.
Should I go and have the monitoring done? All the appts and blood tests in case there is something they can do to make it stick? Or should I just let it ride?
Phew! Ok. Deep Breath. I am VERY early - like only 3 weeks and 4 days along. I am not due for my period until next Tuesday! I took a test this morning because I was crying for no apparent reason! Hahaha. I knew it! Im a pro at this point with 3 pregs under my belt!
Ok. Ok. Ok. Thank you everyone. I just don't know what to do as of right now..... I always go to the Dr. since I am considered high risk, but it ends up stressing me out more.
Should I go and have the monitoring done? All the appts and blood tests in case there is something they can do to make it stick? Or should I just let it ride?
To Thine Own Self Be True
Join Date: Jun 2008
Location: So Cal
Posts: 1,946
Ugh, I do not know the answer to this one.
What would make you feel better?
Maybe you should just relax and take it easy until at least after your period is due.
Obviously avoid alcohol and take care of yourself.
You do NOT need stress right now.
If I may ask, when (what weeks) did your miscarriages occur?
What would make you feel better?
Maybe you should just relax and take it easy until at least after your period is due.
Obviously avoid alcohol and take care of yourself.
You do NOT need stress right now.
If I may ask, when (what weeks) did your miscarriages occur?
Living in a Pinkful Place
Join Date: May 2006
Location: Louisiana
Posts: 7,545
are you able to schedule something like a consultation or a phone appt with your dr or maybe the nurse?
Maybe talk with them as what they suggest? Then you can seek guidance from your HP and make an informed decision as to what is the best thing for you to do
Yes, my friend - deep breaths - one day at a time -
First thing first and what is the Next Right Thing for YOU
I personally have never been thru this experience with a high risk pregnancy and miscarriages but I can only imagine how stress that must be.
Sending out lots of prayers of comfort & peace for you
Maybe talk with them as what they suggest? Then you can seek guidance from your HP and make an informed decision as to what is the best thing for you to do
Yes, my friend - deep breaths - one day at a time -
First thing first and what is the Next Right Thing for YOU
I personally have never been thru this experience with a high risk pregnancy and miscarriages but I can only imagine how stress that must be.
Sending out lots of prayers of comfort & peace for you
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Aug 2008
Location: Bend OR
Posts: 197
TTOSBT
My first m/c was @ 13 weeks - well we went in @ 13 to see the heartbeat and it had died at 9 weeks. My second I was only 5 wks, and 2 days, and the third m/c was at 9 weeks naturally.
I am a smoker and want to quit but am soooo stressed that I don't know if at this point it would be better to cut down slowly to lessen the stress or just to stop....
My first died right when I quit smoking. The Dr. said that sometimes you can actually put the fetus in nicotine withdrawals just quitting cold turkey - which is scary too. Ugh.
My first m/c was @ 13 weeks - well we went in @ 13 to see the heartbeat and it had died at 9 weeks. My second I was only 5 wks, and 2 days, and the third m/c was at 9 weeks naturally.
I am a smoker and want to quit but am soooo stressed that I don't know if at this point it would be better to cut down slowly to lessen the stress or just to stop....
My first died right when I quit smoking. The Dr. said that sometimes you can actually put the fetus in nicotine withdrawals just quitting cold turkey - which is scary too. Ugh.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Aug 2008
Location: Bend OR
Posts: 197
Thank you Japic. Yeah I can call them. I was thinking of waiting until Monday though. Just to see if my period starts as chemical pregnancies are common. It's just where the egg is fertilized but it doesnt implant enough and you essentailly have what most women think is a late period.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: Kentucky
Posts: 46
Hugs and prayers -- as everyone says -- take care of yourself and don't stress. This is about you and your well-being -- no one else's. Just let go and turn it over to your Higher Power. We're all rooting for you!
Member
Join Date: Jul 2008
Posts: 207
Our higher power works things out better than we are able to. Perhaps this pregnancy is meant to be.......for you or for him, or both.
Sending prayers your way!! I know you love him, and want SO badly for him to come around......my prayers are with that happening, or the best for you & baby (whichever is God's will).
Hugs!!
Sending prayers your way!! I know you love him, and want SO badly for him to come around......my prayers are with that happening, or the best for you & baby (whichever is God's will).
Hugs!!
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Aug 2008
Location: Bend OR
Posts: 197
Thank you everyone for your replies! This was the first place I came when I found out.
I talked to T and he said we'll figure it out. He's actually happy, and still sober. He is on Day 9 and he said it's the longest he thinks he's gone ever. His mom gave him an Al-Anon book to give to me. I haven't started it yet, but I plan too.
I am happy right now at this point in my life. Just in this moment. I don't know what the future holds, but for now I feel peace. He has already put on 15 lbs!!!!!!! His face has filled back out again, and he can't stop eating! He mentioned being scared about how much he has been eating....
Ill be right there with him as this pregnancy progresses
I talked to T and he said we'll figure it out. He's actually happy, and still sober. He is on Day 9 and he said it's the longest he thinks he's gone ever. His mom gave him an Al-Anon book to give to me. I haven't started it yet, but I plan too.
I am happy right now at this point in my life. Just in this moment. I don't know what the future holds, but for now I feel peace. He has already put on 15 lbs!!!!!!! His face has filled back out again, and he can't stop eating! He mentioned being scared about how much he has been eating....
Ill be right there with him as this pregnancy progresses
Member
Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: Flint MI
Posts: 4,455
Congrads honey!!!!!
I am pg with twins as we speak it can be stressful and an exciting time especially with miscarriages for both of you but with both of you pulling together everything can be overcome....good luck and god bless
pamm and edward
I am pg with twins as we speak it can be stressful and an exciting time especially with miscarriages for both of you but with both of you pulling together everything can be overcome....good luck and god bless
pamm and edward
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