I'm back-an update
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Aug 2008
Posts: 163
I'm back-an update
Welcome to my new life and it is great! I still have a million things to do but all in good time. I have to go to the house this weekend as my landlord called and said that he told her I only took what I wanted and left the rest for him to deal with>>>coughing sounds like bullsh88t<<< So I think I am just going to donate the big stuff like the washer and dryer to someone who needs them since I don't have a place here. Hell you can always replace material stuff, you can't replace piece of mind.
It took three days to get everything together but thank God for the holiday weekend. It was not easy although I was so lucky to have such great people helping me. One of the people barely knows me and I was worried that he would get in trouble with his wife as she is out of state but his wife told him to tell me she would have been more upset if he hadn't helped and he will be back again this weekend to help some more.
It has not been the greatest thing I have ever done, I waited as long as I could to transfer the utilities over to the new place, everything was in my name and the long weekend gave him some grace time but I felt bad that electric and cable was cut off yesterday=I don't know if he is still there or not. I am cutting off the water tonight after I do this. He was a complete ass and stone drunk Saturday. He said horrible things about me in front of my friends but they did great in not rising to the bait.
Tuesday and Wednesday had thier moments. I stopped a place to run an errand that when we were together was our "date night" I ran into a friend of his who told me that the reason he let xah go was because of the drinking. xah always made it sound the other way around. My car was about to poop out so I told him I had to go. Yesterday my daughter and I talked about how she tried to tell him on Sat. that she would miss him. His response was "shut up you fat bitch".
Still, I pity him. He is dying but he doesn't know it. His liver is shot and he reaks of it. I have a nursing background, enough to know the smell of death. He carries it with him like a badge of honor. He will drink himself into an early grave, of that I am sure.
I did everything I could and loved him with all that I had. It was time to let go. Of that I am even more sure.
It took three days to get everything together but thank God for the holiday weekend. It was not easy although I was so lucky to have such great people helping me. One of the people barely knows me and I was worried that he would get in trouble with his wife as she is out of state but his wife told him to tell me she would have been more upset if he hadn't helped and he will be back again this weekend to help some more.
It has not been the greatest thing I have ever done, I waited as long as I could to transfer the utilities over to the new place, everything was in my name and the long weekend gave him some grace time but I felt bad that electric and cable was cut off yesterday=I don't know if he is still there or not. I am cutting off the water tonight after I do this. He was a complete ass and stone drunk Saturday. He said horrible things about me in front of my friends but they did great in not rising to the bait.
Tuesday and Wednesday had thier moments. I stopped a place to run an errand that when we were together was our "date night" I ran into a friend of his who told me that the reason he let xah go was because of the drinking. xah always made it sound the other way around. My car was about to poop out so I told him I had to go. Yesterday my daughter and I talked about how she tried to tell him on Sat. that she would miss him. His response was "shut up you fat bitch".
Still, I pity him. He is dying but he doesn't know it. His liver is shot and he reaks of it. I have a nursing background, enough to know the smell of death. He carries it with him like a badge of honor. He will drink himself into an early grave, of that I am sure.
I did everything I could and loved him with all that I had. It was time to let go. Of that I am even more sure.
Last edited by TooMuch4TooLong; 09-04-2008 at 06:23 PM. Reason: I write like a tard sometimes
Member
Join Date: Jul 2007
Location: pa
Posts: 260
I did the same thing as you in Jan.
My AH was MIA so I sold the home without him. He returned to nothing,
as you can imagine he wasn't too happy.
His health problems are major with hep c and cirrhosis.
My kids and I now have PEACE of mind which is priceless.
Good luck to you and enjoy your new life you are so worth it!!!!!
My AH was MIA so I sold the home without him. He returned to nothing,
as you can imagine he wasn't too happy.
His health problems are major with hep c and cirrhosis.
My kids and I now have PEACE of mind which is priceless.
Good luck to you and enjoy your new life you are so worth it!!!!!
Member
Join Date: May 2008
Location: The beautiful Midwest
Posts: 202
Congratulations TooMuch, you have accomplished quite the feat! I know how hard it is, mentally, when the feelings are still there despite the A's behavior, words and actions (or lack of). I am proud of you for staying strong and doing what is BEST for you and your family. Stay strong and keep up the good work.
Hugs
Hugs
Member
Join Date: Jul 2007
Posts: 237
Yesterday my daughter and I talked about how she tried to tell him on Sat. that she would miss him. His response was "shut up you fat bitch".
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Aug 2008
Posts: 163
Mambo-I don't get you wrong at all. I allowed this to go on. He was her step father but we have been with him since she was a little girl. He wasn't always like that with her but when he came back from prison he changed into a different person. I will never ever believe "things weren't so bad", he already tried that the day after I called the police on him. There is no going backward for us, my girl and I have no where to go but forward and up.
She is old enough and has a strong enough sense of self to decide if she wants to go to Alateen, that is her decision. She has asked me if I would be going to Alanon and to be honest this is as close as I will get. I did not have a good experience with the groups I tried, the literature and this board suits me well and helps alot.
I filled out all the divorce paperwork and found out I am going to have to post my kid on ebay to pay for it here, it costs a bloody fortune to file for divorce in FL! Seriously I am going to contact Legal Aid on Monday and see what they can do for me.
Moving expense-$800.00
Futon for mom to sleep on-$100.00
Divorce-$400.00
Peace of Mind-PRICELESS
There are somethings money can't buy, for everything else-Work harder!!!
She is old enough and has a strong enough sense of self to decide if she wants to go to Alateen, that is her decision. She has asked me if I would be going to Alanon and to be honest this is as close as I will get. I did not have a good experience with the groups I tried, the literature and this board suits me well and helps alot.
I filled out all the divorce paperwork and found out I am going to have to post my kid on ebay to pay for it here, it costs a bloody fortune to file for divorce in FL! Seriously I am going to contact Legal Aid on Monday and see what they can do for me.
Moving expense-$800.00
Futon for mom to sleep on-$100.00
Divorce-$400.00
Peace of Mind-PRICELESS
There are somethings money can't buy, for everything else-Work harder!!!
Being Me for the first time
Join Date: Jul 2008
Location: Wishek, North Dakota
Posts: 1,160
toomuch...codo's to you know that had to be hard and things are tuff right now , but it will and does get better . you and your daughter have made it this far , that was the hard part ... were all praying for your peace and serenity and may you finally find true happieness .. peace out !:praying
Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
