Stubborn1

Hello everyone. I am new here. I am seperated from my husband who is an alcoholic. We have been married for close to ten years and seperated the majority of that time due to his work.
I'm joining here so I have a place of my own to share with others who are going through this addiction. I have three children who are getting older and I'm starting to see and hear resentment in their voices. My son who is eight is the one having the worst time. I never wanted them to be mad at their father but he is kinda doing this to himself and turning the kids away from him.
I do not divorce because of financial reasons. I like living without him, it's so much more peaceful. I am very strong and independant......thus the screen name.
Thanks for having me:ghug.

Silverberry1331

Welcome SO!

Keep coming back...this board really helps in the serenity department. Much love to you and your children. Have you tried Al-Alateen for your son? I believe it can help him immensely.

I, too, am separated from my AH. Continue to stay strong and keep coming back!

TTOSBT

Welcome to SR!
You will find some wonderful support here.
Are you or your children involved in recovery? Take a look around and read the stickies in this area.

Stubborn1

No I haven't tried al-ateen for him. He's only eight. I have talked to him about the addiction and we go to church to pray for his father. I don't feel he is old enough to sit in with older kids to talk about this just yet. I have taken him to see a counselor and she said he was perfectly normal and adjusted well. I have him writing his feelings in a journal and we speak very often. Thank you for the suggestion. When he is a bit older I think that would be a wonderful idea.

Stubborn1

My children and myself have all had counseling and go to a support group at our church which is wonderful. I've had MANY years of dealing with this trust me. Sometimes it would be nice to not talk about it. lol

Snickers008

HI STUB....I am pretty new here myself but I welcome you as well!

I have 3 children that were small while living with active alcoholism- now they are ages 17-22 and doing well except the 22 year old is now in rehab himself BUT other than the addiction issue (which I believe is 100% genetic)- they have been successful in school/work/society.

I am thinking your stubbornness is a help rather than a hindrence in your situation....

God Bless you and your 3 little ones!

tennis71

Welcome to SR, this is a very safe and welcoming environment.

Church can be a very supportive environment and very spiritual. Do they have support groups or anything geared specifically for having an alcoholic spouse? If not you might try Al Anon (if you haven't already).

Whatever method of support you chose, I pray that your husband will also find his way into recovery. AA would be great for him as it is both spiritual and supportive. The problem is alcoholics are thick skulled and we have to make our way to the rooms of AA through our worst mistakes. We act insanely, selfishly and we are liars - that is until we sober up, only then can we see the true effect of our addiction and become better people.

There are a lot of moving and informative posts all over this site so you have the opportunity to learn and grow while here.

I pray for you and your children, God will take care of you. I also pray for your husband, he always has the opportunity not to drink, may he take it now.

Thanks for posting and keep coming back and I hope you find this helpful.

:praying