Courage to Change ~ July 13~ Focus on TODAY
 

Courage to Change ODAT in Al-Anon II 7/13

How many days of my life have I wasted? I missed the joys of my children’s early years because I was preoccupied with the alcoholic. I rejected overtures of friendship from co-workers so that I could fret uninterrupted about what was bothering me. Not once during those days did I think about my right to enjoy the day.

Al-Anon has led me to see that I have choices, especially about my attitudes. I don’t have to see my life as a tragedy or torment myself with past mistakes or future worries. Today can be the focus of my life. It is filled with interesting activities if I allow myself to see it with a spirit of wonder. When my worries and sorrows cloak me, the laughter and sunshine of the everyday world seem inappropriate to the way I feel. Who is out of sync—the rest of the world or me?

Today’s Reminder

Today I will live in the present and find what I can to enjoy there. If there is pain, I will accept that too. But my pain does not have to completely overshadow the enjoyable parts of my reality. I will participate in making more of my joy. I may join in a conversation at work or at a meeting, tell a joke at the dinner table, or laugh with a friend. Just for today, I might even allow myself to sing.

“Look to this Day!
For it is Life, the very Life of Life.”
From the Sanskrit Salutation of the Dawn

OH my good gosh. I spent a little bit of time there this weekend - when every single person I knew was getting on my nerves. ALL of them ! He said the wrong thing, she was inconsiderate, he was not doing it the way I thought he should.

Then I remembered what my angel sponsor once told me ~ "if everyone is bugging you, then it's NOT about them. It's something going on with YOU!" And you know what, she was right.

It's time for me to journal a bit, talk to some recovery friends, and make sure I get my patootie to a meeting soon. The world isn't off balance. I am.

LOL Yup, that happens. I kept warning my sons this weekend that I was tired and grumpy and to just stay out of my way.

Last night I was out food shopping with my daughter, I found myself getting frustrated because I am trying to think of what I need to buy, search for the cheap brands, keep account in my head of what I've spent, and my daughter was chit chatting away next to me. ''Mum have you seen this, mum look at that, mum can I get my favourite cereal? Mum, mum, mum...''

I found myself telling her that she should know shopping stresses me out and to not chat so much with me. Then I thought, how is she supposed to know? And also if i expect her to make considerations then I should do the same.

Lily xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

How true!!

Bets

What a great post! I so often wonder how many days of my life I have wasted worrying about my AH, not paying full attention to my kids because of the worry chatter in my head, not enjoying days fully because he is not there to enjoy them with me... WOW, time to let go and BREATHE!
XX