KELS1961

I agree please get your own lawyer. Believe it it is in your best intrest.
Get your own asap.
Kelly....

NOMOMERLOTMAMMA

I am writing as a person who went through a bad (in the beginning) divorce. I went away for the weekend and my H (now exH) called DCF on me for a messy house. They came out, and filed a report. I had to go and be interviewed. Yes, the house was a mess, however, they thought it odd that exH lived there too and never cleaned, and then called DCF. They thought he was a bit nuts, but this did lead to me having to go in for an alcohol assessment. (which I passed even though I was a raging alkie at the time). I'm not proud of it.

My partner had her children taken away for having a less than clean home. This was an extreme, I know, it was bad, but just to give you pause.

Please get all your ducks in a row, take away his ammunition by getting and keeping the house clean. I'd hate for you to have to go through dealing with DCF. Scary. And, like everyone has said, get your own attorney!

wish he'd quit

Thanks everyone for your replies! They are more inspiring than I can begin to tell. I've thought alot today about getting another attorney. The cost was a huge part of it. I dont know how I would pay for it but Im going to call and ask around. I would qualify for legal aide. After the conversation I had today I think it will be best. He is trying so hard to manipulate the whole thing and I said some stuff that I wish I hadn't. I actually let his comments today affect my thinking. He said that he didn't see where I deserve anything. Supposedly I never cooked, cleaned or "was with him" often enough (if you get my drift). I admitted that I was a bad wife to him. It actually made me question just how much I do deserve.

I have done really well on getting the house cleaned up. Still have some work but its alot better. Now its mostly clothes and toys. Im working on laundry and all that good stuff tonight while I study. My question is even if I have a clean house now, if this goes to court and he brings pictures can they do anything then? I know that they would ask him why he doesnt help, but Im still a little concerned about what could happen if it does come up in court. I know its not as serious as drinking and all that but it still worries me.

Barbara52

The only one who can answer your questions is an attorney in your state. Find a way to hire one.

Bernadette

Good on you for the massive clean - up!!! You're changing already!!!

I agree with all above - find a way to get your own attorney and don't give away any more of your "inner thoughts or feelings" about the marriage to this joint attorney.

You can also try your local chapter of Nat'l Organization for Women (NOW) see if they have a list of lawyers who work with women in your situation. Ask friends. Keep seeking!! Good Luck.
B.